I was going strong. I had picked up some steam (talk about an old saying) and I was posting left and right. Then I just stopped. I'm sorry. I have no excuse.
I have had an adventure with vehicles lately. The videos you see on my site, that I actually made, were taken at the Tulip Festival. I stopped in and wandered around for quite a while and took pictures before heading South to meet up with my dad. I dropped my car off at a mechanic he and I like to use down there. Then we headed to his place and hung out with MaryJo, Ricky, the horses, the hens, 2 baby roosters and a bunny. In case you don't know Ricky, and many of you that read the blog don't, he is my nephew. MaryJo's daughter, Anto's son. (I don't think the punctuation or grammar is correct on that last sentence) Anyway we dug a trench for a water line and played some Wii. Then I stole their little blue car and headed to Portland. So far things in Mike's world were fine. Then on Tuesday I went to Clackamas High School to observe a mentor meeting and ran some errands. On the way home I was sitting at a stoplight when the car died. You see, the part I didn't mention was there was a fuse that had been blown before I left and we replaced it. It worked fine. We grabbed some more fuses just in case and that was what blew again. So I was at an intersection, that was all goofy with traffic, because the street had been closed off going one direction because of an accident and because people don't drive very well. So I had a line of cars behind me all honking and pissed while I was changing fuses. The first two I put in popped immediately. Finally the third fuse got the car going and I made it across the street. Only to have that fuse pop. So I pulled over and sat for a few minutes thinking maybe I could milk the last two fuses to get me home if i let the car cool for a bit. It was one of the warmest days we had so far this year, the warmest was the Sunday before this. Well, after several minutes, I put the new fuse in. It actually popped the minute the it was inserted. So I decided to wait a bit longer this time. I grabbed a book and read a couple chapters and tried again. The fuse broke when I turned the key. It was dead, I was stranded. I was also parked on a street that said "No Parking". So I called AAA and nearly 3 hours later got towed home. The mechanic shop was investigating the issue so I was without a car and Ireally needed a car. I ended up having to rent a car. Everything was resolved by Saturday but I had 3 days of rental that I had not planned for. My car was finished and ready to go that week as well but I was not able to get it until this weekend, a week and a half later. I cruised my dad's ride last week waiting to get my car.
My dad went to Eugene, that same crazy Saturday when I got his car back and returned the rental car, and he flew down to visit my Grandpa. He took my car and left it at the airport. The plan was that he would get back Thursday and come for a visit bringing my car up. His flight was goofy. He drove to Eugene. Then got on a plane and headed to Portland and then got on another plane and headed South to California. On the way back they had overbooked and he took the option to stay in Portland for a voucher credit and a refund of his flight to Eugene. So on Saturday we headed South to get my car and I then followed down to his homestead. This time I took pictures and helped put chicken wire on a frame to give the now much bigger baby roosters a separate space from the hens. They had also acquired 3 new baby hens since I had last visited. Ricky and I went exploring a little bit and we watched some Youtube. I came back up to Portland amidst the craziest rainy day ever! It was pouring all day. My friends decided it was to wet to go get a drink (that we had planned to get three days before) and so I sat around playing with camera stuff.
Ebay and I have become friends as I have been searching for 35 mm SLR cameras in working condition. Now I am looking for lenses for these cameras. One of the cameras is going to my niece Katie, who is a photography enthusiast, for her birthday. I never should have started with Ebay... It might just be the devil! I simply can't stop checking it. Although I have seriously slowed my bidding. My advice to new ebayers is to bid on one item at a time. If you bid on 8 cameras you might end up winning 8! I ended up winning 3 but it was close on the other 5. I had actually wanted 2 so I will be figuring out what to do with the third camera later. Once I get the 3rd camera I will be deciding which to give, which to keep and which to try and sell! If you want a 35 mm slr camera I might just be your guy!
In other news, I have recently bought my plane ticket to Phoenix. I will be down May 31st to June 5th. Jessica is graduating high school and Kevin is graduating college this month. So I am heading down to celebrate!
Sorry about not having any funny story about metal detectors and government buildings this time.
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
Monday, April 20, 2009
My cruising vehicle!
I take you on a breathtaking tour of "how I roll!" Take a look at my sweet sweet ride!
Volvo makes a tractor
My second video explores the wonderful legacy of the Volvo tractor. It is groundbreaking!
Friday, April 17, 2009
The Flower Conspiracy
My first video with my new Flip Ultra video camera! Taken at the Tulip Festival.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
This is a test of the emergency updating system.
This is only a test.
Haha! It's strange how this test will look and feel like a real update (because it is). I woke up this morning ready to record a podcast.... unfortunately the groundskeepers decided today would be a fantastic day to use leaf blowers and other amazingly loud devices. The place is not very big so it always amazes me how long it takes these.... people.... to take care of the property (expletives were wanted here but I chose to say people to keep this more or less a PG rated blog). I always go through various urges to go out and kill. I tend to daydream of smashing their overly loud equipment against the concrete and handing them a broom. What ever happened to using a freaking broom? I can't stand the leaf blowers especially when they start before 8 AM! Of course, I have used a leaf blower and know that they are fantastically fun when you are the wielder. The noise is less annoying when you are using them then when you are debating whether or not to move from your comfortable bed and some jerk is running one right outside your window. Either way it is too loud to record a podcast at the moment and I can't say that I am completely awake enough to pull it off anyhow.
Let's move on to other topics. Lately I have been learning a new set of lessons for Mad Science. They are pretty cool looking but I feel nervous because I am not as familiar with them as I would like to be. Of course I will only be fully familiar with them once I actually teach them and get a real feel for the class. Either way I am looking forward to the challenge, unease and all.
Ooooh.... they have moved on to a power washer. Fantastic! If I only had Archimedes' Death Ray!
I have started a new 8 week course in my masters program and it is going swimmingly. Except for the whole fact that I think school sucks and wish that the purveyors of higher education, in all it's ridiculousness, would spontaneously combust in a most hilarious manner. I am forcing myself to jump through the hoops and the whole "I should have ran off to China" idea keeps reverberating in my brain. Yay school!
Of course in a weird turn of events I am thoroughly enjoying my beginning Japanese class. I can't say I remember very well yet but it is only my second week. Either way I like the class and feel excited to go every Wednesday! I think the excitement stems from actually learning something, which is sorely lacking in classes that shall remain nameless.
Last Friday, my friend Edie and I went to see The Roots in concert. The Roots are my favorite hip hop band and have nothing to do with the Alex Haley book or the made for TV miniseries starring the Reading Rainbow guy. Either way they are one of the few hip hop groups using real instruments. They have a fantastic drummer, Questlove, who is also a great DJ. They had a gentleman on the bongos, bass guitar, guitar and tuba as well. They completely brought it and rocked the night away. It was amazing. You should check out their music at Last.FM for free, realize that they are awesome, and then buy an album or two.
Yesterday I got a call from my friend Betty who was in a bit of a quandary. You see she needed to deal with some tax issues left over from the 2007 taxes. She was headed downtown and wanted company. She was not terribly worried about the evil of the IRS, at least not anymore worried then most people are. No, she was worried about the randoms. Betty is the type of person that attracts the randoms to lather in excitement. By random I mean the crazies of this city. Betty must look like someone they can and should talk to because they do and they follow her around as she ties to make good her escape. Of course she also lacks the ability to tell them "No, go away!" Not that I have that ability either but it is not that much of an issue. The conversations don't start very often and when they do they don't go on for very long. They most certainly don't follow me. Which is why I am a great person to elect for a mission such as this. All I had planned besides that was killing time with Facebook, doing some boring homework, finishing my Japanese writing homework and then going to NELA. All of which I managed even with a day of occupying various government offices. The Federal IRS office was very similar to a DMV. We got a number and had to stare at a digital display waiting for out number to come up. Of course like the DMV they don't just have one set of numbers but several so what looks like 12 people in front of you is more like 20. Unfortunately we needed the state office..... which was not in the same building and was actually back across the river nar my house. We snuck into a Buffalo Wild Wings before heading over to the other office. I had a tasty salad topped with buffalo tenders drenched in the Asian Zing sauce and a wonderful Huckleberry Lemonade. Then we headed over the river and through the woods, to grandmother's house we... wait. Nope, just over the river. We entered the building and headed to the office. There we discovered what she needed to know, which of course will require a follow up visit and more copies. Either way I was entertained and had the opportunity to get out of the house with something to do besides window shop.
Wait! I forgot an entertaining subplot of the story. Recently I have become enamored with Anime. The one I am currently in the midst of watching is Naruto. Naruto is about a ninja named Naruto and his various friends. It is pretty entertaining but I had not really expected it to hold interesting ideas for me. The idea was subtle enough that at first I had no idea that I had picked up on it. What is this brilliant idea I got from a cartoon? Well in Naruto's world everyone trains and works hard to move to the next level of ninjadom. Of course as ninja they can do some pretty cool things like flip around, build up energy until it crackles like electricity and what not. Of course my ideas were simpler then that and they came from several characters but they were driven home by a character named Brock Lee. Which is probably the funniest name in the show. At first you think Brock is his first name? And then you put the two together and add in his green jumper and laugh hysterically about him being a vegetable. Or at least I do. That is beside the point. Brock Lee is fighting an evil psycho kid to get in to an exam to test for the next level of ninja. He is fighting the kid and moving fast but the other guy is faster. So as his reveal he takes off these huge ankle weights that literally crack the floor and is now moving like three times faster. Now, I am not thinking "ooh I wish I was 3 times faster!" I am thinking "Ankle weights seem like a good way to get a little extra leg workout while just doing normal walking." So I go out and buy ankle weights and of course I have them on for our visit to the Federal building. I had to explain that they were just ankle weights and felt goofy taking them off and putting them back on again. Of course the weights did not quite dent the floor as they are not super heavy. I am kind of surprised I didn't get a more intimate search by the feds after being so silly as to where them into their building.
Haha! It's strange how this test will look and feel like a real update (because it is). I woke up this morning ready to record a podcast.... unfortunately the groundskeepers decided today would be a fantastic day to use leaf blowers and other amazingly loud devices. The place is not very big so it always amazes me how long it takes these.... people.... to take care of the property (expletives were wanted here but I chose to say people to keep this more or less a PG rated blog). I always go through various urges to go out and kill. I tend to daydream of smashing their overly loud equipment against the concrete and handing them a broom. What ever happened to using a freaking broom? I can't stand the leaf blowers especially when they start before 8 AM! Of course, I have used a leaf blower and know that they are fantastically fun when you are the wielder. The noise is less annoying when you are using them then when you are debating whether or not to move from your comfortable bed and some jerk is running one right outside your window. Either way it is too loud to record a podcast at the moment and I can't say that I am completely awake enough to pull it off anyhow.
Let's move on to other topics. Lately I have been learning a new set of lessons for Mad Science. They are pretty cool looking but I feel nervous because I am not as familiar with them as I would like to be. Of course I will only be fully familiar with them once I actually teach them and get a real feel for the class. Either way I am looking forward to the challenge, unease and all.
Ooooh.... they have moved on to a power washer. Fantastic! If I only had Archimedes' Death Ray!
I have started a new 8 week course in my masters program and it is going swimmingly. Except for the whole fact that I think school sucks and wish that the purveyors of higher education, in all it's ridiculousness, would spontaneously combust in a most hilarious manner. I am forcing myself to jump through the hoops and the whole "I should have ran off to China" idea keeps reverberating in my brain. Yay school!
Of course in a weird turn of events I am thoroughly enjoying my beginning Japanese class. I can't say I remember very well yet but it is only my second week. Either way I like the class and feel excited to go every Wednesday! I think the excitement stems from actually learning something, which is sorely lacking in classes that shall remain nameless.
Last Friday, my friend Edie and I went to see The Roots in concert. The Roots are my favorite hip hop band and have nothing to do with the Alex Haley book or the made for TV miniseries starring the Reading Rainbow guy. Either way they are one of the few hip hop groups using real instruments. They have a fantastic drummer, Questlove, who is also a great DJ. They had a gentleman on the bongos, bass guitar, guitar and tuba as well. They completely brought it and rocked the night away. It was amazing. You should check out their music at Last.FM for free, realize that they are awesome, and then buy an album or two.
Yesterday I got a call from my friend Betty who was in a bit of a quandary. You see she needed to deal with some tax issues left over from the 2007 taxes. She was headed downtown and wanted company. She was not terribly worried about the evil of the IRS, at least not anymore worried then most people are. No, she was worried about the randoms. Betty is the type of person that attracts the randoms to lather in excitement. By random I mean the crazies of this city. Betty must look like someone they can and should talk to because they do and they follow her around as she ties to make good her escape. Of course she also lacks the ability to tell them "No, go away!" Not that I have that ability either but it is not that much of an issue. The conversations don't start very often and when they do they don't go on for very long. They most certainly don't follow me. Which is why I am a great person to elect for a mission such as this. All I had planned besides that was killing time with Facebook, doing some boring homework, finishing my Japanese writing homework and then going to NELA. All of which I managed even with a day of occupying various government offices. The Federal IRS office was very similar to a DMV. We got a number and had to stare at a digital display waiting for out number to come up. Of course like the DMV they don't just have one set of numbers but several so what looks like 12 people in front of you is more like 20. Unfortunately we needed the state office..... which was not in the same building and was actually back across the river nar my house. We snuck into a Buffalo Wild Wings before heading over to the other office. I had a tasty salad topped with buffalo tenders drenched in the Asian Zing sauce and a wonderful Huckleberry Lemonade. Then we headed over the river and through the woods, to grandmother's house we... wait. Nope, just over the river. We entered the building and headed to the office. There we discovered what she needed to know, which of course will require a follow up visit and more copies. Either way I was entertained and had the opportunity to get out of the house with something to do besides window shop.
Wait! I forgot an entertaining subplot of the story. Recently I have become enamored with Anime. The one I am currently in the midst of watching is Naruto. Naruto is about a ninja named Naruto and his various friends. It is pretty entertaining but I had not really expected it to hold interesting ideas for me. The idea was subtle enough that at first I had no idea that I had picked up on it. What is this brilliant idea I got from a cartoon? Well in Naruto's world everyone trains and works hard to move to the next level of ninjadom. Of course as ninja they can do some pretty cool things like flip around, build up energy until it crackles like electricity and what not. Of course my ideas were simpler then that and they came from several characters but they were driven home by a character named Brock Lee. Which is probably the funniest name in the show. At first you think Brock is his first name? And then you put the two together and add in his green jumper and laugh hysterically about him being a vegetable. Or at least I do. That is beside the point. Brock Lee is fighting an evil psycho kid to get in to an exam to test for the next level of ninja. He is fighting the kid and moving fast but the other guy is faster. So as his reveal he takes off these huge ankle weights that literally crack the floor and is now moving like three times faster. Now, I am not thinking "ooh I wish I was 3 times faster!" I am thinking "Ankle weights seem like a good way to get a little extra leg workout while just doing normal walking." So I go out and buy ankle weights and of course I have them on for our visit to the Federal building. I had to explain that they were just ankle weights and felt goofy taking them off and putting them back on again. Of course the weights did not quite dent the floor as they are not super heavy. I am kind of surprised I didn't get a more intimate search by the feds after being so silly as to where them into their building.
