Thursday, June 21, 2007
Pearls Before Swine does it again
I swear this guy is taking my thoughts directly from my head. He is just a lot smarter about how he portrays this type of an act. He draws a talking rat character doing this and I tell people I wish I could do this so I end up looking crazy. I think I may be on a few people's lists for people on the edge. I am hot listed. The thing is I am not the danger it's the people that smile all day and never address anything that snap. I complain too much to snap. See I retreat into a smacking people with a bat or tazering annoying people fantasies and I get over things quickly. I just have to learn not to share all the time.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Small Towns and Me is like Gin and Sprite: It just ain't right!
Let's start off by saying that I don't hate small towns. I mean we all know I am lying at this point but let's say it anyway. I think small towns are terribly boring and I just don't understand the urge to live in them. People say things to me when I say this, like: it's a great place to raise kids, you know your neighbors, it's safer, and small town charm (which means what to me exactly, when I find small towns neither charming nor inviting). I wasn't born in a small town and maybe that is why I don't get it. I was born in a city with a crime problem, a drug problem and all the other problems cities have. I don't focus on that though what I see something different. I think of lots of options of things to do, places to go, new experiences to try out, an art scene, an airport, malls, big mega movie theaters, sushi bars (notice a lot of these things are plural very important to have multiple things) and a lot more. I figure my core group of friends are just as tight as any small town group could be. Even if we are spread out all over the country at this point. I think maybe the city life has one major take away and that is not learning how to make my own entertainment. I am working on that though with the guitar, my art, writing and this silly blog. Now that my perspective has been laid out I figure I will tell you about my trip down to Hanford, CA.
My dad and I started out early Thursday morning. The trip took 11 hours but we hit two In-N-Out Burgers joints on the way, around brunch and lupper times (yes I said lupper). We saw about a million highway patrol on the road so we were not pushing our luck and neither was the rest of the traffic. Which mainly consisted of truckers clogging the right lane, then jumping into the left lane to pass another truck just as you attempted to pass them. I have dubbed this behavior 'leapfrogging' because I honestly think they wait until about 6 cars are coming up to pass to make the move and to do so in such a manner that they net cars in the double digits before the pass is completed. Yes I said it, trucks pass only to block regular traffic, they form groups and take turns passing each other all the way until they reach their destination. Which seems very similar to the game of leapfrog and therefore the name is applied to the behavior. Anyway it was early evening when we arrived and we hit the apricot trees like birds smacking into the phone booth in that scene from that Alfred Hitchcock movie about birds.... what was it called??? Why couldn't he have just called it The Birds, just think how simple that would have been to remember. It was probably called "flying rats of doom" or something like that (hehe). After we had gorged ourselves on fresh tasty fruit and various vegetables we headed in to talk about stuff and catch up. Grandpa was doing pretty good and Uncle David seemed in good shape as well. Although Grandpa was having a touch of the porcelain thrown sit downs and we teased him about eating too much fruit. Remember these words folks: Poking fun can sometimes lead to a turn about. MY UPPANCE WILL COME!
The four of us headed to Denny's for a big breakfast the next morning and the remains went to the two dogs at home. Then we headed to see Grandma at the nursing home. She has lost a lot of weight since I saw her last (4 years ago almost) but I understand she has not lost any weight in the last 30 days which is good. We ran some errands and then went to Grandpa's pad for a while. Then headed out to Applebee's for a father's day meal for grandpa. I am not sure but this might have been the place of my impending intestinal downfall. We headed home and I gobbled roasted almonds like someone was trying to deprive me of them. This is probably my favorite pass time at grandpa's, the constant flow of food I hardly ever eat. We finished the night off with a bacon and fresh tomato, from grandpa's garden, sandwich. We watched some TV and then called it a night.
I woke up feeling ill. I couldn't handle the smells of breakfast cooking so I dared not eat. I was glad when they offered to leave me behind that morning since I had already had prolonged conversations with the porcelain throne. I sat at home chewing Tums and wondering if I should attempt to eat. I decided to have a bowl of cereal and a glass of milk. It stayed down for a little while but soon I was back in the bathroom making comedy style noises and just wishing I was in the third installment of "Dumb and Dumbererer er" and that my best friend had slipped me some laxatives and it would pass as soon as the medicine wore out for stealing his lady he was too afraid to talk to. For some odd reason my nether regions started giving it a rest as grandpa's started acting up again. I had been watching TV while they were off running about and grandpa decided to complain about the TV and the fact we were watching it nearly the second he and my dad got back. About that time my dad wanted to head over to see Grandma again so I managed to go along without pushing an old lady off the pot so I could have a turn. Then we headed to Starbucks (where I dared a coffee drink), when I turned to my pop and said "I go to Mexico and eat at every dive taco stand I came across, the more flies around the place the better it was and I don't get sick but one day in Hanford and I end up with a wrecked digestive track." We then headed to Target to pick up chew-able Maalox, I chewed those dang things all evening, including during dinner. We had a great spread: steak, fresh red potatoes from the garden, a salad (fresh tomatoes), a squash dish (fresh)and homemade ice cream. The dinner was fun but should have been a lot more fun for a few reasons I don't feel like addressing in the blog. The good thing was my body appeared to be cooperating and it even seemed to be doing so as we started heading home the next day.
The drive home. We hit In-N-Out Burger in Redding and the next stop I was reading graffiti in the restroom stall. It had nothing to do with the burger because first of all food poisoning does not work that fast and second of all I had been burping all day just like the day before and nothing was relieving the bloated feeling. Needless to say it was a miserable ride the rest of the way. I felt bad for my pop who drove with me sleeping most of the day and asking to stop again the rest of the day. I ended up calling in sick on Monday so I could finish getting over it and ended up sleeping a lot once it started to pass for good.