Tuesday, April 07, 2009
The Guest Room pt. 9
It had been nearly a week since Joshua had arrived in Flagstaff. Dave had not said a word about New Mexico. He had simply went about his regular business; computer work he did from his home office. He put out two plates of food at each meal even if Joshua was not up to coming down the hall to eat. Joshua felt as if he was in limbo. He knew Dave was just waiting for the word, he was ready. Joshua wasn't. The downtime he had endured after the accident had allowed him to think. He wished he hadn't had the luxury. He had been overwhelmed by fears of the unknown becoming his worst nightmare. The fear of finding out what happened was paralyzing. He couldn't talk about it and he sure couldn't move forward. Part of him wondered if he truly needed to know what had happened to Sarah; she was gone after all. He knew this was just his fear and vulnerability talking. He knew that he would never truly sleep until he knew what happened and could lay her to rest.
Knowing that he needed to do it had not driven him to get it done. There was so much he had to take care of medically before he could do what he needed to do in New Mexico. He was getting used to moving awkwardly and his breaks, cracks and sprains were hurting him less each day. In fact, unless he did something incredibly stupid his ribs hardly hurt him. Unfortunately incredibly stupid things were done at least once a day. The doctor had advised he rest for at least 6 weeks to heal the ribs and broken leg; he was currently amidst the second week and going crazy. His ankle needed anywhere from 4 to 8 weeks to heal. He had been looking at Web MD hoping to find better news about the time it would take to be fully mobile but had been disappointed when the information provided had coincided with the doctor's predictions. He had no idea why he had thought it would be different, he was just hoping it was. He had definitely done a number on himself. He often wished he could see what his car had looked like after the accident. It must have been ugly.
The court case was a little bit of a stress as well but Tom was true to his word and was on top of it. Tom had made an offer to the prosecutor to lower the DUI to something less notorious and so far the offer was still on the table. Joshua's rates would probably go up but a lesser offense was a world better then a bogus DUI charge. DUI's stayed with you forever and required a lot of extra paper work. To have a DUI without being intoxicated seemed incredibly unfair. He sighed at the thought and turned back to the window. He watched the elderly man ride his scooter out to check the mail; there seemed to be another day of no mail for the old man. He wondered what the man had been hoping for. He closed his eyes on that world of possibilities.
______________________________________________________
Joshua saw her that night. She was outside his window just staring at him. There was no emotion on her face but Joshua felt as if she was calling to him somehow. Screaming for him; psychically reaching for him. He woke up screaming her name. He attempted to move toward the window, forgetting his body's condition. He fell hard to the ground and pain shot through him but he kept crawling toward the window and pulled himself up to see her in the window. He stood there looking out; searching for her. It took him several minutes to realize that she had been in his dream. Sarah was not standing outside wating for him.
His heart was racing and his breath came in fast bursts that sent pain shooting through his body. The door was thrown open and a half awake Dave rushed in holding a pistol. He looked at Joshua and nodded. "I'll pack the car. We'll leave at dawn." Dave turned and left the room.
Joshua felt the hot tears bubble to the surface and send hot rivulets streaming down his cheeks. He was broken in more ways then one.
Knowing that he needed to do it had not driven him to get it done. There was so much he had to take care of medically before he could do what he needed to do in New Mexico. He was getting used to moving awkwardly and his breaks, cracks and sprains were hurting him less each day. In fact, unless he did something incredibly stupid his ribs hardly hurt him. Unfortunately incredibly stupid things were done at least once a day. The doctor had advised he rest for at least 6 weeks to heal the ribs and broken leg; he was currently amidst the second week and going crazy. His ankle needed anywhere from 4 to 8 weeks to heal. He had been looking at Web MD hoping to find better news about the time it would take to be fully mobile but had been disappointed when the information provided had coincided with the doctor's predictions. He had no idea why he had thought it would be different, he was just hoping it was. He had definitely done a number on himself. He often wished he could see what his car had looked like after the accident. It must have been ugly.
The court case was a little bit of a stress as well but Tom was true to his word and was on top of it. Tom had made an offer to the prosecutor to lower the DUI to something less notorious and so far the offer was still on the table. Joshua's rates would probably go up but a lesser offense was a world better then a bogus DUI charge. DUI's stayed with you forever and required a lot of extra paper work. To have a DUI without being intoxicated seemed incredibly unfair. He sighed at the thought and turned back to the window. He watched the elderly man ride his scooter out to check the mail; there seemed to be another day of no mail for the old man. He wondered what the man had been hoping for. He closed his eyes on that world of possibilities.
______________________________________________________
Joshua saw her that night. She was outside his window just staring at him. There was no emotion on her face but Joshua felt as if she was calling to him somehow. Screaming for him; psychically reaching for him. He woke up screaming her name. He attempted to move toward the window, forgetting his body's condition. He fell hard to the ground and pain shot through him but he kept crawling toward the window and pulled himself up to see her in the window. He stood there looking out; searching for her. It took him several minutes to realize that she had been in his dream. Sarah was not standing outside wating for him.
His heart was racing and his breath came in fast bursts that sent pain shooting through his body. The door was thrown open and a half awake Dave rushed in holding a pistol. He looked at Joshua and nodded. "I'll pack the car. We'll leave at dawn." Dave turned and left the room.
Joshua felt the hot tears bubble to the surface and send hot rivulets streaming down his cheeks. He was broken in more ways then one.
Sunday, April 05, 2009
Thursday, April 02, 2009
Sorry that I was MIA!
Wow! I promise I am still alive even though it has been a while since I posted anything. School progressed to such a point that the idea of writing anything became deplorable and I wasn't even able to outline anything for a podcast. Without the outline I am not much good at making a podcast with any direction. Of course some would argue that I had no direction anyway but it could be much worse. Believe me... I actually hear dozens of recordings before I send out the crappy one for you to listen to. So yeah my apathy was incredibly high last week and most of this one. Tonight I get to pontificate upon the reform movement sweeping through science and mathematic curriculums. It shall be riveting....
I signed up with Twitter this week and I am not exactly sure why. So far I am not enamored by it but I will let you know how that goes. Speaking of things I am enamored with... SKYPE! Get on it and let's chat! All you need is a web camera and a quick Skype download and we could connect. It is fun to not only hear people but see them too! I am going to try and get another part of The Guest Room up by Sunday and hopefully a podcast as well. Keep your eyes peeled!
I signed up with Twitter this week and I am not exactly sure why. So far I am not enamored by it but I will let you know how that goes. Speaking of things I am enamored with... SKYPE! Get on it and let's chat! All you need is a web camera and a quick Skype download and we could connect. It is fun to not only hear people but see them too! I am going to try and get another part of The Guest Room up by Sunday and hopefully a podcast as well. Keep your eyes peeled!
Sunday, March 22, 2009
The Guest Room Pt. 8
They arrived in Flagstaff and were waiting at Buffalo Wild Wings for Dave to join them and lead them back to his house. Tom had ordered a giant batch of wings to share and a beer for himself. Joshua's pain medication negated his ability to imbibe in an alcoholic beverage and instead he was staring, slightly sullenly, at a cola. Tom was chattering away with the cute little waitress; a normal behavior. He loved flirting with any girl that crossed his path. Joshua just zoned out and stared at one of the big screens displaying Sportscenter. He was not sure what the show was going on about as the pain medication made zoning out a blissful art form. At least he was not drooling. Another benefit he received was not feeling insecure about his cast and his seriously bruised face.
As he slowly thought about the benefits of pain medication, his line of sight was blocked. He refocused his eyes with a little effort and saw it was Dave standing there. Dave had a smile on his face that was framed by a mess of dark curls. He looked like someone who had no use for a comb; anyone could tell those curls would not submit to being told how to lay. Dave's mouth began moving and Joshua applied all his attention to focusing on what he was saying. His fondness for the pain medication began to wane as he found it difficult to shit gears. He of course was able to focus for "You look like crap Josh!" He offered a grimace before offering a reply.
"My appearance will slowly get better. You are stuck with how you look." Dave laughed in response and took a seat. Then grabbed Tom's beer and drank down half of it before launching into the wings. Tom tried to protest but Dave simply smiled at Tom with a sauce covered grin before downing the rest of the beer. Tom gave him an evil glare then ordered a couple more beers.
"So what is the deal about the accident? You in trouble? Do we need to wait until that is cleared up?" Dave asked between shoveling wings in his mouth.
"Court is set for a month from now. As long as Joshua can remain in contact with me everything that needs to get done can be figured out. Keep me up to date and stay in contact and we can make it work." Tom replied.
"No problem. We will definitely keep you in the loop. You gonna stay the night at least?" Dave asked.
"Yeah but I will be out of here early tomorrow. I have to get back to the office and get ready for trial for a doozy of a case on Monday."
"Thanks again for getting me out of jail and on to Flagstaff. I hope I didn't cause too much trouble." Joshua said.
Tom just nodded and smiled at the waitress as she approached with the beers.
As he slowly thought about the benefits of pain medication, his line of sight was blocked. He refocused his eyes with a little effort and saw it was Dave standing there. Dave had a smile on his face that was framed by a mess of dark curls. He looked like someone who had no use for a comb; anyone could tell those curls would not submit to being told how to lay. Dave's mouth began moving and Joshua applied all his attention to focusing on what he was saying. His fondness for the pain medication began to wane as he found it difficult to shit gears. He of course was able to focus for "You look like crap Josh!" He offered a grimace before offering a reply.
"My appearance will slowly get better. You are stuck with how you look." Dave laughed in response and took a seat. Then grabbed Tom's beer and drank down half of it before launching into the wings. Tom tried to protest but Dave simply smiled at Tom with a sauce covered grin before downing the rest of the beer. Tom gave him an evil glare then ordered a couple more beers.
"So what is the deal about the accident? You in trouble? Do we need to wait until that is cleared up?" Dave asked between shoveling wings in his mouth.
"Court is set for a month from now. As long as Joshua can remain in contact with me everything that needs to get done can be figured out. Keep me up to date and stay in contact and we can make it work." Tom replied.
"No problem. We will definitely keep you in the loop. You gonna stay the night at least?" Dave asked.
"Yeah but I will be out of here early tomorrow. I have to get back to the office and get ready for trial for a doozy of a case on Monday."
"Thanks again for getting me out of jail and on to Flagstaff. I hope I didn't cause too much trouble." Joshua said.
Tom just nodded and smiled at the waitress as she approached with the beers.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
March 21st Podcast
I did a few book reviews and a few movie reviews on this installment.
Check out this spot to get to the podcast: http://www.box.net/shared/3g5xstt2my
You can also go to Last.FM and find me there. You won't even need to download anything! You can check out both podcasts there but the latest one is called March 21st Podcast. Here is my page at Last.FM: http://www.last.fm/music/Crazed+Lunatik+Designs
This spot should lso have a link but so far is not showing it much to my irritation.
http://feeds2.feedburner.com/CrazedLunatiksBlog
Looking for some feedback! I am thinking of switching blog providers and will let you know if I do so.
Check out this spot to get to the podcast: http://www.box.net/shared/3g5xstt2my
You can also go to Last.FM and find me there. You won't even need to download anything! You can check out both podcasts there but the latest one is called March 21st Podcast. Here is my page at Last.FM: http://www.last.fm/music/Crazed+Lunatik+Designs
This spot should lso have a link but so far is not showing it much to my irritation.
http://feeds2.feedburner.com/CrazedLunatiksBlog
Looking for some feedback! I am thinking of switching blog providers and will let you know if I do so.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
The Guest Room Pt. 7
Joshua had two cracked ribs, his left leg and ankle were broken, sore wrists, a concussion, an aching back, 2 black eyes, a broken nose, a lot of minor cuts, a pretty decent one above his eye, a slightly ticked farmer complaining about his irrigation ditch and a few feet of barb wire fence, and a cop who was telling him he might face a possible DUI charge. He kept hoping his smashed car would fall through the roof and smash the officer. Since that was not likely to happen, he utilized his right not to incriminate himself and sat there silently. A call had been made to a lawyer friend earlier. His friend lived in California, the state where Joshua was and the state he had almost made it out of before falling asleep behind the wheel and flipping his car into an irrigation ditch. His friend had told him to request a toxicology report be taken by the hospital staff and not to say anything at all to anyone about what happend or didn't happen. He was to refer all questions to his friend, who was now his lawyer.
The police man sighed with frustration as he realized Joshua wasn't talking. It was an overly dramatic sigh as far as Joshua was concerned. Close as he could tell, other then the cop's irritation over people exercising their rights, the man had nothing to be exasperated about. It wasn't as if the officer was in a hospital bed, in pain, stranded far away from home and his intended destination, and feeling delayed grief over his missing wife. Nope, that described Joshua, not the cop. Yet this guy sighed like Joshua was unreasonable for keeping his mouth shut instead of helping him make his case. Joshua wasn't going to open his mouth and get himself hooked with a stickable charge, especially a false one. Why couldn't this man just go away?
Then, like magic, the officer did. He promised, as he left, to be available when Joshua "felt like telling the truth." Instead, Joshua called for the nurse. He was starting to feel the injuries again and just wanted to sleep.
-------------- A day later ------------------------
"Josh! You look like someone dragged you through Hades, face first." Tom said in greeting. Tom had come down from San Diego to pick Josh up and get him the rest of the way to Flagstaff. He had apparently stopped at a few places first, one of which had been the police station to get a copy of the incident report. Tom was taking his job as lawyer seriously. He had managed to keep Josh out of jail when he got released from the hospital and was preparing a case to fight the DUI charge. He told Josh not to worry about it too much as he would be kept in the loop as the case progressed. He had also advised Joshua to not head out of reasonable range for the next month as he might be needed back here.
"Tom. It looks like you slimed your way to the top! Check out that tailored business suit!" He said in a mocking response. This was the first smile Joshua had given in days. It was good to see Tom. It was even better to be leaving the hospital, and soon the town.
"C'mon! You know me I'm too manly for suits off the rack! Let's get you out of here!" Tom grabbed the wheel chair reigns from the orderly and wheeled Joshua towards the exit. "Will get something to eat before we hit the road. This town has a great little burger place. I stop here every time I pass within an hour's drive of here...." Joshua just nodded his assent as they headed out of the hospital.
The police man sighed with frustration as he realized Joshua wasn't talking. It was an overly dramatic sigh as far as Joshua was concerned. Close as he could tell, other then the cop's irritation over people exercising their rights, the man had nothing to be exasperated about. It wasn't as if the officer was in a hospital bed, in pain, stranded far away from home and his intended destination, and feeling delayed grief over his missing wife. Nope, that described Joshua, not the cop. Yet this guy sighed like Joshua was unreasonable for keeping his mouth shut instead of helping him make his case. Joshua wasn't going to open his mouth and get himself hooked with a stickable charge, especially a false one. Why couldn't this man just go away?
Then, like magic, the officer did. He promised, as he left, to be available when Joshua "felt like telling the truth." Instead, Joshua called for the nurse. He was starting to feel the injuries again and just wanted to sleep.
-------------- A day later ------------------------
"Josh! You look like someone dragged you through Hades, face first." Tom said in greeting. Tom had come down from San Diego to pick Josh up and get him the rest of the way to Flagstaff. He had apparently stopped at a few places first, one of which had been the police station to get a copy of the incident report. Tom was taking his job as lawyer seriously. He had managed to keep Josh out of jail when he got released from the hospital and was preparing a case to fight the DUI charge. He told Josh not to worry about it too much as he would be kept in the loop as the case progressed. He had also advised Joshua to not head out of reasonable range for the next month as he might be needed back here.
"Tom. It looks like you slimed your way to the top! Check out that tailored business suit!" He said in a mocking response. This was the first smile Joshua had given in days. It was good to see Tom. It was even better to be leaving the hospital, and soon the town.