So you are thinking about my opening and my anti-small town nonsense and thinking what does this have to do with a trip that involved a whole lot of bathroom breaks? Well Hanford is not a big city, it is not a teeny town either I guess it is a kinda medium town, I have no idea the population or the definitions of town sizes I am just guessing, basically to me Hanford is too small. I have visited several times and I have been ok but this time I was bouncing off the walls. I needed something to do but I hadn't packed art supplies or a book and I did not feel like writing and I had not brought fresh batteries for the camera and it was too blasted hot outside anyway. So I turned on the TV because I can only talk prices for so long and my dad can only talk prices for about an hour. However I think grandpa was disappointed that we did not sit around talking all day and night. I felt bad about that and I felt bad that I couldn't figure out what to do but being outside reminded me why I ran away to Portland in the first place. I couldn't do manual labor out there in the heat I have never functioned that well in the heat so gardening was out. I remember it was Mother's day in 2003 and Becky, Maryann, John and family had I had went in on some rose bushes for my mom. We were planting them and I was drenched in sweat by just glancing at the shovel. I do not like the heat and was not built to endure it with any hint of grace. I get all hot, irritated and feel ready to murder people. I figure by being in a cooler climate I reduce other people's risk of death, some may even call me a humanitarian. I am way off course here, my point is that without an obvious thing to do I have a hard time finding something to do. So I turned on the satellite TV and vege'd out.
I guess the real bottom line was it was a good trip but I need to ensure a smoother and more successful time in the future. Even if that means dragging sources of entertainment with me. The paint stuff, the drawing, the book making stuff, the guitar and a few books. Oh and a few batteries for my camera. People with kids do it all the time why not pamper myself every once in a while? And I don't mean putting on diapers you sickos! (even if crazy Nasa chicks do it during a cross country drive to kidnap a rival for a boys affection) I had a great time seeing Grandpa and Uncle David. I was glad I got to see Grandma. I wish I had not gotten sick but what can you do?
My dad and I started out early Thursday morning. The trip took 11 hours but we hit two In-N-Out Burgers joints on the way, around brunch and lupper times (yes I said lupper). We saw about a million highway patrol on the road so we were not pushing our luck and neither was the rest of the traffic. Which mainly consisted of truckers clogging the right lane, then jumping into the left lane to pass another truck just as you attempted to pass them. I have dubbed this behavior 'leapfrogging' because I honestly think they wait until about 6 cars are coming up to pass to make the move and to do so in such a manner that they net cars in the double digits before the pass is completed. Yes I said it, trucks pass only to block regular traffic, they form groups and take turns passing each other all the way until they reach their destination. Which seems very similar to the game of leapfrog and therefore the name is applied to the behavior. Anyway it was early evening when we arrived and we hit the apricot trees like birds smacking into the phone booth in that scene from that Alfred Hitchcock movie about birds.... what was it called??? Why couldn't he have just called it The Birds, just think how simple that would have been to remember. It was probably called "flying rats of doom" or something like that (hehe). After we had gorged ourselves on fresh tasty fruit and various vegetables we headed in to talk about stuff and catch up. Grandpa was doing pretty good and Uncle David seemed in good shape as well. Although Grandpa was having a touch of the porcelain thrown sit downs and we teased him about eating too much fruit. Remember these words folks: Poking fun can sometimes lead to a turn about. MY UPPANCE WILL COME!
The four of us headed to Denny's for a big breakfast the next morning and the remains went to the two dogs at home. Then we headed to see Grandma at the nursing home. She has lost a lot of weight since I saw her last (4 years ago almost) but I understand she has not lost any weight in the last 30 days which is good. We ran some errands and then went to Grandpa's pad for a while. Then headed out to Applebee's for a father's day meal for grandpa. I am not sure but this might have been the place of my impending intestinal downfall. We headed home and I gobbled roasted almonds like someone was trying to deprive me of them. This is probably my favorite pass time at grandpa's, the constant flow of food I hardly ever eat. We finished the night off with a bacon and fresh tomato, from grandpa's garden, sandwich. We watched some TV and then called it a night.
I woke up feeling ill. I couldn't handle the smells of breakfast cooking so I dared not eat. I was glad when they offered to leave me behind that morning since I had already had prolonged conversations with the porcelain throne. I sat at home chewing Tums and wondering if I should attempt to eat. I decided to have a bowl of cereal and a glass of milk. It stayed down for a little while but soon I was back in the bathroom making comedy style noises and just wishing I was in the third installment of "Dumb and Dumbererer er" and that my best friend had slipped me some laxatives and it would pass as soon as the medicine wore out for stealing his lady he was too afraid to talk to. For some odd reason my nether regions started giving it a rest as grandpa's started acting up again. I had been watching TV while they were off running about and grandpa decided to complain about the TV and the fact we were watching it nearly the second he and my dad got back. About that time my dad wanted to head over to see Grandma again so I managed to go along without pushing an old lady off the pot so I could have a turn. Then we headed to Starbucks (where I dared a coffee drink), when I turned to my pop and said "I go to Mexico and eat at every dive taco stand I came across, the more flies around the place the better it was and I don't get sick but one day in Hanford and I end up with a wrecked digestive track." We then headed to Target to pick up chew-able Maalox, I chewed those dang things all evening, including during dinner. We had a great spread: steak, fresh red potatoes from the garden, a salad (fresh tomatoes), a squash dish (fresh)and homemade ice cream. The dinner was fun but should have been a lot more fun for a few reasons I don't feel like addressing in the blog. The good thing was my body appeared to be cooperating and it even seemed to be doing so as we started heading home the next day.
The drive home. We hit In-N-Out Burger in Redding and the next stop I was reading graffiti in the restroom stall. It had nothing to do with the burger because first of all food poisoning does not work that fast and second of all I had been burping all day just like the day before and nothing was relieving the bloated feeling. Needless to say it was a miserable ride the rest of the way. I felt bad for my pop who drove with me sleeping most of the day and asking to stop again the rest of the day. I ended up calling in sick on Monday so I could finish getting over it and ended up sleeping a lot once it started to pass for good.