"C'mon! You know me I'm too manly for suits off the rack! Let's get you out of here!" Tom grabbed the wheel chair reigns from the orderly and wheeled Joshua towards the exit. "Will get something to eat before we hit the road. This town has a great little burger place. I stop here every time I pass within an hour's drive of here...." Joshua just nodded his assent as they headed out of the hospital.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Interacting While Sick
I have a cold and I have had a cold since Wednesday of last week (although it really hit full force Thursday evening). I have made 7 days with this stupid thing and by all reports this particular cold is a lingerer. The first few days were terrible. I was achy and exhausted but I went and did stuff I needed to do. I had no real option. It was in these first few days of my cold that I had an encounter that made me wonder about people's lack of tact and compassion. Let me explain. I was waiting in an area where a group would congregate and a meeting of some sort would take place (I am being vague on purpose). I set myself as far away from people as possible and told the people I usually sit by "Hey I have a cold so keep a protective bubble around yourself." Anyway this was before most of these people showed. I was the third person there. I had a few sneezes that I had tissues all prepared for, if I coughed I did so in a tissue. Luckily it was not the coughing part of the cold yet, that is happening now. I was just sneezy which is always heaviest in the beginning of the cold for me. Anyway I sneezed while I was getting a tissue out of one of those small packs (I had 4 small packs in my pocket). The sneeze was real loud and powerful but combined with the plastic of the tissue pack it was also high pitched. You see I had been trying to get the tissue out in preparation when, without sufficient warning, a sneeze hit me. I covered my face in the attempt to keep my germs away from those around me. The 2 people made fun of the high pitched sneeze as I went to make sure I had nothing on me and wash my hands. I came back to the room and sat down. From then on I had tissues out of the package way before I even needed them, in fact I think I sneezed like once more. That had sucked, I had learned a lesson. Anyway, like ten minutes later, while I was staring at a text message on my phone (I was really early) one of the 2 people asked "Wait.... are you sick?"
To which I said "Yeah." As honesty is always an option for any question. Plus I was way too sick to offer a clever remark.
What do you think her response was? Here is a multiple choice selection.
A. Oh, that sucks. Hope you get better soon.
B. Maybe you could see about skipping the meeting and going home early.
C. Stay away from me!
D. Well, you better cover your mouth if you cough or sneeze!
E. I love the Mets!
Maybe this will help you guess the right answer. My response was a stunned smile.... the kind where you have no response because what the person said was not only self centered but also amazingly insulting. The response was D.... and good try to those that missed it. It wasn't C because although it is self centered it is not really terribly insulting. It wasn't A or B because there was no chance of compassion causing me to silently stew over this for days. It wasn't E because I have yet to meet a Mets fan, and as a result, I have concluded that they don't in fact exist. It's like saying you know Bigfoot...
Back to the response. Here is why it is insulting. First of all I am not a 5 year old. Second of all part of the reason she asked was because I have a tissue in my hand and had just used it to cover my mouth for a half cough (meaning the kind where you cough like once but it isn't the full fledged forceful cough nor is it a coughing fit). Third, she saw me sneeze in to my hand and on a package of pocket tissues (and mocked me afterward). I am doing everything I can to keep the germs near me. I am not sitting close to her. I am also covering my mouth and nose because I am, in fact, an adult. So I smiled because I was hoping she was teasing me and also because I was stunned by her comment (knowing instinctively that she was not kidding).
Of course the smile got me a lecture as to why it was paramount that she avoid getting a cold. She mistook my stunned smile as a sarcastic reply. I was on cough medicine! I am not all that good at sarcasm when most of my brain is in the clouds! I was just going through the steps I usually take on a Friday night, perhaps I should have plead to skip the meeting or something but I did not even think of it until nearly three days later. That is what I mean, cough syrup puts me in cruise control. I almost need someone saying "Hey you look terrible. Go home and go to bed and come back for Monday's meeting." To which I would say "OK" and my cruise control would take me to the car and get me home. Later I would think "Why didn't I think of that?" Anyway this girl had very good reasons to want to avoid getting sick. Of course, who doesn't? Being sick sucks and is very inconvenient. What other reason do you need? It wasn't like I had went over and licked her or that I had even sat near her. I avoid people when I am sick as much as possible. Just ask the people I felt I could cancel with... the volunteer gigs. I have only went to the places I had to go since Thursday afternoon; the paying job and school. I emailed and contacted the various volunteer gigs and canceled my scheduled time for the day. I don't want to get people sick. I do admit this particular girl has a lot going on in the next month or two that requires her to not be sick. More so then the average person but why be rude about it? Why assume I am an idiot or a cretin? Or a maroon!? (thank you Bugs Bunny)
Maybe I am totally blowing this out of proportion, I am a little whiny because of this stupid cold. However, my whininess doesn't mean that I am not right. The whole thing could have been handled better. The best part is this particular person is a bit of a hypocrite. She dragged her dumb butt there when she was sick a month before. What is with the attitude when I do the same thing? Did I give you attitude? No all I said was "That sucks. Get better soon." You know the saying about kicking someone while there down? I just don't get it. Were is Miss Manners when I need her? Where the heck have all the "polishing schools" gone??? We could all really use them!
To which I said "Yeah." As honesty is always an option for any question. Plus I was way too sick to offer a clever remark.
What do you think her response was? Here is a multiple choice selection.
A. Oh, that sucks. Hope you get better soon.
B. Maybe you could see about skipping the meeting and going home early.
C. Stay away from me!
D. Well, you better cover your mouth if you cough or sneeze!
E. I love the Mets!
Maybe this will help you guess the right answer. My response was a stunned smile.... the kind where you have no response because what the person said was not only self centered but also amazingly insulting. The response was D.... and good try to those that missed it. It wasn't C because although it is self centered it is not really terribly insulting. It wasn't A or B because there was no chance of compassion causing me to silently stew over this for days. It wasn't E because I have yet to meet a Mets fan, and as a result, I have concluded that they don't in fact exist. It's like saying you know Bigfoot...
Back to the response. Here is why it is insulting. First of all I am not a 5 year old. Second of all part of the reason she asked was because I have a tissue in my hand and had just used it to cover my mouth for a half cough (meaning the kind where you cough like once but it isn't the full fledged forceful cough nor is it a coughing fit). Third, she saw me sneeze in to my hand and on a package of pocket tissues (and mocked me afterward). I am doing everything I can to keep the germs near me. I am not sitting close to her. I am also covering my mouth and nose because I am, in fact, an adult. So I smiled because I was hoping she was teasing me and also because I was stunned by her comment (knowing instinctively that she was not kidding).
Of course the smile got me a lecture as to why it was paramount that she avoid getting a cold. She mistook my stunned smile as a sarcastic reply. I was on cough medicine! I am not all that good at sarcasm when most of my brain is in the clouds! I was just going through the steps I usually take on a Friday night, perhaps I should have plead to skip the meeting or something but I did not even think of it until nearly three days later. That is what I mean, cough syrup puts me in cruise control. I almost need someone saying "Hey you look terrible. Go home and go to bed and come back for Monday's meeting." To which I would say "OK" and my cruise control would take me to the car and get me home. Later I would think "Why didn't I think of that?" Anyway this girl had very good reasons to want to avoid getting sick. Of course, who doesn't? Being sick sucks and is very inconvenient. What other reason do you need? It wasn't like I had went over and licked her or that I had even sat near her. I avoid people when I am sick as much as possible. Just ask the people I felt I could cancel with... the volunteer gigs. I have only went to the places I had to go since Thursday afternoon; the paying job and school. I emailed and contacted the various volunteer gigs and canceled my scheduled time for the day. I don't want to get people sick. I do admit this particular girl has a lot going on in the next month or two that requires her to not be sick. More so then the average person but why be rude about it? Why assume I am an idiot or a cretin? Or a maroon!? (thank you Bugs Bunny)
Maybe I am totally blowing this out of proportion, I am a little whiny because of this stupid cold. However, my whininess doesn't mean that I am not right. The whole thing could have been handled better. The best part is this particular person is a bit of a hypocrite. She dragged her dumb butt there when she was sick a month before. What is with the attitude when I do the same thing? Did I give you attitude? No all I said was "That sucks. Get better soon." You know the saying about kicking someone while there down? I just don't get it. Were is Miss Manners when I need her? Where the heck have all the "polishing schools" gone??? We could all really use them!
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
The Guest Room Pt. 6
He was not real sure what woke him but he wished it hadn't. Pain erupted through out his body all at once and he let out a strangled gasp. Only one eye opened the other eye felt like it was taped down, he felt like that should worry him but the pain kept that worry from actually reaching him. He used his one eye to look around and he deduced the world was skewed. He was in his car and it wasn't very comfortable the roof was too close, the front window was smashed and the dash seemed to be lower then it normally sat. Of course he was not so sure about that as he soon realized both of his arms were hanging up near his head. He moved his arm a little and let out a moan again as still more pain awakened in his body. He was upside down, this was bad. He started to feel panic. He called out for his wife "SARAH!"
"Hey! This guy's alive! Get those Jaws of Life over here now!" A gravelly authoritative voice barked out from somewhere above him. Every single word had brought a new shot of pain through his head but the meaning of the words drifted through. He tried to move but his body seemed pinned. A head appeared in the triangle of the bottom of his window, or would that be the top when the car is upside down? "Don't try to move. You've been here, unconscious and upside down for quite a while. I doubt your body will work correctly even if you aren't broken. Give us a few more minutes and we will get ya out of there."
The man who was talking to Joshua had a grey mustache and tired eyes. He had a brown uniform with a sparkly badge and his words had a soft drawl to them. The officer was able to portray a sense of compassion and strength. Joshua felt himself relax, as much as anyone hanging upside down in a car for hours could. He knew he could trust the man to get him out of here and to a hospital. The hydraulic tools were there suddenly and the men in uniform made quick work of the door, they placed a neck brace on him and got him out as gently and as quickly as they could. Within moments he was in the ambulance being secured. The EMT made quick work of getting him all plugged in and scanned as he asked questions. Name, Address and simple things like that. Joshua answered the questions but he did so slowly as if he was having to recall things from far away. Apparently Joshua had a decent cut above his left eye because the EMT spent a lot of time examining his forehead and carefully cleaning the area up. Joshua realized why the eye wouldn't open. The blood from the cut had stuck it shut, he hoped that was the only reason. The EMT was calm and efficient even amidst the jarring motion of the vehicle as it left the dirt road headed to the hospital.
Joshua was having a hard time connecting why he had been in his car upside down and where he was to how his life was usually running. He could not quite grasp what was missing and it bothered him. Overall he felt like something was supposed to be happening and felt overwhelmed with frustration that he was strapped to a gurney and heading to a hospital. The why he was frustrated and what was so urgent was where he kept stumbling. He had no idea. The lack of any short term memory was also frustrating for him. He then wondered where Sarah was and hoped she was OK. A thrill of panic went through him and he once again tried to move. The restraints held him in place and the EMT told him to relax. He wanted to tell the guy that he couldn't relax. He wanted to tell the guy that he needed to call his wife but something held his tongue. Some little voice told him not to mention Sarah again and he listened but he was not sure why. The ride continued but the EMT was not as frantic in his movements. Joshua assumed that he must be in stable enough condition and the Hospital must be a ways off. His guess was right, the ride took forever.
"Hey! This guy's alive! Get those Jaws of Life over here now!" A gravelly authoritative voice barked out from somewhere above him. Every single word had brought a new shot of pain through his head but the meaning of the words drifted through. He tried to move but his body seemed pinned. A head appeared in the triangle of the bottom of his window, or would that be the top when the car is upside down? "Don't try to move. You've been here, unconscious and upside down for quite a while. I doubt your body will work correctly even if you aren't broken. Give us a few more minutes and we will get ya out of there."
The man who was talking to Joshua had a grey mustache and tired eyes. He had a brown uniform with a sparkly badge and his words had a soft drawl to them. The officer was able to portray a sense of compassion and strength. Joshua felt himself relax, as much as anyone hanging upside down in a car for hours could. He knew he could trust the man to get him out of here and to a hospital. The hydraulic tools were there suddenly and the men in uniform made quick work of the door, they placed a neck brace on him and got him out as gently and as quickly as they could. Within moments he was in the ambulance being secured. The EMT made quick work of getting him all plugged in and scanned as he asked questions. Name, Address and simple things like that. Joshua answered the questions but he did so slowly as if he was having to recall things from far away. Apparently Joshua had a decent cut above his left eye because the EMT spent a lot of time examining his forehead and carefully cleaning the area up. Joshua realized why the eye wouldn't open. The blood from the cut had stuck it shut, he hoped that was the only reason. The EMT was calm and efficient even amidst the jarring motion of the vehicle as it left the dirt road headed to the hospital.
Joshua was having a hard time connecting why he had been in his car upside down and where he was to how his life was usually running. He could not quite grasp what was missing and it bothered him. Overall he felt like something was supposed to be happening and felt overwhelmed with frustration that he was strapped to a gurney and heading to a hospital. The why he was frustrated and what was so urgent was where he kept stumbling. He had no idea. The lack of any short term memory was also frustrating for him. He then wondered where Sarah was and hoped she was OK. A thrill of panic went through him and he once again tried to move. The restraints held him in place and the EMT told him to relax. He wanted to tell the guy that he couldn't relax. He wanted to tell the guy that he needed to call his wife but something held his tongue. Some little voice told him not to mention Sarah again and he listened but he was not sure why. The ride continued but the EMT was not as frantic in his movements. Joshua assumed that he must be in stable enough condition and the Hospital must be a ways off. His guess was right, the ride took forever.
My First Podcast
Hey this is the first podcast and I hope it works. Give it a try.
If you see nothing to click it is due to technical difficulties on my part.
Try this link.... http://feeds2.feedburner.com/CrazedLunatiksBlog
It is an mp3 and should play on itunes and other music players on your computer. So download it and it should play on any audio player you use.
Let me know what you think and if it works....
If you see nothing to click it is due to technical difficulties on my part.
Try this link.... http://feeds2.feedburner.com/CrazedLunatiksBlog
It is an mp3 and should play on itunes and other music players on your computer. So download it and it should play on any audio player you use.
Let me know what you think and if it works....
Tuesday, March 03, 2009
A Rambling Review of Synecdoche, New York
Do you ever go see a movie people recommend to you that you just.... Ya know? It's not that you didn't like it.... well it's kinda that you didn't like it. You also kinda liked parts of it but overall it left you feeling odd, disconnected and unsure of what you just paid for? This movie was kind of like the "free drink" in Vegas for gamblers.... those drinks always cost me like 40 bucks! Those "free drinks" are rarely ever worth it.
Without further ado..... here is my review of Synecdoche, New York.
I am not sure what to make of what I just saw. There are a lot of factors we need to consider here. I had an extremely long (but good) day, after a hard night of nearly restless sleep. Then why did I go? Well I joined a Meetup group (meetup.com) based around seeing films. I had not been to an event yet mainly due to schedule conflicts or lack of interest; for example they had a showing of some movie staring Renee Zellwegger and I would almost rather have 12 root canals on the same day then see her in another freaking movie. (I loathe her!) Anyway this one was a Meetup I could make and carried the bonus of several movie selections (albeit all possible selections were not really my speed). When I got home from teaching today, I melted in to my recliner and almost never made it back up. By the time I got to the theater the movie was about to start. I watched the movie and actually ordered food and a couple pints (Living Room Theaters). I am not sure who the Meetup people were nor was I sure if we met up after the movie or not. I felt a little insecure asking people that I thought might be part of the group. Either way I had decided I was seeing a movie this day and had, as a result, not went to any other movie prior to this one. So I watched a movie mainly because I really wanted to see a movie.