So you are thinking about my opening and my anti-small town nonsense and thinking what does this have to do with a trip that involved a whole lot of bathroom breaks? Well Hanford is not a big city, it is not a teeny town either I guess it is a kinda medium town, I have no idea the population or the definitions of town sizes I am just guessing, basically to me Hanford is too small. I have visited several times and I have been ok but this time I was bouncing off the walls. I needed something to do but I hadn't packed art supplies or a book and I did not feel like writing and I had not brought fresh batteries for the camera and it was too blasted hot outside anyway. So I turned on the TV because I can only talk prices for so long and my dad can only talk prices for about an hour. However I think grandpa was disappointed that we did not sit around talking all day and night. I felt bad about that and I felt bad that I couldn't figure out what to do but being outside reminded me why I ran away to Portland in the first place. I couldn't do manual labor out there in the heat I have never functioned that well in the heat so gardening was out. I remember it was Mother's day in 2003 and Becky, Maryann, John and family had I had went in on some rose bushes for my mom. We were planting them and I was drenched in sweat by just glancing at the shovel. I do not like the heat and was not built to endure it with any hint of grace. I get all hot, irritated and feel ready to murder people. I figure by being in a cooler climate I reduce other people's risk of death, some may even call me a humanitarian. I am way off course here, my point is that without an obvious thing to do I have a hard time finding something to do. So I turned on the satellite TV and vege'd out.
I guess the real bottom line was it was a good trip but I need to ensure a smoother and more successful time in the future. Even if that means dragging sources of entertainment with me. The paint stuff, the drawing, the book making stuff, the guitar and a few books. Oh and a few batteries for my camera. People with kids do it all the time why not pamper myself every once in a while? And I don't mean putting on diapers you sickos! (even if crazy Nasa chicks do it during a cross country drive to kidnap a rival for a boys affection) I had a great time seeing Grandpa and Uncle David. I was glad I got to see Grandma. I wish I had not gotten sick but what can you do?
Monday, June 11, 2007
Holy guaca'FREAKIN'mole!
Well it seems like more then enough time has past since I added a blog entry. I try to update on a regular basis but sometimes I get in moods where the act of writing a pointless blog about nothing seems more trouble then it is worth. That is usually when I should start writing, however it is usually when I stop. I have watched a few movies since we last spoke..
Big Wednesday - Surfers in the 60's. The more I see about that time period the less I find it interesting. Some of the surfing was pretty good. It had the Greatest American Hero guy in this movie as well as Gary Busey oh and also Robert Englund (Freddy Kruegger). This movie just meandered through a few deadbeat derelicts lives and had no real point. They were friends I guess but I am not sure why since they did not seem to like each other, the Vietnam War happened some went to war others went to great lengths to be excused from service, and at the end they surfed huge waves in California... Yeah that was pretty much it.
When the Levees Broke - A documentary on the Katrina catastrophe by Spike Lee. I have seen disc one of this 3 disc set and I have to say I had no clue what was really going on down there. So far I am 5 days into the catastrophe and it is a total mess. It really is shocking to see this all laid out there with this very horrible footage from the event.
Children of Men - The world's women are infertile and no one knows why. Somehow a young woman gets pregnant and these brain surgeons think let's transport her through very dangerous conditions to a theoretical safety place during her eighth month of pregnancy. So everything goes wrong, everyone has an agenda for the mother and her child, the baby gets born in a very bad place to be born and the movie leaves you before you know if it will end well.
Apocalypto - A very ugly movie that reveals nothing of it's subjects histories or culture. It does nothing for Mayan descendants or how the world views this long gone civilization. It starts with a brutal pig hunting and gutting scene. Everyone makes fun of the fat infertile guy (Infertility seems to be a trend in movies I have ended up with the last two days). Then some evil guys take this whole village brutally and drag them to a temple to be sacrificed. Somehow the main guy manages to keep his internal organs internal and his head attached so that he can spend the rest of the movie running from the evil guys. It ends with evil conquistadors making landfall. I can sum this movie up in two words "Don't bother"
Music & Lyrics - After the downers I have been viewing lately I picked a nice light fluffy romantic comedy. It was cute, it had some laughs, but it hardly reinvented the genre. It is still a relatively pain free evening of light hearted entertainment. Add some beer, a cute special friend and it could turn into a great evening. (This last statement is not tested or endorsed by this blog, it is purely the thoughts and ideas of this one blogger.)
I probably have seen others but who cares.
I have been in a little mini drama at work. I need a California insurance license to help people in the state of California. California also thinks they need to know everything you have done ever, including misdemeanors from ten years ago. I had no paperwork on the cussing out a cop violation that happened back in college except the citation. That was not enough of course so I had to send away for "OFFICIAL" court documents from Flagstaff, AZ that say I got a fine and paid it. I would be happy to just let California motorists go without my skills of telephonic evasion but unfortunately the overlords at the plantation think helping Californians is vital to my job. So every week I would be reminded my very employment hinged on this stupid license and every week I would say the State of Arizona only has one speed and that is Arizona speed, the papers will come when they come. I got these "vital" papers Saturday, I turned them in today and they are en route to worthless government employees in California. Hopefully very soon I will have worthless papers from the state of California so that I too can be yelled at about insurance rates. FANTASTIC!! GO California!
I stopped looking for a new place to live because I am broke and I really don't want to pay more then I am paying. I have no money for a security deposit and I figure I might as well wait a little while until I can scrounge a few pennies together. I still want to move but it is not the best time to do so.
I went to an Organic Beer Festival last Friday with my friend Chad. It was a good time and the beer was nice. We did not stay long just long enough to get a nice buzz. Other then that same stuff different day.
Big Wednesday - Surfers in the 60's. The more I see about that time period the less I find it interesting. Some of the surfing was pretty good. It had the Greatest American Hero guy in this movie as well as Gary Busey oh and also Robert Englund (Freddy Kruegger). This movie just meandered through a few deadbeat derelicts lives and had no real point. They were friends I guess but I am not sure why since they did not seem to like each other, the Vietnam War happened some went to war others went to great lengths to be excused from service, and at the end they surfed huge waves in California... Yeah that was pretty much it.
When the Levees Broke - A documentary on the Katrina catastrophe by Spike Lee. I have seen disc one of this 3 disc set and I have to say I had no clue what was really going on down there. So far I am 5 days into the catastrophe and it is a total mess. It really is shocking to see this all laid out there with this very horrible footage from the event.
Children of Men - The world's women are infertile and no one knows why. Somehow a young woman gets pregnant and these brain surgeons think let's transport her through very dangerous conditions to a theoretical safety place during her eighth month of pregnancy. So everything goes wrong, everyone has an agenda for the mother and her child, the baby gets born in a very bad place to be born and the movie leaves you before you know if it will end well.
Apocalypto - A very ugly movie that reveals nothing of it's subjects histories or culture. It does nothing for Mayan descendants or how the world views this long gone civilization. It starts with a brutal pig hunting and gutting scene. Everyone makes fun of the fat infertile guy (Infertility seems to be a trend in movies I have ended up with the last two days). Then some evil guys take this whole village brutally and drag them to a temple to be sacrificed. Somehow the main guy manages to keep his internal organs internal and his head attached so that he can spend the rest of the movie running from the evil guys. It ends with evil conquistadors making landfall. I can sum this movie up in two words "Don't bother"
Music & Lyrics - After the downers I have been viewing lately I picked a nice light fluffy romantic comedy. It was cute, it had some laughs, but it hardly reinvented the genre. It is still a relatively pain free evening of light hearted entertainment. Add some beer, a cute special friend and it could turn into a great evening. (This last statement is not tested or endorsed by this blog, it is purely the thoughts and ideas of this one blogger.)
I probably have seen others but who cares.
I have been in a little mini drama at work. I need a California insurance license to help people in the state of California. California also thinks they need to know everything you have done ever, including misdemeanors from ten years ago. I had no paperwork on the cussing out a cop violation that happened back in college except the citation. That was not enough of course so I had to send away for "OFFICIAL" court documents from Flagstaff, AZ that say I got a fine and paid it. I would be happy to just let California motorists go without my skills of telephonic evasion but unfortunately the overlords at the plantation think helping Californians is vital to my job. So every week I would be reminded my very employment hinged on this stupid license and every week I would say the State of Arizona only has one speed and that is Arizona speed, the papers will come when they come. I got these "vital" papers Saturday, I turned them in today and they are en route to worthless government employees in California. Hopefully very soon I will have worthless papers from the state of California so that I too can be yelled at about insurance rates. FANTASTIC!! GO California!
I stopped looking for a new place to live because I am broke and I really don't want to pay more then I am paying. I have no money for a security deposit and I figure I might as well wait a little while until I can scrounge a few pennies together. I still want to move but it is not the best time to do so.
I went to an Organic Beer Festival last Friday with my friend Chad. It was a good time and the beer was nice. We did not stay long just long enough to get a nice buzz. Other then that same stuff different day.
Monday, June 04, 2007
Randomness!
So I have been busy lately. I have been painting, hanging with some peeps, enjoying a few 2 day weekends, reading 5 books, watching 12 movies, talking on the phone, emailing people, sending paintings as Mother's day gifts, sending books to my niece, reading that same nieces newspaper articles she wrote and had published in her school paper, hanging out with a friend and his 6 month old son, checking out pictures of all the new May babies, and finally completely ignoring my blog! How do you like them apples??
To prove I have been painting I will share a few of them with you:
This is actually the painting my mom now owns. Looks a little cooler without the flash all over it. In case you are curious it's acrylic.
This one is watercolor and actually my 3rd watercolor. I have found that I prefer acrylics and oil to watercolor because they are easier to cover up mistakes with. IN case anyone is an oil paint expert I have a question for you. If you spill oil paint in your carpet and you got most of it out with paint thinner, how can you get the rest out? In case you are wondering I am buying a tarp this next paycheck.
I wanted to share a picture that was pretty cool of an ad campaign. Nationwide put a wall scape on their office building in Ohio and it is pretty eye catching. Check it out, click on it to make it bigger.
There are 3 cars with paint on them the wall scape spills into the parking lot. It is really pretty cool. Does it sell the product? Well with the 3 cars covered I think it does....
Super Quick Movie Reviews:
The Illusionist - Usual Suspects with magic and olden time nonsense
Rome Season 1 - Uh..... Well Caeser dies... did he really die that soon after gaining power? It was like a few months. Why is he famous again? Is it just because he died at the hands of 'Friends'? Well now I know why it is called Rome and not Caeser.
Avatar Season 1 - Totally awesome. A great cartoon series.
Avatar Season 2 - Still awesome, great characters!
Pan's Labyrinth - Creepy and a bit of a downer but pretty amazing at the same time.
Stomp The Yard - Not very good but still pretty entertaining. I loved the sliding on the head thing even if they showed it in every commercial for this movie.
Thank You For Smoking - HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Brilliant! Made me want to be a lobbyist.
Night At The Museum - Good times! Very amusing, like a huge 'Indian in the Cupboard'.
Eragon - Oh no! How quickly can we stomp out interest in a book? Let's make a supercrappy movie very loosely based on it and then people will go see Shrek 45 instead of reading.
Marie Antoinette - Let's have a 2 hour 1980's synth-rock music video about someone famous and then lets skip the beheading (the best part)! Oh and let's leave everything up to artistic interpretation and not really tell a story. People need big picture books to understand things.
Notes On A Scandal - Can we say "Gave up before it started!"?