I guess I should review the movie now.... it's just that the movie left me not feeling like doing anything. How weird is it to laugh while slowly falling into a depressive state. This movie seems to carry the moniker of "Tragicomedy" in the other reviews I have read. For some odd reason I kept expecting the movie to start making sense or have a good ending but it just kept on trucking along being a hugely surreal downer. The surrealness is really where the humor comes in, most of the humor stemmed from the odd flow. I think people enjoyed the oddness of the movie but why make such a downer? Really?
I am done attempting to review this movie..... I just don't get it. It was not my favorite. I could definitely have lived without ever watching it. As far as the actors.... they seemed good and I bought the surrealness of their characters. The story was often confusing (due to the main character's loose hold on time) and it all started to seem long about 30 minutes before it ended. I think really it was the last 45 minutes that killed the movie for me. Until then I was kind of thinking the movie might still do something. It never does by the way.... My recommendation? See it if you like odd and off the wall flicks. Especially if you are not as bothered by downers. Don't see the movie if you want to laugh and have a good time....
Without further ado..... here is my review of Synecdoche, New York.
I am not sure what to make of what I just saw. There are a lot of factors we need to consider here. I had an extremely long (but good) day, after a hard night of nearly restless sleep. Then why did I go? Well I joined a Meetup group (meetup.com) based around seeing films. I had not been to an event yet mainly due to schedule conflicts or lack of interest; for example they had a showing of some movie staring Renee Zellwegger and I would almost rather have 12 root canals on the same day then see her in another freaking movie. (I loathe her!) Anyway this one was a Meetup I could make and carried the bonus of several movie selections (albeit all possible selections were not really my speed). When I got home from teaching today, I melted in to my recliner and almost never made it back up. By the time I got to the theater the movie was about to start. I watched the movie and actually ordered food and a couple pints (Living Room Theaters). I am not sure who the Meetup people were nor was I sure if we met up after the movie or not. I felt a little insecure asking people that I thought might be part of the group. Either way I had decided I was seeing a movie this day and had, as a result, not went to any other movie prior to this one. So I watched a movie mainly because I really wanted to see a movie.
I guess I should review the movie now.... it's just that the movie left me not feeling like doing anything. How weird is it to laugh while slowly falling into a depressive state. This movie seems to carry the moniker of "Tragicomedy" in the other reviews I have read. For some odd reason I kept expecting the movie to start making sense or have a good ending but it just kept on trucking along being a hugely surreal downer. The surrealness is really where the humor comes in, most of the humor stemmed from the odd flow. I think people enjoyed the oddness of the movie but why make such a downer? Really?
I am done attempting to review this movie..... I just don't get it. It was not my favorite. I could definitely have lived without ever watching it. As far as the actors.... they seemed good and I bought the surrealness of their characters. The story was often confusing (due to the main character's loose hold on time) and it all started to seem long about 30 minutes before it ended. I think really it was the last 45 minutes that killed the movie for me. Until then I was kind of thinking the movie might still do something. It never does by the way.... My recommendation? See it if you like odd and off the wall flicks. Especially if you are not as bothered by downers. Don't see the movie if you want to laugh and have a good time....
Monday, March 02, 2009
Business Week Thinks I Am Unhappy.... :(
Today was going splendidly. I woke up and read a little, for pleasure and not for school related reasons. I sat there reading this marginally decent book (by choice) and sipped coffee. I was relaxed and in a pretty decent mood. Soon it was time for me to get my rear in gear. I packed the car with equipment for today's science lesson and headed out to Gresham. Once out there I treated myself to something I hadn't had in years, El Pollo Loco. There are only two up this way and neither of them are close enough to be a real dining possibility. However, it is close to where I work on Mondays and so I decided to eat there instead of at home today. I enjoyed my tasty lunch while mentally preparing for my science lesson. I still had plenty of time so I put a larger dent in the book I was reading. 15 minutes before it was time to be at the school, I left for the school, set up the lesson and taught the lesson. It went well. There were some squirrelly kids but overall they enjoyed their time and learned a few things. Then I got in my car and I heard distressing news. I was shocked, I was scared, and I was confused.
On the radio I heard a distressing story. Business Week in all their awesomeness has decided that of all the locales in the US that Portlanders are the most emotionally damaged. Apparently my general good feeling was merely a false positive.... I was unhappy. The news was hard to take. I sat in my car and drove home under a cloud of despair.... on a sunny day. It was tragic.... I am currently learning how hard typing from a fetal position is. It is freaking tough!
The worst thing about this was thinking of all the fake smiles and false happiness I encountered the last few months. I was so glad Business Week set me straight.... the hotline I am calling has me on hold. I figured, since the all knowing people at Business Week not only told me that I live in the land of unhappiness but also included a national suicide hotline number in the story, that the least I could do was call! I was not sure what to do when I reached a person unfortunately, having just become aware of my eternal loss of happy. I am not sure how to act as Business Week did not really clearly tell me how I was feeling so I am not sure how to confess my depression. I am going to write out the conversation for you guys and hope it helps fellow sad Portlandians!
PSA - Depression and suicide are not funny things.... If you are having a rough time make a call to a hotline or a caring friend. We really do want you to hang in there :) THE MORE YOU KNOW!
PS on the PSA - I am making fun of Business Week in this post... I have yet to meet anyone who actually subscribes to this rag. Those who do must be pretty boring people. What kind of a business article focuses on the 20 Unhappiest Cities??? Stupid. Blow it out your a... elbow Business Week!
On the radio I heard a distressing story. Business Week in all their awesomeness has decided that of all the locales in the US that Portlanders are the most emotionally damaged. Apparently my general good feeling was merely a false positive.... I was unhappy. The news was hard to take. I sat in my car and drove home under a cloud of despair.... on a sunny day. It was tragic.... I am currently learning how hard typing from a fetal position is. It is freaking tough!
The worst thing about this was thinking of all the fake smiles and false happiness I encountered the last few months. I was so glad Business Week set me straight.... the hotline I am calling has me on hold. I figured, since the all knowing people at Business Week not only told me that I live in the land of unhappiness but also included a national suicide hotline number in the story, that the least I could do was call! I was not sure what to do when I reached a person unfortunately, having just become aware of my eternal loss of happy. I am not sure how to act as Business Week did not really clearly tell me how I was feeling so I am not sure how to confess my depression. I am going to write out the conversation for you guys and hope it helps fellow sad Portlandians!
Hello Sad People Hotline!
Yeah... uh hi.
Hello, can I have your name?
It's Mike. What's yours?
Joan of Arc
You were on the Ark? Like Noah's?
No sir. Can you tell me the nature of your problem?
I was kind of hoping you could help me out with that.
Sir, this is not a place to call for jokes...
No! Wait let me explain! I live in Portland!
Portland! Holy HEYSEUSS! Why didn't you say so!? You are very valuable to society, things will get better! The sun will come out soon! You should take a happy vacation! Call your friends and Family! Stay on the phone and talk! Keep your head out of the oven! Don't do it! Unload the weapon! Put the pills down! Call 911! OH my! WHY AREN'T YOU SAYING ANYTHING TO ME MARK??!!?!?!
Uh... it's actually Mike. Not Mark.
Mark! Thank goodness you're still there! I want you to listen to me! Just because Portland is rainy is not a reason for you to die! Please don't do it!
OK. Do what exactly? You see I am confused...
Of course! It is very confusing but you have a lot to give to society! DON'T DO IT! YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR!!!!
Hey Ms. Of Arc? Can I tell you my thinking here? Or do you think constantly interrupting a Portlander on such a day as this is good practice?
I would love to listen. Go ahead and start talking Mark.
My name isn't Mark but OK. So I was feeling pretty good today...
Sure! Lot's of people feel a roller coaster of emotions during hard times! Hang in there Mark!
Uh... yeah. About that. I still feel pretty good but I heard that Portland is the Unhappiest City and I was worried that I didn't fit in here. I feel like I am "trapped in a glass case of emotion" right now but they are pretty happy emotions. I like Portland and would hate to be kicked out, because I insist on having a positive demeanor, to a place like Delaware that had no cities on this list. Which I don't see as being possible considering how lame Delaware sounds... I mean has anyone actually ever admitted to being from Delaware? Of course it could be worse and I could be in New Mexico.... I hate New Mexico. I was looking at this list and I definitely agree with some of the names on the list.... try as they might people who live in Tucson, AZ know Tucson sucks. Jacksonville, FL? Boo! Sacramento? Yeah... NEXT! Las Vegas? Being stuck there for more then a weekend is a depressing thought. But Portland I just don't get, and where the heck are the Delaware and New Mexico cities?
I completely agree that Portland seems out of place on that list Mark.... but it was a Business Week survey! I mean we are talking Business Week!
I know. I know. So that is where you come in. Obviously I am in denial here so what should I do?
Take it one day at a time Mark. You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there ya have... the facts of life. In fact, why don't you call back in every day through this tough period in your life. Everyday at this time, OK?
Gee Joan! You are so freaking helpful! Thank goodness for Business Week's awesome reporting! With out them I would never have met someone who knew Noah! Bye! -click-
PSA - Depression and suicide are not funny things.... If you are having a rough time make a call to a hotline or a caring friend. We really do want you to hang in there :) THE MORE YOU KNOW!
PS on the PSA - I am making fun of Business Week in this post... I have yet to meet anyone who actually subscribes to this rag. Those who do must be pretty boring people. What kind of a business article focuses on the 20 Unhappiest Cities??? Stupid. Blow it out your a... elbow Business Week!
Saturday, February 28, 2009
The Guest room Pt. 5 - A Story
It was a few hours into his drive that the text message came in. The text said "It's about time" and that was it. Joshua knew what that meant. It meant his friend, Dave, was in. He was in all the way, no matter where this journey took them. Joshua felt a little tension in his shoulders release about the same time his stomach began to churn. He effectively traded one type of stress (having to do this on his own) for another type of stress, this tie this one made his stomach upset. He had no idea what he would find in Santa Fe. He might find nothing at all, perhaps he had let Sarah's trail get too cold. Perhaps even Dave, a man who made a living from finding those no one else could, wouldn't be able to discover what really happened to Sarah. He pushed those ideas to the back of his head, he didn't have time for them now. The wheel was in motion and he had already pushed all his chips in. The only thing to do was to ride it out and see what came up.
Joshua realized his mind was getting too far ahead of him. In a move he hadn't made in a year, he reached into the side door panel for his CD case. He flipped through the discs until he found a good road trip album. Willie Nelson's Greatest Hits, the first song was 'On The Road Again". It seemed fitting somehow. He let the twang of the guitar and the comfortable swagger of Willie coax his mind away from the tough topics and back to the road ahead of him.
------------------------------------------------
He was nearly at the Arizona Border when fatigue hit him. He was miles away from a gas station or a rest stop. He had to stop anyway, he had pushed an hour past when he first started feeling fatigued. He had fallen asleep for an undetermined period of time a few moments before and only the sound as he slowly drifted off the road woke him up. The loud noise those grooves made scared him awake for a few minutes but he was starting to fade again. It was a mile until an exit for a road headed in another direction was available. He would take the exit and look for a place to sleep. He only had to make it a mile. He dug his nails into the palm of his hand to stay awake.
--------------------------
The car was still moving when his eyes flashed open again but he was no longer on asphalt. He was confused for a moment but slowly his brain warned him to apply the brakes. He had to stop but in his slightly increasing panic he hit them to hard. The car was soon out of control. He was now wide awake as he watched his car begin to slide sideways right towards a drainage ditch. He tried to steer out of the spin but the car was no longer heeding his direction and the car continued sliding sideways. He felt the car lurch forward and the slide became a roll. The car was way past out of control and he knew he was going to die. Suddenly the car stopped rolling and the stop was abrupt, painfully so. His face was introduced to an airbag and something else, a hot wave of pain shot through his body right before things went black.
Joshua realized his mind was getting too far ahead of him. In a move he hadn't made in a year, he reached into the side door panel for his CD case. He flipped through the discs until he found a good road trip album. Willie Nelson's Greatest Hits, the first song was 'On The Road Again". It seemed fitting somehow. He let the twang of the guitar and the comfortable swagger of Willie coax his mind away from the tough topics and back to the road ahead of him.
------------------------------------------------
He was nearly at the Arizona Border when fatigue hit him. He was miles away from a gas station or a rest stop. He had to stop anyway, he had pushed an hour past when he first started feeling fatigued. He had fallen asleep for an undetermined period of time a few moments before and only the sound as he slowly drifted off the road woke him up. The loud noise those grooves made scared him awake for a few minutes but he was starting to fade again. It was a mile until an exit for a road headed in another direction was available. He would take the exit and look for a place to sleep. He only had to make it a mile. He dug his nails into the palm of his hand to stay awake.
--------------------------
The car was still moving when his eyes flashed open again but he was no longer on asphalt. He was confused for a moment but slowly his brain warned him to apply the brakes. He had to stop but in his slightly increasing panic he hit them to hard. The car was soon out of control. He was now wide awake as he watched his car begin to slide sideways right towards a drainage ditch. He tried to steer out of the spin but the car was no longer heeding his direction and the car continued sliding sideways. He felt the car lurch forward and the slide became a roll. The car was way past out of control and he knew he was going to die. Suddenly the car stopped rolling and the stop was abrupt, painfully so. His face was introduced to an airbag and something else, a hot wave of pain shot through his body right before things went black.
Monday, February 23, 2009
A Rambling Review of Fired Up!
Some times you think you are getting the 5th installment and you are. Sometimes you think you are getting the fifth installment and your dreams come crashing down. The Guest Room is on Winter Hiatus.... I learned this term from watching TV.
Today we will bring you a review! I wanted to go to the beer theater, I really did. Unfortunately all they had were movies I had seen and movies I am not real kicked in the pants excited about. So I decided not to see a movie. I was humbly sitting here in my apartment staring at the wall, it was a very exciting wall. Then I decided to get online and check my email.... for the 70th time this weekend. You never call, you never write... but I digress.
That was when inspiration struck. I saw an ad about cheerleaders and two guys that want to get to know cheerleaders. I rushed over to the movie listings and saw the movie was playing at the theater on the other side of the tracks. So I grabbed my switchblade, my lucky strikes and my leather jacket and I tough danced my way to the theater! I was walking, I was was walking! I was going to see the movie Fired Up!
This movie did not do it for a good majority of the movie critics out there. Most of them used words like tepid, tired, and cheap imitation. They also used words like rampant misogyny and bikini-clad babes. If this was not a sign that this movie was destined to be seen by me then nothing is. I hate critics, my two loyal fans know that. Their tepid, tired and cheap imitation responses are what made me feel like a bikini-clad babe! Wait... a brunette in the third row? A rampant misogynist? Oh crap! I have no idea what their stupid reviews made me feel besides the urge to see the movie. I went because they told me not to bother.
I am glad I did. I was in a theater with maybe three other people while a line waited outside for Coraline. OUTSIDE! In the rain and cold! ARE YOU FREAKING INSANE! I can't even wait at a crowded restaurant or a hot club filled with adorable girls, I sure is heck am not waiting outside for a freaking movie about a puppet. So anyway I was in the theater with maybe three other people. Which meant that I had a primo spot, the better to fill the room with my boisterous laughter. Which I did on several occasions. I have no idea if people around me enjoyed this movie but I did.