Deja Vu - Holy crap! Really good movie I didn't even know existed. Denzel Washington is a seen it all ATF agent who gets a chance to change the recent past. Very well done, very engaging. I didn't even paint during this one.
The Purple Rose of Cairo - Holy Hannah could this end any crappier??? BOOO WOODY ALLEN!!! BOO!! I think you suck! I hope you fall off a pier into a great white shark's mouth, one that makes Jaws look tiny! I hope Nessie attacks you while you visit Loch Ness, then spits you out, and then I hope you get your movie making license revoked and someone makes a career of following you around and mocking you. Jerk! Stupid dumb unfunny hack. If you think he is funny you are probably at least in your 50's.... and if you aren't I bet no one likes you and you never get to join in any reindeer games.
Woo!
To prove I have been painting I will share a few of them with you:
This is actually the painting my mom now owns. Looks a little cooler without the flash all over it. In case you are curious it's acrylic.
This one is watercolor and actually my 3rd watercolor. I have found that I prefer acrylics and oil to watercolor because they are easier to cover up mistakes with. IN case anyone is an oil paint expert I have a question for you. If you spill oil paint in your carpet and you got most of it out with paint thinner, how can you get the rest out? In case you are wondering I am buying a tarp this next paycheck.
I wanted to share a picture that was pretty cool of an ad campaign. Nationwide put a wall scape on their office building in Ohio and it is pretty eye catching. Check it out, click on it to make it bigger.
There are 3 cars with paint on them the wall scape spills into the parking lot. It is really pretty cool. Does it sell the product? Well with the 3 cars covered I think it does....
Super Quick Movie Reviews:
The Illusionist - Usual Suspects with magic and olden time nonsense
Rome Season 1 - Uh..... Well Caeser dies... did he really die that soon after gaining power? It was like a few months. Why is he famous again? Is it just because he died at the hands of 'Friends'? Well now I know why it is called Rome and not Caeser.
Avatar Season 1 - Totally awesome. A great cartoon series.
Avatar Season 2 - Still awesome, great characters!
Pan's Labyrinth - Creepy and a bit of a downer but pretty amazing at the same time.
Stomp The Yard - Not very good but still pretty entertaining. I loved the sliding on the head thing even if they showed it in every commercial for this movie.
Thank You For Smoking - HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Brilliant! Made me want to be a lobbyist.
Night At The Museum - Good times! Very amusing, like a huge 'Indian in the Cupboard'.
Eragon - Oh no! How quickly can we stomp out interest in a book? Let's make a supercrappy movie very loosely based on it and then people will go see Shrek 45 instead of reading.
Marie Antoinette - Let's have a 2 hour 1980's synth-rock music video about someone famous and then lets skip the beheading (the best part)! Oh and let's leave everything up to artistic interpretation and not really tell a story. People need big picture books to understand things.
Notes On A Scandal - Can we say "Gave up before it started!"?
Deja Vu - Holy crap! Really good movie I didn't even know existed. Denzel Washington is a seen it all ATF agent who gets a chance to change the recent past. Very well done, very engaging. I didn't even paint during this one.
The Purple Rose of Cairo - Holy Hannah could this end any crappier??? BOOO WOODY ALLEN!!! BOO!! I think you suck! I hope you fall off a pier into a great white shark's mouth, one that makes Jaws look tiny! I hope Nessie attacks you while you visit Loch Ness, then spits you out, and then I hope you get your movie making license revoked and someone makes a career of following you around and mocking you. Jerk! Stupid dumb unfunny hack. If you think he is funny you are probably at least in your 50's.... and if you aren't I bet no one likes you and you never get to join in any reindeer games.
Woo!
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Red Box Gives Me New Life
You know I should be paid for this, really. I recently noticed a large red vending machine outside my local Albertson's. It had lots of pretty pictures all over it and a touch screen monitor in the middle of it. I began pushing buttons and little images appeared and I was delighted. I selected one slid my card through and out popped a dvd. I paid a buck and was able to view it. The next day I returned it but if I hadn't it would have been another buck. I did all this in full view of a Blockbusters store. It was glorious, it was new, and it was inventive. The company calls themselves Red Box and you can see more at REDBOX.COM
The first movie I saw was "Thank You For Smoking" which was such a wonderful guilty pleasure I almost ran out to find a job defending big tobacco. It cost me a dollar. The second movie was "Stomp the Yard", a urban drama about an inner city youth redefining himself in college with the help of a fraternity, a girl and a step team. It was a little silly but it was still enjoyable and it also only cost a dollar. Tonight I rented a total stinker of a film, a real dog. "Eragon" a movie that seemed to take as little from the book it gets it's title and character names from as possible. It was awful but that horrendous viewing torture session cost me a dollar. Not 4 dollars like the video store. I love Red Box and I hope it continues to operate. A thing to note is that Red Box seems to only have the latest movies. You won't find the original Night of the Living Dead here nor will you find Nosferatu, they are just too old!
Some of you may be thinking but don't you have Netflix Mike? Well yeah I do but it seems every weekend I find myself without a movie to view and that means no movie until Tuesday at the earliest. I have been renting from other establishments dropping nearly 8 dollars every weekend when I could have just spent 2 dollars. TWOOOO DOOOLLLAAAARRRS!!! I WANT MY TWOOO DOOOOLLLAAAARRRSSS! (Name that movie)
The first movie I saw was "Thank You For Smoking" which was such a wonderful guilty pleasure I almost ran out to find a job defending big tobacco. It cost me a dollar. The second movie was "Stomp the Yard", a urban drama about an inner city youth redefining himself in college with the help of a fraternity, a girl and a step team. It was a little silly but it was still enjoyable and it also only cost a dollar. Tonight I rented a total stinker of a film, a real dog. "Eragon" a movie that seemed to take as little from the book it gets it's title and character names from as possible. It was awful but that horrendous viewing torture session cost me a dollar. Not 4 dollars like the video store. I love Red Box and I hope it continues to operate. A thing to note is that Red Box seems to only have the latest movies. You won't find the original Night of the Living Dead here nor will you find Nosferatu, they are just too old!