What is this movie about? Two star football players have the run of the school and all the ladies within. Then they find out that their football camp will take place in Texas this year instead of the beaches of Florida. This is a crisis of mega stupendous proportions, these two do not want to go and sweat out the summer with a bunch of guys with no women in sight. So while they lament there misfortune they stumble on to every heterosexual man's fantasy. Even if the man sitting next to you denies this fantasy, because maybe he never really gave it much thought, realize that if he gives it much thought he would be on board with this fantasy. The fantsy of infiltrating a cheerleader camp to make out with cheerleaders. Of course the head cheerleader at their school is actually not stupid and recognizes these two are up to something right away. Sadly that does not matter nor does it stop them joining the team and heading to cheerleading camp. (The scene where they get out of going to football camp was great.) While at camp the two guys begin running their game until one of them realizes he actuallly only has eyes for the head cheerleader. Unfortunately, she has a boyfriend who is secretly a jerk, although he isn't very secretive about it. Somewhere along the way the guy realizes he likes the girl enough to stop playing the field and both football jocks realize they kind of like cheerleading.... This is not a Whodunit, there are no plot twists. This is a straight up "men are scum, then one scumbag falls in love, wishes he wasn't scum, gets caught in his scummy plan and is told to leave, he leaves but secretly doesn't want to, then he and his scum friend have a heart to heart and decide they actually like said thing that scum plan was based around, they go back, scum guy with a heart redeems himself from scumdom at the last minute and gets the girl in the end" story. A typical teen comedy that manages to make fun of cheerleaders, cheerleader movies, and football players. Yeah so this is not breaking new ground, but it's funny. It really was, I was constantly laughing at little random things that happened. I liked what they did, I liked what happened and I just let the movie roll, unchecked. I don't feel like a better person for having seen this movie. I do not understand more about humanity. I am not affected by a random cause to near action. I saw a movie I had a good laugh and I wrote a review. Who doesn't need a good laugh?
The particulars: This is billed as a teen sex comedy. Which means that there is a lot of innuendo and people in underwear. There was no nudity, no drug use, no blood and guts. Just a little foul language, lingerie and sex jokes.
Today we will bring you a review! I wanted to go to the beer theater, I really did. Unfortunately all they had were movies I had seen and movies I am not real kicked in the pants excited about. So I decided not to see a movie. I was humbly sitting here in my apartment staring at the wall, it was a very exciting wall. Then I decided to get online and check my email.... for the 70th time this weekend. You never call, you never write... but I digress.
That was when inspiration struck. I saw an ad about cheerleaders and two guys that want to get to know cheerleaders. I rushed over to the movie listings and saw the movie was playing at the theater on the other side of the tracks. So I grabbed my switchblade, my lucky strikes and my leather jacket and I tough danced my way to the theater! I was walking, I was was walking! I was going to see the movie Fired Up!
This movie did not do it for a good majority of the movie critics out there. Most of them used words like tepid, tired, and cheap imitation. They also used words like rampant misogyny and bikini-clad babes. If this was not a sign that this movie was destined to be seen by me then nothing is. I hate critics, my two loyal fans know that. Their tepid, tired and cheap imitation responses are what made me feel like a bikini-clad babe! Wait... a brunette in the third row? A rampant misogynist? Oh crap! I have no idea what their stupid reviews made me feel besides the urge to see the movie. I went because they told me not to bother.
I am glad I did. I was in a theater with maybe three other people while a line waited outside for Coraline. OUTSIDE! In the rain and cold! ARE YOU FREAKING INSANE! I can't even wait at a crowded restaurant or a hot club filled with adorable girls, I sure is heck am not waiting outside for a freaking movie about a puppet. So anyway I was in the theater with maybe three other people. Which meant that I had a primo spot, the better to fill the room with my boisterous laughter. Which I did on several occasions. I have no idea if people around me enjoyed this movie but I did.
What is this movie about? Two star football players have the run of the school and all the ladies within. Then they find out that their football camp will take place in Texas this year instead of the beaches of Florida. This is a crisis of mega stupendous proportions, these two do not want to go and sweat out the summer with a bunch of guys with no women in sight. So while they lament there misfortune they stumble on to every heterosexual man's fantasy. Even if the man sitting next to you denies this fantasy, because maybe he never really gave it much thought, realize that if he gives it much thought he would be on board with this fantasy. The fantsy of infiltrating a cheerleader camp to make out with cheerleaders. Of course the head cheerleader at their school is actually not stupid and recognizes these two are up to something right away. Sadly that does not matter nor does it stop them joining the team and heading to cheerleading camp. (The scene where they get out of going to football camp was great.) While at camp the two guys begin running their game until one of them realizes he actuallly only has eyes for the head cheerleader. Unfortunately, she has a boyfriend who is secretly a jerk, although he isn't very secretive about it. Somewhere along the way the guy realizes he likes the girl enough to stop playing the field and both football jocks realize they kind of like cheerleading.... This is not a Whodunit, there are no plot twists. This is a straight up "men are scum, then one scumbag falls in love, wishes he wasn't scum, gets caught in his scummy plan and is told to leave, he leaves but secretly doesn't want to, then he and his scum friend have a heart to heart and decide they actually like said thing that scum plan was based around, they go back, scum guy with a heart redeems himself from scumdom at the last minute and gets the girl in the end" story. A typical teen comedy that manages to make fun of cheerleaders, cheerleader movies, and football players. Yeah so this is not breaking new ground, but it's funny. It really was, I was constantly laughing at little random things that happened. I liked what they did, I liked what happened and I just let the movie roll, unchecked. I don't feel like a better person for having seen this movie. I do not understand more about humanity. I am not affected by a random cause to near action. I saw a movie I had a good laugh and I wrote a review. Who doesn't need a good laugh?
The particulars: This is billed as a teen sex comedy. Which means that there is a lot of innuendo and people in underwear. There was no nudity, no drug use, no blood and guts. Just a little foul language, lingerie and sex jokes.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
The Guest Room Pt. 4 - A Short Story
Joshua awoke at a random rest stop along the I-5 corridor. He had fallen asleep in the passenger seat with the seat cranked as flat as possible. Resulting in a better rest then he had the day before in this same car. There was no crick in his neck this time, although he was a little stiff and needed to stretch. Of course he would need to use the restroom before he hit the road and would get the chance to stretch then. He grabbed his overnight bag, he wanted to brush his teeth and freshen up a bit. The sun was just barely coming up over the mountains and it was that light that had awoke him. He stretched as he exited the car, it felt good to stretch.
After he washed his hands and while he was brushing his teeth, Joshua reviewed the last 24 hours. This time yesterday he had been headed to his job. Then he had went on the crying jag, which was because he finally accepted the fact that his wife was missing and had been gone for a year. When he had been able to drive again, he went home and packed clothes, toiletries and all the food in his house that required no cooking or refrigeration. He loaded all this stuff into his car before heading over to the nosy elderly couple next door. When Sarah had went missing Bob and Ellie had been over every day with casseroles or cakes. They were full of good will and even better intentions but they definitely overstepped a lot of bounds. He had found them infuriating before Sarah had disappeared but had learned to accept them and their quirks after. They wouldn't leave him alone, no matter what he said to them, and he had said some nasty things to a lot of people right after Sarah had went missing. One day when he felt the urge to throw them out of his house he realized they were just being good neighbors and Joshua had to stop fighting with them. His visit to them was so they he was going to New Mexico, to pursue all the leads he ever heard about the case. He explained he needed to know what really happened to Sarah so he could start to take the steps necessary to rebuild his life without her. Bob had patted him on the back and told him things like "Finally! I've been telling you to do just that!" (even though he hadn't) and "You go down and you crack some heads if you need too!" To which Ellie said "Bob! Joshua is not a violent man and he does not need you telling him to be violent!" After that died down they promised to watch the house for him. Ellie assured him that she would handle Sarah's plants as well, Joshua had smiled and thanked her. He had not realized there were any plants left around his house but on his way to the car he saw his lawn was well maintained, through no action of his own. Bob and Ellie were definitely caring people.
He waved goodbye to them as he drove off. They were waving at him long past the point were he could still see them but he had seen them do it to other people before, it was just their thing. He hit the freeway and had put a few hours down before he called his office. He was patched through to the owner, it was a small office. The owner had been after him to take time off after Sarah disappeared and he responded well to the news that Joshua was doing just that. Joshua neglected to tell him where he was going and what he was planning to do. His boss might not think it was such a good idea and try to talk him out of it. He was not in the mood for that. The owner told him to take as much time as he needed and that they would still have a job for him when he got back. He had thanked the boss and had meant it. Even though he was not sure he would ever have enough time to heal. He also was not sure he ever wanted to go back but he shut his mouth and played the game.
He had driven for several hours after that, stopping only for fuel and a drop in at In-n-Out Burgers, his favorite chain burger joint. When his eyelids had become heavy he pulled into a rest stop, grabbed a blanket and had made himself comfortable in the passenger seat.
Joshua shook the water from his toothbrush before putting it away. He splashed water on his face and applied a new smear of deodorant. He looked in the mirror, the first time in a year and was startled by how old he looked. He was kind of grey looking too. No wonder people kept asking him how he was doing. He ran his hand across the stubble on his chin before heading to the vending machines outside. He needed a cup of coffee before he hit the road. His next stop would be around Bakersfield or perhaps a little further East. He had chose to drive this route because he planned to stop in Flagstaff, AZ on his way to New Mexico. He had a friend he needed to see, some one he hoped would help. If nothing else he could spend a night or two there, and pick that same friends brain a little. That friend had introduced Sarah and Joshua back in there collegiate days. He had been a man of many connections and new a lot of people all over the place. Joshua was hoping some of those connections might tap into Santa Fe.... his destination. He sent a text message alerting his friend that he would be there in a day or two. With that complete and armed with the coffee and a Nutrigrain bar he headed back to the highway and applied his foot to the gas pedal.
After he washed his hands and while he was brushing his teeth, Joshua reviewed the last 24 hours. This time yesterday he had been headed to his job. Then he had went on the crying jag, which was because he finally accepted the fact that his wife was missing and had been gone for a year. When he had been able to drive again, he went home and packed clothes, toiletries and all the food in his house that required no cooking or refrigeration. He loaded all this stuff into his car before heading over to the nosy elderly couple next door. When Sarah had went missing Bob and Ellie had been over every day with casseroles or cakes. They were full of good will and even better intentions but they definitely overstepped a lot of bounds. He had found them infuriating before Sarah had disappeared but had learned to accept them and their quirks after. They wouldn't leave him alone, no matter what he said to them, and he had said some nasty things to a lot of people right after Sarah had went missing. One day when he felt the urge to throw them out of his house he realized they were just being good neighbors and Joshua had to stop fighting with them. His visit to them was so they he was going to New Mexico, to pursue all the leads he ever heard about the case. He explained he needed to know what really happened to Sarah so he could start to take the steps necessary to rebuild his life without her. Bob had patted him on the back and told him things like "Finally! I've been telling you to do just that!" (even though he hadn't) and "You go down and you crack some heads if you need too!" To which Ellie said "Bob! Joshua is not a violent man and he does not need you telling him to be violent!" After that died down they promised to watch the house for him. Ellie assured him that she would handle Sarah's plants as well, Joshua had smiled and thanked her. He had not realized there were any plants left around his house but on his way to the car he saw his lawn was well maintained, through no action of his own. Bob and Ellie were definitely caring people.
He waved goodbye to them as he drove off. They were waving at him long past the point were he could still see them but he had seen them do it to other people before, it was just their thing. He hit the freeway and had put a few hours down before he called his office. He was patched through to the owner, it was a small office. The owner had been after him to take time off after Sarah disappeared and he responded well to the news that Joshua was doing just that. Joshua neglected to tell him where he was going and what he was planning to do. His boss might not think it was such a good idea and try to talk him out of it. He was not in the mood for that. The owner told him to take as much time as he needed and that they would still have a job for him when he got back. He had thanked the boss and had meant it. Even though he was not sure he would ever have enough time to heal. He also was not sure he ever wanted to go back but he shut his mouth and played the game.
He had driven for several hours after that, stopping only for fuel and a drop in at In-n-Out Burgers, his favorite chain burger joint. When his eyelids had become heavy he pulled into a rest stop, grabbed a blanket and had made himself comfortable in the passenger seat.
Joshua shook the water from his toothbrush before putting it away. He splashed water on his face and applied a new smear of deodorant. He looked in the mirror, the first time in a year and was startled by how old he looked. He was kind of grey looking too. No wonder people kept asking him how he was doing. He ran his hand across the stubble on his chin before heading to the vending machines outside. He needed a cup of coffee before he hit the road. His next stop would be around Bakersfield or perhaps a little further East. He had chose to drive this route because he planned to stop in Flagstaff, AZ on his way to New Mexico. He had a friend he needed to see, some one he hoped would help. If nothing else he could spend a night or two there, and pick that same friends brain a little. That friend had introduced Sarah and Joshua back in there collegiate days. He had been a man of many connections and new a lot of people all over the place. Joshua was hoping some of those connections might tap into Santa Fe.... his destination. He sent a text message alerting his friend that he would be there in a day or two. With that complete and armed with the coffee and a Nutrigrain bar he headed back to the highway and applied his foot to the gas pedal.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
The Guest Room Pt. 3 - A Short Story
This is the third part of the story.... hence the words Pt. 3 in the title of this post. If you need the hook up on the first part click here: http://crazedlunatikdesigns.blogspot.com/2009/02/guest-room-pt-1-short-story.html
If you read the first part but need to read the second part, then click here: http://crazedlunatikdesigns.blogspot.com/2009/02/guest-room-pt-2-short-story.html
Joshua felt a bone aching sadness sweep over him and was having a hard time seeing through the tears that continued to fall. He was crying so hard that he couldn't even breathe. It had been a long time since he had felt anything. The last time he had felt anything it had been shock, that was a year ago, when she had disappeared unexpectedly. He never allowed himself to cry about it until it snuck up on him today. When the shock, from her loss, had worn away, he had felt numb all over and the numbness had kept him insolated. Insolated from the pain of his missing wife, pain from a system that failed him and the realization that he was powerless to change any of it.
He realized that he needed to stop driving 60 miles an hour and get some place he could stop. He began merging to the right so he could get off the freeway. He was in between the suburb he lived in and the ciy he worked at, the exit he took was surrounded by farm land. He pulled into an old gas station lot just left of the off ramp, a station that had been sitting vacant for years. The cement was cracked and looked more like a puzzle needing to be put back together. In the asphalt's numerus cracks grass had sprung up. Rust ate away at every metal object. Nature was slowly reclaiming this forgotten spot, it looked like a set to an after armageddon movie. Where the world had ended and without human maintenance the buildings and roads began to fall into decay. The windows of the station had been boarded up and graffiti and flyers covered the building. He turned off his car and let his grief wash over him.
After a long period of crying, exhaustion crept in and he found his eyes closing... sleep enveloped him. The tortured sleep he usually experienced did not nag at him this time. Instead he felt and saw only blackness, his sleep was devoid of dreams and he fell deeper in.
---------------------------------
He awoke with an aching crick in his neck from the odd angle he had slept in. He massaged his neck while his brain began piecing things back together for him. He realized he needed to call his job at some point and tell them why he hadn't made it in... or at least to make an excuse. He knew that was a call he should make immediately but he did not bother to grab his mobile phone. He had no desire to call them at the moment. He barely felt like moving. He stared at the boarded up gas station in front of him. Studying the old posters for upcoming rodeos and monster truck shows. He wondered why anyone would plaster fliers here, a place no one had any need to go to any more. Except for today, he needed a place to have his breakdown. A place where no one would knock on his window concerned for his welfare or to tell him to keep moving. This had been kismet.
He felt the urge get out of the car and move around. It would help to awaken his joints and also allow him to stretch. He had been in a strange position for a few hours judging by how high the sun was in the sky. He resisted the urge to look at his phone. He was not ready to get back to the world he had been hiding in. For the first time in a while Joshua felt awake. He knew what had to be done and in what order. The thing farthest down on the list was checking in with work and knowing what time it was. That world no longer existed. He had things to settle and scores to even. Of course the first thing on his list was to relieve his bladder. When that was taken care of he could take the next step.... driving to New Mexico. The last spot anyone had ever seen Sarah.