Some of you may be thinking but don't you have Netflix Mike? Well yeah I do but it seems every weekend I find myself without a movie to view and that means no movie until Tuesday at the earliest. I have been renting from other establishments dropping nearly 8 dollars every weekend when I could have just spent 2 dollars. TWOOOO DOOOLLLAAAARRRS!!! I WANT MY TWOOO DOOOOLLLAAAARRRSSS! (Name that movie)
Monday, May 21, 2007
Newsy News
Wasn't that the most interesting review of a weekend I have ever done?
Anyways I have some news.
Kevin K admitted he secretly loves the Bee Gee's.
Doug and Amber had their twin girls this last week and they are super cute.
I am apartment hunting but currently have had no luck.
And that is the news.
Anyways I have some news.
Kevin K admitted he secretly loves the Bee Gee's.
Doug and Amber had their twin girls this last week and they are super cute.
I am apartment hunting but currently have had no luck.
And that is the news.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Long Days
Well this week started out weird. My desk mate at work Crystal (She was mentioned during the RTA 2007 ceremony as a nominee), came in about midday on Monday and tendered her resignation. It was not totally out of the blue. She had become increasingly irritated with some of the stat counting that had become the focus of the job. Even though the interview consisted of them telling us how stats aren't that big of a deal as long as you take care of your customer. That wasn't the only reason she quit but I am sure it helped make the decision for her. She has some serious family stuff going on right now and wanted to have time to take care of things properly. The whole problem is that now I am the only one in my row and I am dying of boredom. The evil company also cracked down on drawing, reading and any other activity between calls so I don't even have the relief of drawing during my increasingly lengthening wait times. I am bouncing off the walls! The sad thing is this week I am spending half of my time in training and the other half on the phones. Once training is over I will be taking calls in our new system and I will not have long wait times but I still need something to make the day tolerable again. Stupid no drawing rule! Stupid no neighbor having area! At least next week we get back in the class room for 4 full days instead of 1 full day and 3 half days. Training has the benefit of neighbors to keep me occupied. Anyway this week has seemed really long. I can not wait until this time tomorrow!
Sunday, May 13, 2007
A Rambling Review of 28 Weeks Later
It was a movie going experience like no other. I was the first to walk into the theater and I had an open seat selection. I chose dead center. I put my soda in the cup holder and I prepared to wait out the next 20 minutes before show time by playing a stupid game on my mobile phone. A total of 6 other people came in and it was nearly time. I switched my phone to silent mode and got ready for the film to begin. The room went dark and the previews started and then 20 people came in. All 20 people sat in the two rows directly behind mine. They were loud too! Eating popcorn like cows grazing in the field and by that I meant they must have trucked it in because all 20 people were mowing down the popcorn. It was insanity I could barely hear the trailers over the crunching. I was debating on whether to move or not when the movie started and they all went quiet. Completely quiet! For 30 fricking seconds! That was when somebody started uttering the phrases that the actor had just said. I turned and looked in the general direction when the on screen actors heard a loud banging on the door and some kid begging to be let in. I turned back to the movie and they had let the kid in (always a mistake in horror movies, never help people when you are in a horror movie, it just sends bad karma your way). Anyway these people allow the kid some food and he is obviously hungry and he is stuffing food into his dirty face with his hands when one of my uneducated 'friends' behind me decide to say "Oh that is disgusting!" Which, let's be realistic people, is surprising, this is a horror movie about zombies. Zombies like to eat live people.... you have to expect this movie to have disgusting moments, and this scene of a starved child was not one of them. So my shocked and horrified 'friends' and I watched the kid continue to stuff his face when some girl looks out a boarded up window (another bad thing to do in horror movies if you commit to hiding then pretend like there is no outside) and of course an enraged zombie bursts through for a quick bite. This does not offend my discerning palated 'friends' because for the next few minutes of frantic running and bashing of zombies, utter silence prevails. The scene was mystifying because it did not focus on anything and made you feel like the camera man was actually being attacked by the zombies.... In fact I could not even tell who was being attacked or what was going on and I did not much care for that. Then the man with the crowbar who is there with his wife goes looking for her while she is looking for the boy that they let in that ended up leading these zombies to them. See how being kind in horror movies always ends up biting you in the backside? Anyway the zombies follow him up to the room and he is dragging his wife away when she sees the boy so she breaks the hold and goes to the boy as the zombies break down the door (once again helping people in horror movies is a big no-no). She starts calling for her hubby to save her but he decides to save his own butt and shuts and bolts a door and ends up running away while the zombies close in on him. His wife is beating on the window as he runs across the field to a motor boat. She gets yanked away from the window and the husband is the only survivor.....
Enter a new world. The zombie crisis is over because these zombies ate their entire food supply (us if you have not been keeping up) and the US army is working on taking London back. They have managed to have a little city that is home to quite a few people and is beginning to receive new people every day. Two kids are on the flight 'home' much to the surprise of our lovely doctor friend. They of course are our faithful but cowardly husbands kids. He tells the kids a slightly different tale of their mother's demise (which means it will come back to haunt you if you are in a horror movie). The kids are there barely a day when they decide to go to their real home to get some items, like a picture of mommy dearest. While they are there they discover a completely crazy mom who is surprisingly not dead just a little off the deep end. You hang out with zombies, hide in an attic and think you are the only person left alive in London and we shall see how sane you are! Anyway she obviously is immune to the virus that causes the lovely zombieism but she is not disease free. She carries the virus from at least one bite sustained during her zombie infested day. The husband gets infected from a kiss and soon the town is being firebombed by the US Army! GO TEAM! USA! USA! USA! This movie makes think the whole world hates us. Anyway the doctor has realized somewhere along the way that the kids are valuable for a possible vaccine and she along with an Army guy decide to get them safely out of London. The two helpers die, the kids don't but the son gets infected and he is of course immune. Needless to say the kids get out of London and they take out France with the sweet virus.
Through the whole movie I had the group of rejects talking, munching, getting up to use the bathroom a gajillion times and generally be distracting and obnoxious. I was really wishing a chainsaw wielding maniac would decide to come through the door a few times and dispose of my unwanted companions in a horribly bloody manner but it never happened. So the movie was tainted a bit and I have debated about doing this review because the retarded 20's involvement in my movie going experience may have completely biased my review. That being said I have decided either way I need to review it with all honesty. I loved 28 Days later, the original movie. I did not love 28 Weeks Later. The movie failed to introduce anything new to the genre. The zombies, who were groundbreaking in the first movie, were exactly the same. They were fast moving nightmares and the virus took hold immediately. That was an amazing difference from prior zombie flicks where you wondered where the real danger was when all the zombies moved at the speed of sloths. The zombies don't seem to change except maybe the dad zombie, infected by the immune mom, seems smarter. Maybe the mom's version of the virus improves his resourcefulness but I am not sure and I frankly never cared. That was where the problem originates. I was never made to care about these characters. I never hoped for them in the slightest and I was not shocked by anyone's fate. I also was annoyed by the frantic camera work that made it hard to see what was happening and to who it was happening. I know this is a style a lot of up and coming film makers seem to employ for action sequences but I did not like it in the Bourne Identity and I did not like it here. In fact it was rather distracting. Another annoying thing is the movie is very quiet for the most part. All the scenes not involving zombies seemed to be at a whispered volume. Combine that with deaf people and then lines are missed as the crowd repeats what was said the line before. I missed whole snippets of dialogue and was very annoyed by that. Maybe the movie house is to blame there. Well not 'maybe' it's more a definitely. When you hear the Spiderman 3 noise over the crazy zombie scene you know there is an issue. In a positive note I have to say that the teenaged daughter had amazingly expressive eyes and she did a wonderful job in showing emotion throughout the movie. She could have saved the movie and she very well might have had I not had the entire congregation of A.R.C. sitting behind me repeating lines to the hearing impaired in the group. I will probably get this movie from Netflix when it comes out on video just to make sure my disappointment in the movie was because of the movie and not because of the experience. If anything changes in my assessment of this movie I will let you know. If you should go see this movie I would love to hear your thoughts on it. Am I wrong or right? Was this as bad as it seemed or was it a gem that I should revisit?
Enter a new world. The zombie crisis is over because these zombies ate their entire food supply (us if you have not been keeping up) and the US army is working on taking London back. They have managed to have a little city that is home to quite a few people and is beginning to receive new people every day. Two kids are on the flight 'home' much to the surprise of our lovely doctor friend. They of course are our faithful but cowardly husbands kids. He tells the kids a slightly different tale of their mother's demise (which means it will come back to haunt you if you are in a horror movie). The kids are there barely a day when they decide to go to their real home to get some items, like a picture of mommy dearest. While they are there they discover a completely crazy mom who is surprisingly not dead just a little off the deep end. You hang out with zombies, hide in an attic and think you are the only person left alive in London and we shall see how sane you are! Anyway she obviously is immune to the virus that causes the lovely zombieism but she is not disease free. She carries the virus from at least one bite sustained during her zombie infested day. The husband gets infected from a kiss and soon the town is being firebombed by the US Army! GO TEAM! USA! USA! USA! This movie makes think the whole world hates us. Anyway the doctor has realized somewhere along the way that the kids are valuable for a possible vaccine and she along with an Army guy decide to get them safely out of London. The two helpers die, the kids don't but the son gets infected and he is of course immune. Needless to say the kids get out of London and they take out France with the sweet virus.
Through the whole movie I had the group of rejects talking, munching, getting up to use the bathroom a gajillion times and generally be distracting and obnoxious. I was really wishing a chainsaw wielding maniac would decide to come through the door a few times and dispose of my unwanted companions in a horribly bloody manner but it never happened. So the movie was tainted a bit and I have debated about doing this review because the retarded 20's involvement in my movie going experience may have completely biased my review. That being said I have decided either way I need to review it with all honesty. I loved 28 Days later, the original movie. I did not love 28 Weeks Later. The movie failed to introduce anything new to the genre. The zombies, who were groundbreaking in the first movie, were exactly the same. They were fast moving nightmares and the virus took hold immediately. That was an amazing difference from prior zombie flicks where you wondered where the real danger was when all the zombies moved at the speed of sloths. The zombies don't seem to change except maybe the dad zombie, infected by the immune mom, seems smarter. Maybe the mom's version of the virus improves his resourcefulness but I am not sure and I frankly never cared. That was where the problem originates. I was never made to care about these characters. I never hoped for them in the slightest and I was not shocked by anyone's fate. I also was annoyed by the frantic camera work that made it hard to see what was happening and to who it was happening. I know this is a style a lot of up and coming film makers seem to employ for action sequences but I did not like it in the Bourne Identity and I did not like it here. In fact it was rather distracting. Another annoying thing is the movie is very quiet for the most part. All the scenes not involving zombies seemed to be at a whispered volume. Combine that with deaf people and then lines are missed as the crowd repeats what was said the line before. I missed whole snippets of dialogue and was very annoyed by that. Maybe the movie house is to blame there. Well not 'maybe' it's more a definitely. When you hear the Spiderman 3 noise over the crazy zombie scene you know there is an issue. In a positive note I have to say that the teenaged daughter had amazingly expressive eyes and she did a wonderful job in showing emotion throughout the movie. She could have saved the movie and she very well might have had I not had the entire congregation of A.R.C. sitting behind me repeating lines to the hearing impaired in the group. I will probably get this movie from Netflix when it comes out on video just to make sure my disappointment in the movie was because of the movie and not because of the experience. If anything changes in my assessment of this movie I will let you know. If you should go see this movie I would love to hear your thoughts on it. Am I wrong or right? Was this as bad as it seemed or was it a gem that I should revisit?