If you read the first part but need to read the second part, then click here: http://crazedlunatikdesigns.blogspot.com/2009/02/guest-room-pt-2-short-story.html
Joshua felt a bone aching sadness sweep over him and was having a hard time seeing through the tears that continued to fall. He was crying so hard that he couldn't even breathe. It had been a long time since he had felt anything. The last time he had felt anything it had been shock, that was a year ago, when she had disappeared unexpectedly. He never allowed himself to cry about it until it snuck up on him today. When the shock, from her loss, had worn away, he had felt numb all over and the numbness had kept him insolated. Insolated from the pain of his missing wife, pain from a system that failed him and the realization that he was powerless to change any of it.
He realized that he needed to stop driving 60 miles an hour and get some place he could stop. He began merging to the right so he could get off the freeway. He was in between the suburb he lived in and the ciy he worked at, the exit he took was surrounded by farm land. He pulled into an old gas station lot just left of the off ramp, a station that had been sitting vacant for years. The cement was cracked and looked more like a puzzle needing to be put back together. In the asphalt's numerus cracks grass had sprung up. Rust ate away at every metal object. Nature was slowly reclaiming this forgotten spot, it looked like a set to an after armageddon movie. Where the world had ended and without human maintenance the buildings and roads began to fall into decay. The windows of the station had been boarded up and graffiti and flyers covered the building. He turned off his car and let his grief wash over him.
After a long period of crying, exhaustion crept in and he found his eyes closing... sleep enveloped him. The tortured sleep he usually experienced did not nag at him this time. Instead he felt and saw only blackness, his sleep was devoid of dreams and he fell deeper in.
---------------------------------
He awoke with an aching crick in his neck from the odd angle he had slept in. He massaged his neck while his brain began piecing things back together for him. He realized he needed to call his job at some point and tell them why he hadn't made it in... or at least to make an excuse. He knew that was a call he should make immediately but he did not bother to grab his mobile phone. He had no desire to call them at the moment. He barely felt like moving. He stared at the boarded up gas station in front of him. Studying the old posters for upcoming rodeos and monster truck shows. He wondered why anyone would plaster fliers here, a place no one had any need to go to any more. Except for today, he needed a place to have his breakdown. A place where no one would knock on his window concerned for his welfare or to tell him to keep moving. This had been kismet.
He felt the urge get out of the car and move around. It would help to awaken his joints and also allow him to stretch. He had been in a strange position for a few hours judging by how high the sun was in the sky. He resisted the urge to look at his phone. He was not ready to get back to the world he had been hiding in. For the first time in a while Joshua felt awake. He knew what had to be done and in what order. The thing farthest down on the list was checking in with work and knowing what time it was. That world no longer existed. He had things to settle and scores to even. Of course the first thing on his list was to relieve his bladder. When that was taken care of he could take the next step.... driving to New Mexico. The last spot anyone had ever seen Sarah.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
The Guest Room Pt. 2 - a short story
*****This is the 2nd part of a story, reading these sections in order is advised. Take me to the first part of the story!******
In what seemed to be only a moment later, the alarm jarred him uncermoniously back to consciousness. He was still exhausted but he had obligations. With a deep, heavy, soul bearing sigh, Joshua got up from the bed. It was still dark outside, daylight savings time... he sighed again. He shuffled in his house slippers to the coffee pot and started measuring the ingredients. Several heaping coffee grounds scoops into it he realized he had no clue how many were actually in the machine. He had been too tired to count. His coffee would either peel the paint off the walls or be nicely heated brown water. Either way he needed to get in the shower as his time was rapidly being sucked away.
The warm water flowing over him was not helping him wake up but it was warming him up. The shower felt good this morning, soothing somehow. He closed his eyes and leaned against the wall as the water fell on him. He saw her face again... and his eyes shot open. He turned off the water and stepped out to towel off. He had already decided to skip shaving today, his employer would have to deal with the scruff. He dressed in the mirror fogged bathroom, never bothering to check his appearance or even glance in the mirror's direction. He knew what he looked like, a zombie, and a hair style or a shave would not change that.
He poured the coffee into the commuter cup, grabbed the work he had brought home to fill his night with and headed out to his car. Traffic was always a nightmare when he headed to work. He used to listen to books on tape and had even been trying to learn Japanese for a trip he and Sarah had planned for Japan. He no longer bothered with that stuff, he didn't even listen to the radio. Instead, he sat in the car for almost an hour listening to the sounds his car made, secretly hoping that the sounds were actually a bigger problem that could keep him from work. In his haze of bad thoughts and pointless dreams he suddenly remembered it had been a year ago today. Sarah had disappeared unexpectedly one year ago today. The tears finally began to fall, she was really gone.
In what seemed to be only a moment later, the alarm jarred him uncermoniously back to consciousness. He was still exhausted but he had obligations. With a deep, heavy, soul bearing sigh, Joshua got up from the bed. It was still dark outside, daylight savings time... he sighed again. He shuffled in his house slippers to the coffee pot and started measuring the ingredients. Several heaping coffee grounds scoops into it he realized he had no clue how many were actually in the machine. He had been too tired to count. His coffee would either peel the paint off the walls or be nicely heated brown water. Either way he needed to get in the shower as his time was rapidly being sucked away.
The warm water flowing over him was not helping him wake up but it was warming him up. The shower felt good this morning, soothing somehow. He closed his eyes and leaned against the wall as the water fell on him. He saw her face again... and his eyes shot open. He turned off the water and stepped out to towel off. He had already decided to skip shaving today, his employer would have to deal with the scruff. He dressed in the mirror fogged bathroom, never bothering to check his appearance or even glance in the mirror's direction. He knew what he looked like, a zombie, and a hair style or a shave would not change that.
He poured the coffee into the commuter cup, grabbed the work he had brought home to fill his night with and headed out to his car. Traffic was always a nightmare when he headed to work. He used to listen to books on tape and had even been trying to learn Japanese for a trip he and Sarah had planned for Japan. He no longer bothered with that stuff, he didn't even listen to the radio. Instead, he sat in the car for almost an hour listening to the sounds his car made, secretly hoping that the sounds were actually a bigger problem that could keep him from work. In his haze of bad thoughts and pointless dreams he suddenly remembered it had been a year ago today. Sarah had disappeared unexpectedly one year ago today. The tears finally began to fall, she was really gone.
Monday, February 16, 2009
The Guest Room Pt. 1 - a short story
It was going to be one of those nights, Joshua could tell already. The weariness he felt in his entire being was crying out for him to lay down and call it a day. Of course the minute he did his mind woke up. Joshua was taking his friend's advice and was determined to lay there, in his bed, and focus all his energy on staring at one stable spot. Supposedly by distracting his mind from all the worries and thoughts racing through his head he would be able to nod off into dreamland. It was not working yet. He was not looking at the clock, so he was not sure how long he had been staring at the broken slat on his window blinds, but it felt like a long time. It was long enough for him to remember the day the slat broke. He and Sarah had moved into this two bedroom house together. It was their first big purchase as a married couple and they were proud of it. It did not matter that it now took 45 minutes to get to work when their apartment had been only ten minutes away. It was their home and that was a very big deal. They had moved in a month before the slat got broke and the room had been sitting bare with only the blinds covering the window. With their most recent paycheck they went out to buy furniture for the room. It was designated the guest room and because of that they needed a bed. They bought a full sized bed on sale but Joshua had still felt a little ripped off by the whole process. Why were mattresses so expensive anyway? Joshua had ranted the whole way home about mattresses being the equivalent of highway robbery and Sarah had repressed her giggles. For some odd reason, watching Joshua get bent out of shape about silly things that were out of his control made Sarah giggle. That giggle of hers was how they first met and started dating. She was working at a juice bar inside the gym Joshua worked out at and had been for weeks. He loved getting a juice drink at the end of a good work out but hated the prices, usually he kept his thoughts to himself. He would just ordered from the cute girl behind the counter and leave. That day was a little different. He went up to order an strawberry orange energy booster smoothie when he noticed a new item, wheat grass. Before he knew it he had started complaining about the price of wheat grass shots and how he couldn't understand how eating lawn clippings could cost so much. He was in full tirade mode when she started laughing. He had never had that reaction before and was a little embarrassed but he figured the worst was already past, so he asked her out. He had loved her the minute he first heard her laugh at him for being retarded. She was a cute girl but that laugh was what drove him to ask her out. Within a year they were married and within 2 they were buying a house.
They had manhandled the box springs out of the truck that he had borrowed from his father and walked it inside the house. Everything was going swimmingly when he tripped while walking into the room backwards. He fell right into the window but managed not to break it. Unfortunately the blinds had not been fully installed yet (his fault) and they came crashing down on his head. Needless to say it hurt and he was upset, so he took the blinds and threw them to the ground. When he calmed down, he picked it all back up but several of the slats were bent and one was broken. After his irritation and anger was over he and Sarah had laughed about the blind incident. So the broken blind was a good memory for him and he couldn't help but smile as he laid there. Unfortunately this memory was multiplying and other thoughts began springing up in his head. He was lost in remembrance and he had to tear his eyes away. He refocused on the wall closest to him. There was a weird pattern in the wall texture and he sat there making shapes out of it until his lids grew heavy and finally closed.
They had manhandled the box springs out of the truck that he had borrowed from his father and walked it inside the house. Everything was going swimmingly when he tripped while walking into the room backwards. He fell right into the window but managed not to break it. Unfortunately the blinds had not been fully installed yet (his fault) and they came crashing down on his head. Needless to say it hurt and he was upset, so he took the blinds and threw them to the ground. When he calmed down, he picked it all back up but several of the slats were bent and one was broken. After his irritation and anger was over he and Sarah had laughed about the blind incident. So the broken blind was a good memory for him and he couldn't help but smile as he laid there. Unfortunately this memory was multiplying and other thoughts began springing up in his head. He was lost in remembrance and he had to tear his eyes away. He refocused on the wall closest to him. There was a weird pattern in the wall texture and he sat there making shapes out of it until his lids grew heavy and finally closed.
My TV converter and a Rambling Review of Friday the 13th
Well it was a slow weekend for me. I spent most of Valentine's day watching TV and doing homework. Today I decided I was going to go out and do something.... and before I knew it, it was 9 PM. I am not sure how that happens but it happens a lot when I have no plans and nothing to do. I decided around 6 PM that I would see a movie tonight. Now that it was 9 PM I realized I needed to get going. I had a quick errand to run before I spent time staring at a movie screen. I had to return some movies to Hollywood Video that were rented while Maryann was here. Which meant they were at least a day late and I did not need them to get any later. Hollywood Video is right next to the grocery store and I wanted to get some Valentine's candy on sale, I love discounted holiday candy. On the way in to the store I saw a sale on the digital converter boxes. Instead of $55.00 it was $40.00, the exact amount of the government coupon. I ran out to my car, got the coupon and bought the box, along with a box of chocolates and a mini m&m's cupid figure. Knowing I was running out of time to have a wide selection of movies I headed over to the theater. When I got there I was too late to see the movie I had planned to see, Push. I looked at the available movie times and decided quickly on a second movie, bought a ticket and headed in. I wish I had taken an extra minute to decide....
Now for a review of Friday the 13th
I am sure you know the rough semblance of the story, even if you have never seen one of these movie. Some dude in a hockey mask loves slaughtering naughty teenagers. Of course it was not always the hockey mask guy slaughtering people. In the first movie it was Jason's mother killing the horny camp counselors. You see mommy dearest sent her disfigured/retarded son, Jason, to Camp Crystal Lake. In an amazing move of incompetence the camp counselors are too busy fornicating to see that Jason is drowning. Mommy dearest gets her revenge for her son's death by slaughtering a whole group of new counselors who had nothing to do with the death of her son. Nothing like a little justice! How exactly Jason came about to star as the silent killer of the whole mess of sequels, considering he dies in the first movie, is a little beyond me. It makes no sense but I say stop worrying about the illogicalness (technical words are what I am about) of it all. Just accept that Jason, the dead kid, is now Jason the giant, hulking, machete wielding, hockey mask sporting killer we all love.
OK... so this is a sequel then right? Another movie towards Jason's never ending list of movies? Nope. In yet another bewildering move that makes you wonder what is wrong with Hollywood, this is a retelling. I am not sure what is going on but it seems that every year there is another Horror movie being redone. Halloween, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Hills Have Eyes and The Omen are a few that pop into mind. So Friday the 13th is not the first to get the reshoot treatment. It is weird that this is happening because it doesn't seem like they are old enough to get the new spin.... I hear that the next movie redub being tossed around is the Nightmare on Elm Street series. They are going to relaunch Freddy.... either way that is not my review today. I am focusing on Friday the 13th and that is why I wanted you to know the original movie was a tale of a mother seeking revenge for the death of her son.
I was curious when I heard this movie was coming out and even more curious when I saw that it had a hockey mask toting, machete wielding fiend in the ads. I wondered aloud if they had decided to do without the mom aspect. I had a chance to see this movie on Monday the 9th for free as part of a preview audience. I declined the chance because my sister was in town and this is not her type of movie. I still wanted to see the movie though. So when I missed Push's start time I pulled the trigger on this movie. The movie starts with a girl running through the wilderness and you can tell she is scared. She is limping along and using something as a crutch but you can't tell what because of the camera work. You know, the shaky cam that I can't stand. Then we hear Jason's mama giving her the "You let my boy die" lecture right before she lunges at the girl who is pleading and crying that she was not responsible for Jason's death. Of course the girl uses her crutch to chop off Jason's moms head at the last second. The crutch was a machete, apparently. As the opening credits roll we see little hands scavenge a locket from the mother's body and run off with the abandoned machete as well. Apparently that was Jason and he had been there to witness his mother's demise. Oh no! YAWN!!!!
We pick up with a group of rejects camping out in the abandoned camp area. They get killed pretty quickly, all except one girl who we never see die. YAWN!!!
The "possibly not dead" girl's brother is looking for her and he meets a bunch of new rejects headed to a rich kids parents cabin. The rich kid is a jerk and we want a great death scene for him immediately. YAWN!!! Unfortunately the death scene he gets is stupid and not worth it. In fact most of the deaths were just kind of... boring. I started yawning in the middle of the movie. I was suddenly wishing that I had waited to see this movie at the beer theaters... At least then I could have had a beer and made the movie viewing worthwhile.
I am sure you can guess how the movie went... people died then other people went looking for those dead people and then they died. All of this is something I expected in a Friday the 13th move but usually I get a laugh or two at the absurdity of the death. This movie used the fame of the series and the date to make a few bucks on a movie that made the schlocky precursors look fun, exciting and intelligent. I am seriously offended that the movie was this boring and that I spent more time wishing I had seen Confessions of A Shopaholic then paying attention to the screen. I can't stop you from seeing this movie and I am not trying too.... I am just hoping you go in expecting a suckfest. It was like Michael Bay tried to inject realism into an unrealistic flick.... totally not worth it.
Luckily I had the converter and the candy in my car to look forward too. I now have several free stations to watch and I am very happy. I am watching OPB Nature programming.... there are like 4 OPB stations. The picure looks great!
Now for a review of Friday the 13th
I am sure you know the rough semblance of the story, even if you have never seen one of these movie. Some dude in a hockey mask loves slaughtering naughty teenagers. Of course it was not always the hockey mask guy slaughtering people. In the first movie it was Jason's mother killing the horny camp counselors. You see mommy dearest sent her disfigured/retarded son, Jason, to Camp Crystal Lake. In an amazing move of incompetence the camp counselors are too busy fornicating to see that Jason is drowning. Mommy dearest gets her revenge for her son's death by slaughtering a whole group of new counselors who had nothing to do with the death of her son. Nothing like a little justice! How exactly Jason came about to star as the silent killer of the whole mess of sequels, considering he dies in the first movie, is a little beyond me. It makes no sense but I say stop worrying about the illogicalness (technical words are what I am about) of it all. Just accept that Jason, the dead kid, is now Jason the giant, hulking, machete wielding, hockey mask sporting killer we all love.
OK... so this is a sequel then right? Another movie towards Jason's never ending list of movies? Nope. In yet another bewildering move that makes you wonder what is wrong with Hollywood, this is a retelling. I am not sure what is going on but it seems that every year there is another Horror movie being redone. Halloween, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Hills Have Eyes and The Omen are a few that pop into mind. So Friday the 13th is not the first to get the reshoot treatment. It is weird that this is happening because it doesn't seem like they are old enough to get the new spin.... I hear that the next movie redub being tossed around is the Nightmare on Elm Street series. They are going to relaunch Freddy.... either way that is not my review today. I am focusing on Friday the 13th and that is why I wanted you to know the original movie was a tale of a mother seeking revenge for the death of her son.
I was curious when I heard this movie was coming out and even more curious when I saw that it had a hockey mask toting, machete wielding fiend in the ads. I wondered aloud if they had decided to do without the mom aspect. I had a chance to see this movie on Monday the 9th for free as part of a preview audience. I declined the chance because my sister was in town and this is not her type of movie. I still wanted to see the movie though. So when I missed Push's start time I pulled the trigger on this movie. The movie starts with a girl running through the wilderness and you can tell she is scared. She is limping along and using something as a crutch but you can't tell what because of the camera work. You know, the shaky cam that I can't stand. Then we hear Jason's mama giving her the "You let my boy die" lecture right before she lunges at the girl who is pleading and crying that she was not responsible for Jason's death. Of course the girl uses her crutch to chop off Jason's moms head at the last second. The crutch was a machete, apparently. As the opening credits roll we see little hands scavenge a locket from the mother's body and run off with the abandoned machete as well. Apparently that was Jason and he had been there to witness his mother's demise. Oh no! YAWN!!!!
We pick up with a group of rejects camping out in the abandoned camp area. They get killed pretty quickly, all except one girl who we never see die. YAWN!!!
The "possibly not dead" girl's brother is looking for her and he meets a bunch of new rejects headed to a rich kids parents cabin. The rich kid is a jerk and we want a great death scene for him immediately. YAWN!!! Unfortunately the death scene he gets is stupid and not worth it. In fact most of the deaths were just kind of... boring. I started yawning in the middle of the movie. I was suddenly wishing that I had waited to see this movie at the beer theaters... At least then I could have had a beer and made the movie viewing worthwhile.
I am sure you can guess how the movie went... people died then other people went looking for those dead people and then they died. All of this is something I expected in a Friday the 13th move but usually I get a laugh or two at the absurdity of the death. This movie used the fame of the series and the date to make a few bucks on a movie that made the schlocky precursors look fun, exciting and intelligent. I am seriously offended that the movie was this boring and that I spent more time wishing I had seen Confessions of A Shopaholic then paying attention to the screen. I can't stop you from seeing this movie and I am not trying too.... I am just hoping you go in expecting a suckfest. It was like Michael Bay tried to inject realism into an unrealistic flick.... totally not worth it.
Luckily I had the converter and the candy in my car to look forward too. I now have several free stations to watch and I am very happy. I am watching OPB Nature programming.... there are like 4 OPB stations. The picure looks great!
Sunday, February 15, 2009
The Rambling Review of The Hammer
School is annoying! WAH! Cry me a freaking river! Yeah, yeah. I should thank my lucky stars I am in school racking up enormous levels of debt. Boo hoo! OK I am done crying about school for a little while. Thanks for all the empathy and compassion you lot showed me. I hope your milk goes bad before you can use it all.
I am back to reviewing movies... why can't someone pay me for this? Anyway this movie came out last year and never really made a huge run of it but the reviews are pretty positive. Almost all the reviews seem to share one common factor: they are amazed Adam Carolla can act. I am a fan of Adam Carolla and every chance I get I listen to his radio show. I was fully aware that The Hammer was coming out and I had planned to see the movie but it slipped by anyhow. To say I was completely coherent and observant during the last year would be a lie. I spent a good majority of the time avoiding thinking about the impending doom of my job loss and then I spent an entire summer on bar hopping, sun soaking and beer drinking. It was fabulous. So I missed this movie's run at the box office. Luckily for me I have friends. The friend I need to thank in particular is Cat. Not because I think she will ever read this review (because she won't) but because she saw this move and knew me enough to get me a copy. You see Cat likes listening to Adam Carolla and unlike me, (who never manages to turn on a radio before 10 AM) she gets to hear a moment or two of Adam Carolla's radio show most mornings. He began announcing the release of his movie and a special offer to autograph any copies that were sent to him. Cat bought a few copies and sent them directly to him. She bought a copy for me and sent my copy of The Hammer to be autographed. I recieved the movie in January but I just saw this movie tonight. I am not so good on the follow through.... my bad. Anyway this long intro is over and now I bring you, without further delay, my review of The Hammer.
A pathetic but supposedly skilled carpenter, that is down on his luck, stumbles into a second shot for a boxing career. His left is dropping blows of amazing force that soon catches a boxing trainers eye. With a little bad luck at his current job and a promise of a new future our 40 year old hero, played by Adam Carolla, decides to give boxing another shot. He begins training with 2 other Olympic hopefuls including one that is gunning for the same weight division. The young gun is threatened by the old carpenter and is inspired to train harder. The carpenter uses the young kids taunts to drive him harder and we see this old funny guy has heart, guts and determination. Never to be out cliched Carolla's hero is plagued by a previous boxing career that went down in flames due to his own lack of ambition. To add the twist the trainer who gives him his second chance has devious plans that are less concerned with this old guys future then with milking him for free training for his young star. Haunted by his past it seems he is always ready to give up and stick with his self imposed label of a loser. Even when his new girl, best friend (Ozzy) and sparring partner/top rival tell him not too.
This was a nice story of a come back kid, who has wised up a bit as he aged. Some dreams are worth fighting for (pardon the pun) and sometimes it takes a moment to find the right dreams to fight for. Being a fan of the Adam Carolla show I know this was shot on a pretty small budget but it is not cheesy nor overly pathetic. I knew the likely flow of the story before it happened but I still enjoyed the ride. I would recommend checking out The Hammer for those in the mood for an underdog movie, a sports comedy or a romantic comedy. It has a little bit of everything. This movie is not awesome but it's good, entertaining and delivers on all the heart warming moments you need.
P.S. Keep an eye out for the Nicaraguan star, Ozzy. He steals every single scene he is in.
I am back to reviewing movies... why can't someone pay me for this? Anyway this movie came out last year and never really made a huge run of it but the reviews are pretty positive. Almost all the reviews seem to share one common factor: they are amazed Adam Carolla can act. I am a fan of Adam Carolla and every chance I get I listen to his radio show. I was fully aware that The Hammer was coming out and I had planned to see the movie but it slipped by anyhow. To say I was completely coherent and observant during the last year would be a lie. I spent a good majority of the time avoiding thinking about the impending doom of my job loss and then I spent an entire summer on bar hopping, sun soaking and beer drinking. It was fabulous. So I missed this movie's run at the box office. Luckily for me I have friends. The friend I need to thank in particular is Cat. Not because I think she will ever read this review (because she won't) but because she saw this move and knew me enough to get me a copy. You see Cat likes listening to Adam Carolla and unlike me, (who never manages to turn on a radio before 10 AM) she gets to hear a moment or two of Adam Carolla's radio show most mornings. He began announcing the release of his movie and a special offer to autograph any copies that were sent to him. Cat bought a few copies and sent them directly to him. She bought a copy for me and sent my copy of The Hammer to be autographed. I recieved the movie in January but I just saw this movie tonight. I am not so good on the follow through.... my bad. Anyway this long intro is over and now I bring you, without further delay, my review of The Hammer.
A pathetic but supposedly skilled carpenter, that is down on his luck, stumbles into a second shot for a boxing career. His left is dropping blows of amazing force that soon catches a boxing trainers eye. With a little bad luck at his current job and a promise of a new future our 40 year old hero, played by Adam Carolla, decides to give boxing another shot. He begins training with 2 other Olympic hopefuls including one that is gunning for the same weight division. The young gun is threatened by the old carpenter and is inspired to train harder. The carpenter uses the young kids taunts to drive him harder and we see this old funny guy has heart, guts and determination. Never to be out cliched Carolla's hero is plagued by a previous boxing career that went down in flames due to his own lack of ambition. To add the twist the trainer who gives him his second chance has devious plans that are less concerned with this old guys future then with milking him for free training for his young star. Haunted by his past it seems he is always ready to give up and stick with his self imposed label of a loser. Even when his new girl, best friend (Ozzy) and sparring partner/top rival tell him not too.
This was a nice story of a come back kid, who has wised up a bit as he aged. Some dreams are worth fighting for (pardon the pun) and sometimes it takes a moment to find the right dreams to fight for. Being a fan of the Adam Carolla show I know this was shot on a pretty small budget but it is not cheesy nor overly pathetic. I knew the likely flow of the story before it happened but I still enjoyed the ride. I would recommend checking out The Hammer for those in the mood for an underdog movie, a sports comedy or a romantic comedy. It has a little bit of everything. This movie is not awesome but it's good, entertaining and delivers on all the heart warming moments you need.
P.S. Keep an eye out for the Nicaraguan star, Ozzy. He steals every single scene he is in.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
A pic to share
Hey all!
I was looking at the pictures from Maryann's visit and I have some good ones. Unfortunately I have not felt like doing anything with them as of yet. Luckily for you during my perusal I discovered that I did want to share one pic of Maryann at the Japanese Garden. It is a cute one and for the record it was actually a pretty cold day. I was bundled pretty decently too.... 3 layers. Not quite at Maryann's level of bundling (312 layers) but a lot of layers for me.
If you wanted something to read... I found a post I made in 2007 that made me giggle. It was my post about "My tips for a successful blog!" Here is the link: http://crazedlunatikdesigns.blogspot.com/2007/10/my-tips-for-successful-blog.html
I was looking at the pictures from Maryann's visit and I have some good ones. Unfortunately I have not felt like doing anything with them as of yet. Luckily for you during my perusal I discovered that I did want to share one pic of Maryann at the Japanese Garden. It is a cute one and for the record it was actually a pretty cold day. I was bundled pretty decently too.... 3 layers. Not quite at Maryann's level of bundling (312 layers) but a lot of layers for me.
If you wanted something to read... I found a post I made in 2007 that made me giggle. It was my post about "My tips for a successful blog!" Here is the link: http://crazedlunatikdesigns.blogspot.com/2007/10/my-tips-for-successful-blog.html
Thursday, February 12, 2009
School sucks!
I was absolutely positively worth nothing yesterday. Well let's back up.... I did a lot yesterday. At Free Geek I helped rearrange the store for 5 hours. They have big plans for the place and I helped get a few of them started. It was a lot of work and I was tired when I got done. Of course my day was not done yet, I was headed to the NELA center to be available as a tutor. I almost got a chance to help edit a paper but that fell through as she decided to go home instead. So instead I worked on doing some prep work for my Mad Science classes. I organized the take homes I will hand out Thursday and Friday. It involves little baggies, clay and stir straws. Anyway, when I finally got home I turned on the television.... then the dvd player and watched Naruto. I was planning on doing some homework after watching a show or two. After the first show ended I dutifully turned on the computer with good intentions; instead I got sucked into the internet.
I watched Kyle XY and talked to people on Facebook. Next thing I know I'm yawning and it is 12:30... I failed to post anything in the online class Wednesday and as a result I will need to reply to things on Saturday. I planned to have Saturday off... Let me explain. At the University of Phoenix, online courses (and the mixed physical class and online class that I have) have a standard rule about proper participation. I need to be online 4 times a week, reply to 2 posts from other people per day, and post an original response to all teacher posted questions. I did not do anything on Sunday or Monday and in order to take Saturday off I needed to be online Tuesday through Friday. In the past classes I have been online and posting everyday. The combination of my volunteering and working has significantly reduced my available time but that is not the main issue here. The main issue is that a year into the program I am a little demotivated. Perhaps it's the nonstop method of classes, maybe it's the fact that I am learning more with my after school teaching then I am in these classes, or it could be that the assignments I am doing seem to have little to do with reality, more of a time filler then anything else. Either way I am feeling less and less inclined to jump into the fray and discuss the silly topics. I am tired of the assigned reading that seems to think blathering incessantly about theory will help prepare me for the classroom. Maybe one of the factors in my burn out are struggling to look for a place to do the required observation hours with no tips or help from the school. In a lot of ways this school has made being in school easier but it has made things harder.
Here is an example: I am never quite sure who to talk to or help in an advising role. I have a friend who sent a question off to someone they were thinking might e able to help or at least point them to the right person and a month later still had no answer. There is not a cyber advising office as far as I can tell and it is hard to really figure out what every ones role is in the school. I had experiences at NAU where I ran around trying to talk to the right person and kept getting redirected. I am not sure why there is no clear cut path to follow and there is so much groping around in the dark in academia. In all of my years in customer service and sales positions I was told that I needed to do everything in my power to make sure that I got the customer to the right person who would have the answer. I would call and track the person down before connecting the person (most of the time, unless the customer was in league with satan). Nothing is more frustrating then getting the run around but schools never seem to bother with improving this aspect. They put a lot of the strain of figuring out where to go and who to talk to on the student's back and in an online setting this can become even more frustrating. Considering the money funneling into these places this is a huge bone of contention for me. I should be walking on rose petals whenever I go to campus!
Yet that is not the reason I am tired of school and wanting desperately to be done. The real reason is that for every decent class I get I end up with 4 that are irrelevant. It is even worse with the homework. We do at least one assignment individually each week and usually one as a group, as a result there are plenty of assignments that make me think I am in a creative writing class. Even worse is that a lot of the classes are the same subjects with a different name so I write similar papers over and over again. All these assignments and classes miss the point. You need to teach to really learn to teach. Only after you teach do the theories begin to make sense. Why exactly would you think having aspiring teachers design a role play would teach them anything about being a teacher? So freaking irritating! GAH! Medical students work at a teaching hospital because they need to know more then just what a book says to be a doctor. Why don't teachers follow a soimilar path? Then again that is a totally different discussion better left for another time.
I watched Kyle XY and talked to people on Facebook. Next thing I know I'm yawning and it is 12:30... I failed to post anything in the online class Wednesday and as a result I will need to reply to things on Saturday. I planned to have Saturday off... Let me explain. At the University of Phoenix, online courses (and the mixed physical class and online class that I have) have a standard rule about proper participation. I need to be online 4 times a week, reply to 2 posts from other people per day, and post an original response to all teacher posted questions. I did not do anything on Sunday or Monday and in order to take Saturday off I needed to be online Tuesday through Friday. In the past classes I have been online and posting everyday. The combination of my volunteering and working has significantly reduced my available time but that is not the main issue here. The main issue is that a year into the program I am a little demotivated. Perhaps it's the nonstop method of classes, maybe it's the fact that I am learning more with my after school teaching then I am in these classes, or it could be that the assignments I am doing seem to have little to do with reality, more of a time filler then anything else. Either way I am feeling less and less inclined to jump into the fray and discuss the silly topics. I am tired of the assigned reading that seems to think blathering incessantly about theory will help prepare me for the classroom. Maybe one of the factors in my burn out are struggling to look for a place to do the required observation hours with no tips or help from the school. In a lot of ways this school has made being in school easier but it has made things harder.
Here is an example: I am never quite sure who to talk to or help in an advising role. I have a friend who sent a question off to someone they were thinking might e able to help or at least point them to the right person and a month later still had no answer. There is not a cyber advising office as far as I can tell and it is hard to really figure out what every ones role is in the school. I had experiences at NAU where I ran around trying to talk to the right person and kept getting redirected. I am not sure why there is no clear cut path to follow and there is so much groping around in the dark in academia. In all of my years in customer service and sales positions I was told that I needed to do everything in my power to make sure that I got the customer to the right person who would have the answer. I would call and track the person down before connecting the person (most of the time, unless the customer was in league with satan). Nothing is more frustrating then getting the run around but schools never seem to bother with improving this aspect. They put a lot of the strain of figuring out where to go and who to talk to on the student's back and in an online setting this can become even more frustrating. Considering the money funneling into these places this is a huge bone of contention for me. I should be walking on rose petals whenever I go to campus!
Yet that is not the reason I am tired of school and wanting desperately to be done. The real reason is that for every decent class I get I end up with 4 that are irrelevant. It is even worse with the homework. We do at least one assignment individually each week and usually one as a group, as a result there are plenty of assignments that make me think I am in a creative writing class. Even worse is that a lot of the classes are the same subjects with a different name so I write similar papers over and over again. All these assignments and classes miss the point. You need to teach to really learn to teach. Only after you teach do the theories begin to make sense. Why exactly would you think having aspiring teachers design a role play would teach them anything about being a teacher? So freaking irritating! GAH! Medical students work at a teaching hospital because they need to know more then just what a book says to be a doctor. Why don't teachers follow a soimilar path? Then again that is a totally different discussion better left for another time.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Bye Maryann!
Well, today is the day Maryann is leaving Portland to head back to Phoenix. As I said before, we have had a grand time! Yesterday we arose from our slumber a little later in the day but after our coffee we headed toward Multnomah Falls. Of course you have to stop a few places along the way first. We headed to Vista House and looked at the river. Vista House is an awesome place to stop and stretch your legs and take in the scenery. After that we stopped at Latourell Falls, Bridal Veil Falls and Wahkeena Falls. Leaving Multnomah Falls for the last stop before heading back to Portland. Of course the day started out sunny but soon storm clouds rolled in and while we were at Wahkeena Falls it started raining, then began hailing and went back to raining. It continued raining while we walked up to the Multnomah Falls bridge and even though I had wanted to hike a little more I decided against it. I was cold and wet and not wearing a rainproof jacket. We headed back to Portland and after a few minutes lounging at my apartment we headed to Thai Basil and had dinner. Of course 75% of the items there had some animal product in them, for example the curry had some crab paste or something like that in it. We had a good meal despite their efforts to eliminate everything Maryann could eat. I was a little tired and decided we should rent a few movies for the evening. We picked up Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist and Burn Before Reading. They were both good movies. Burn Before Reading had a few surprises in store and was pretty funny. Nick & Norah was a cute but predictable romantic comedy.
In a few minutes, Maryann will make one last trip to Voodoo Donuts and then we will throw her suitcase in my car. I will take her down to the MAX station and she will go bye bye. It has been fun but I need to get back to all my responsibilities.
In a few minutes, Maryann will make one last trip to Voodoo Donuts and then we will throw her suitcase in my car. I will take her down to the MAX station and she will go bye bye. It has been fun but I need to get back to all my responsibilities.
Monday, February 09, 2009
Maryann's Visit Thus Far
My sister, Maryann, is in town for a few days and we have been having a good time of it. She arrived on Thursday while I was learning how to guide high school students on how to fill out a scholarship app. To say that was a grand entrance filled with excitement and intrigue would be a lie. It was interesting for me because I will be doing this a few days a week until March 2, 2009; but not as interesting to Maryann who has no such plans. When that was done we headed to Hopworks Urban Brewery where I told her I would be vegetarian for her visit. I had french fries and an order of hummus and veggies for dinner along with some beer and freshly roasted peanuts. It was a good meal but I kind of had a craving for the pepperoni pizza that walked by....
Anyway we awoke on Friday and had coffee and donuts from Voodoo Donuts. They have a vegan donut which allowed Maryann to get a donut after years of senselessly (wink) depriving herself of them. I am not a huge donut fan but an occasional donut every once in a while is fun. Voodoo Donuts is a fun place to go when the craving hits. They specialize in strange combos such as a donut that is shaped like a man that is stabbed with a pretzel (like a voodoo doll), a maple bar topped with bacon, cereal topped donuts (Cocoa Puffs, Trix, etc.), chicostick topped, an apple fritter covered with peanut butter, chocolate and chocolate chips. You may have seen this place on Rachel Ray's show and most recently on the Amazing Race, it is a Portland standard. Anyway then I had to head to work and she headed to a day of gallivanting about town. When I was finally done with work and the responsibilities inherent within that realm we went out. The first stop was Report Lounge, where we met some co-workers. Then we ended the night at East Burn.... we also found out that Portland craft beers are stronger then Coronas. Of course by we I mean she found out and I realized in the future a warning might be in order. The next day was more or less a wash. We met Dad, MaryJo and Aunt Wanda at Macaroni Grill and had a nice chat. Then we went to see Valkyrie at Laurelhurst Theaters where I drank beer and she abstained. She was still a little less then 100% and we went home and watched movies....
Today we slept in a little and then headed to Sweet Pea. Sweet Pea is a vegan bakery at the vegan "mall"; one of four stores. Yes, vegans call a four store grouping a mall.... they gets no respect! If you were a vegan you might be happy to see a place where you could get sweets, slogan tees, a tattoo and groceries (all guaranteed to be cruelty free) in one spot. You might also think that Sweet Pea's scary Sunday brunch is worth going back to. Of course, I am not vegan so I am merely supposing here. I went to Sweet Pea mainly because my crazy tree hugging sister was dying to go there. I ordered a bagel with a chipotle spread on it and a cup of coffee. No that is not true.... I ordered orange juice but orange juice is for brunch participants only. My second choice was coffee. I am still wondering how that coffee was so hot.... Anyway the bagel was good but the smear was really spicy, almost unpleasantly so. Maryann dived on the brunch and the orange juice. The brunch had one decent looking thing.... a hash brown slightly reminiscent of a McDonald's hash brown. Then they had neon yellow glop that pretended to be eggs, a sad looking gravy, biscuits that I personally thought needed to be browned for a moment or two, and these super scary grey lumps. Maryann reports the grey lumps were delicious..... I think that this further proves that vegans are crazy. Imagine if you will that you own a paper pulping business and one day while you are pulping paper you begin to wonder if the grey mush is edible so you cut a chuck out, bake it and eat it. Soon you have added seasoning to it and people that are totally crazy start buying it from you.... that is what I thought about as I looked at the grey lumps. Those grey lumps were scary looking, Maryann admitted that she was not thrilled by their appearance but she knew they were animal product free and she gobbled it down. Why? Presentation should count for something! Alas I am speaking of people who hate animal slaughter but love meat so much that they spend a lot of time making products look, taste and feel like meat. Sounds like a lot of wasted time to me! Apparently mysterious grey lumps are just fine for most vegans. Well that is enough on scary grey lumps and loony non-meat eating meat lovers. I must confess that my theory is that all vegans had a bad petting zoo experience where a goat followed them around biting them and it caused massive emotional trauma to their psyche.
Anyway I was dying to go to a place called the Curry Leaf. The Curry Leaf is a great little Indian food place in Beaverton. They have a buffet on Sunday that is completely vegetarian and several of the offerings are vegan. We headed there even after the scary brunch. Maryann loved it. Indian food is one of the things I always use to argue that meatless does not mean bad or side dish all the time. This particular place serves two buffets on the weekends. Saturday is the more familiar buffet with Tandoori chicken and a few other meat dishes amongst vegetable dishes, apparently this style is more common in Northern India. Southern India has it's day on Sunday and it is sans meat. All the products are flavorful, spicy and filled with a variety of textures that make you crave another helping. It was my second trip and I hope to go back again soon.
From there we headed to the Japanese Garden for a walk around in the crisp February weather. It was a good day for being at the garden as most people stayed at home and kept warm. From the gardens we headed to NW 23rd avenue, known as a shopping mecca in Portland. We wandered through a few shops before arriving at Laurelwood Public House and shared a basket of garlic fries. I had to get home to work on some homework which Maryann made all the more sweeter by providing a sweet treat from Sweet Pea (all puns within this sentence are intentional). I should clarify that the baked goods at Sweet pea are actually really good and not noticeably vegan. So maybe the Vegans are trying to slowly win over the non-vegans by serving a few tasty products without relying on any other animals besides the human making it. When I was done with my homework stint we headed out to see the movie Religulous at the Laurelhurst theater and did so with a pitcher of beer. Anyway I am about to call it a night.
As for any vegans out there I am just teasing. You can pursue making the perfect non-meat meat product for the rest of time if that makes you happy. Someone has to eat all the strange grey lumps in the world and it might as well be you. As I read this aloud Maryann tells me that she was never chased by an evil goat at a petting zoo; I guess my theories are sometimes wrong. Maybe people that eat meat were harrassed by petting zoo animals.....
Anyway we awoke on Friday and had coffee and donuts from Voodoo Donuts. They have a vegan donut which allowed Maryann to get a donut after years of senselessly (wink) depriving herself of them. I am not a huge donut fan but an occasional donut every once in a while is fun. Voodoo Donuts is a fun place to go when the craving hits. They specialize in strange combos such as a donut that is shaped like a man that is stabbed with a pretzel (like a voodoo doll), a maple bar topped with bacon, cereal topped donuts (Cocoa Puffs, Trix, etc.), chicostick topped, an apple fritter covered with peanut butter, chocolate and chocolate chips. You may have seen this place on Rachel Ray's show and most recently on the Amazing Race, it is a Portland standard. Anyway then I had to head to work and she headed to a day of gallivanting about town. When I was finally done with work and the responsibilities inherent within that realm we went out. The first stop was Report Lounge, where we met some co-workers. Then we ended the night at East Burn.... we also found out that Portland craft beers are stronger then Coronas. Of course by we I mean she found out and I realized in the future a warning might be in order. The next day was more or less a wash. We met Dad, MaryJo and Aunt Wanda at Macaroni Grill and had a nice chat. Then we went to see Valkyrie at Laurelhurst Theaters where I drank beer and she abstained. She was still a little less then 100% and we went home and watched movies....
Today we slept in a little and then headed to Sweet Pea. Sweet Pea is a vegan bakery at the vegan "mall"; one of four stores. Yes, vegans call a four store grouping a mall.... they gets no respect! If you were a vegan you might be happy to see a place where you could get sweets, slogan tees, a tattoo and groceries (all guaranteed to be cruelty free) in one spot. You might also think that Sweet Pea's scary Sunday brunch is worth going back to. Of course, I am not vegan so I am merely supposing here. I went to Sweet Pea mainly because my crazy tree hugging sister was dying to go there. I ordered a bagel with a chipotle spread on it and a cup of coffee. No that is not true.... I ordered orange juice but orange juice is for brunch participants only. My second choice was coffee. I am still wondering how that coffee was so hot.... Anyway the bagel was good but the smear was really spicy, almost unpleasantly so. Maryann dived on the brunch and the orange juice. The brunch had one decent looking thing.... a hash brown slightly reminiscent of a McDonald's hash brown. Then they had neon yellow glop that pretended to be eggs, a sad looking gravy, biscuits that I personally thought needed to be browned for a moment or two, and these super scary grey lumps. Maryann reports the grey lumps were delicious..... I think that this further proves that vegans are crazy. Imagine if you will that you own a paper pulping business and one day while you are pulping paper you begin to wonder if the grey mush is edible so you cut a chuck out, bake it and eat it. Soon you have added seasoning to it and people that are totally crazy start buying it from you.... that is what I thought about as I looked at the grey lumps. Those grey lumps were scary looking, Maryann admitted that she was not thrilled by their appearance but she knew they were animal product free and she gobbled it down. Why? Presentation should count for something! Alas I am speaking of people who hate animal slaughter but love meat so much that they spend a lot of time making products look, taste and feel like meat. Sounds like a lot of wasted time to me! Apparently mysterious grey lumps are just fine for most vegans. Well that is enough on scary grey lumps and loony non-meat eating meat lovers. I must confess that my theory is that all vegans had a bad petting zoo experience where a goat followed them around biting them and it caused massive emotional trauma to their psyche.
Anyway I was dying to go to a place called the Curry Leaf. The Curry Leaf is a great little Indian food place in Beaverton. They have a buffet on Sunday that is completely vegetarian and several of the offerings are vegan. We headed there even after the scary brunch. Maryann loved it. Indian food is one of the things I always use to argue that meatless does not mean bad or side dish all the time. This particular place serves two buffets on the weekends. Saturday is the more familiar buffet with Tandoori chicken and a few other meat dishes amongst vegetable dishes, apparently this style is more common in Northern India. Southern India has it's day on Sunday and it is sans meat. All the products are flavorful, spicy and filled with a variety of textures that make you crave another helping. It was my second trip and I hope to go back again soon.
From there we headed to the Japanese Garden for a walk around in the crisp February weather. It was a good day for being at the garden as most people stayed at home and kept warm. From the gardens we headed to NW 23rd avenue, known as a shopping mecca in Portland. We wandered through a few shops before arriving at Laurelwood Public House and shared a basket of garlic fries. I had to get home to work on some homework which Maryann made all the more sweeter by providing a sweet treat from Sweet Pea (all puns within this sentence are intentional). I should clarify that the baked goods at Sweet pea are actually really good and not noticeably vegan. So maybe the Vegans are trying to slowly win over the non-vegans by serving a few tasty products without relying on any other animals besides the human making it. When I was done with my homework stint we headed out to see the movie Religulous at the Laurelhurst theater and did so with a pitcher of beer. Anyway I am about to call it a night.
As for any vegans out there I am just teasing. You can pursue making the perfect non-meat meat product for the rest of time if that makes you happy. Someone has to eat all the strange grey lumps in the world and it might as well be you. As I read this aloud Maryann tells me that she was never chased by an evil goat at a petting zoo; I guess my theories are sometimes wrong. Maybe people that eat meat were harrassed by petting zoo animals.....
Sunday, February 01, 2009
What a SUPER day!
First off let me say that The Slants are a cool band with a great sound. Helping Oregon Music Live film their show was a complete blast. I will be looking to help them do this again.
Now let me share that I am really hoping the Cardinals will win today. I already have my Cardinals gear on and I am ready for some football.
Finally, I want to share a few comics I found amusing that have nothing to do with sports! Two of these are Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis. The first one was funny to me because I always found Shakespeare to be hard to understand and te second one amuses me because I find the whole anger over people not speaking English to be a little crazy. The last one is Get Fuzzy by Darby Conley and I just love this conversation about poetry.
Now let me share that I am really hoping the Cardinals will win today. I already have my Cardinals gear on and I am ready for some football.
Finally, I want to share a few comics I found amusing that have nothing to do with sports! Two of these are Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis. The first one was funny to me because I always found Shakespeare to be hard to understand and te second one amuses me because I find the whole anger over people not speaking English to be a little crazy. The last one is Get Fuzzy by Darby Conley and I just love this conversation about poetry.
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