Happy Mother's Day
It's Mother's Day! Happy Mother's day to my mom and every other mom out there. A special note goes out to Robert and Denise who are new parents of twins. Little Ethan and Cole are freshly minted and keeping their parents busy already.
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
All New Blog Entries Until I Stop Writing Them!
Have any of you been watching anything on NBC lately? I am sure all of you are much to smart to be watching the crap they push on you at NBC. I am just saying that I am not. I have been watching NBC kind of half heartedly. I like Heroes but I am not sure exactly why because to me it does not seem very likable. I bet that last confession just put somebody into therapy. The other show I like is The Real Wedding Crashers. It is usually hard to watch in one sitting so I usually tape it and watch it in spurts. I can't imagine a second season. It could only get zanier and I am betting that would get less fun super quick. My favorite scene was in this last Monday's episode and it involved a guy named Skippy who is not what you would call a ladies man... anyway they set two girls up to argue over him and have him just sitting there looking confused, here is a video clip.Anyway these shows are not the reason I wanted to talk about NBC. Although mentioning popular shows does raise my hit count and I always like that. The reason I am talking about NBC is there advertising sucks lately. They have been ending all their show announcements with the phrase (pardon the bold): "ALL NEW UNTIL THE END OF THE SEASON". Pardon me if I am missing something but isn't that how every single television season works? If I recall correctly it works this way: new shows until the season is over and then reruns. Now of course it works this way 3 new shows then a mid-season hiatus so long that they show 14 prior seasons and then premier 4 new shows. Then the season is over and we have a break until the next season. Every time I hear that phrase I feel like turning the TV off and picking up a book. I have read 7 books in the last month. And cnn.com has the nerve to ask "Where have all the viewers gone?" I am all over that! We can never tell when it is actually new shows on the damn TV so now we rent the damn show from Netflix! MORONS!!!
The show that seems to be firmly attached to this new tagline seems to be ER. I have to ask this. Who in their right minds still watches this show? I have never been a fan, admittedly, but I amazed the damn thing is still on! Seriously George CLooney was last on that show in 1978! End this show soon! Why is it still on? When they start having tag lines like "ER: The Wedding' the show is way past over.
Seeing how I am in mid rant here I think I am going to switch gears. Have you looked at Craigslist for pets? If you haven't go do it now. There seems to be some trend in the world of animal adoption that says in order to properly entice people to take this animal you must type the note as if you are the animal. I have a few examples here: Ex 1, EX 2, & Ex 3 (my favorite). What is wrong with people? I first of all know animals can't type but I feel that if they could they would not type up this crap. I think these animals have to be ten times smarter then these owners that are trying to ditch them. Every time I read a note like this I feel like taking the person to the pound to be put to sleep! Who thought it would be clever to start doing this? Why does this continue? I figure if you really want to type as if you are the animal at least give the animal an edge or something. Here is my example of a proper dog writing a letter trying to get a new home:
Example 1
Seriously ya gotta spring me this dame is all batty! It just gonna be like 200 for the papers and I am a free dog. I swear I'm good for it! I won't poo on your rug more then every other Tuesday! I will only eat the ugly fluffy couch pillow! I'm a good dog I deserve to live! Seriously the other day I was snipped! I mean I am harmless, I won't even hump your stuffed Kermit the Frog! Please just come and bust me outta here! There is all these other dogs and I have to sleep with one eye open! The pound ain't a place for pretty faced dogs like me! Honest it ain't! I can't even turn the corner without someone dropping the soap. I am too young to die! C'mon mista! I ain't gonna cost you much and the dames will really like me. I am a lady pleaser. I won't even pass gas in front of them or nothin! HONEST YA GOTTA HELP!!! I'M BEGGIN YA!!!
Example 2
Hey look at this bloody mess of a hat! They got me wearing this outfit like I am some sorta suuuper model or some such nonsense! It is bollocks if you ask me I ought to chomp their face off I should! Serve' tha lot of 'em right, dontcha think? Granted I'm not the tallest dog on the yard but a bloody raincoat! What am I Paddington bloody Bear? That one is a right jerk if you ask me! Sitting around in a raincoat all day wif nuthing going on ahtall! Should be ashamed he should! He's a ruttin' ol' bear not a bloody train station commuter. Where does a bear go that he needs a locomotive? It's bloody nonsense if you ask me! Anyway I would love to come to your home if you are not a right idiot that thinks they should dress me up in some bloody fool outfit. It just isn't decent! Cheers!
The show that seems to be firmly attached to this new tagline seems to be ER. I have to ask this. Who in their right minds still watches this show? I have never been a fan, admittedly, but I amazed the damn thing is still on! Seriously George CLooney was last on that show in 1978! End this show soon! Why is it still on? When they start having tag lines like "ER: The Wedding' the show is way past over.
Seeing how I am in mid rant here I think I am going to switch gears. Have you looked at Craigslist for pets? If you haven't go do it now. There seems to be some trend in the world of animal adoption that says in order to properly entice people to take this animal you must type the note as if you are the animal. I have a few examples here: Ex 1, EX 2, & Ex 3 (my favorite). What is wrong with people? I first of all know animals can't type but I feel that if they could they would not type up this crap. I think these animals have to be ten times smarter then these owners that are trying to ditch them. Every time I read a note like this I feel like taking the person to the pound to be put to sleep! Who thought it would be clever to start doing this? Why does this continue? I figure if you really want to type as if you are the animal at least give the animal an edge or something. Here is my example of a proper dog writing a letter trying to get a new home:
Example 1
Seriously ya gotta spring me this dame is all batty! It just gonna be like 200 for the papers and I am a free dog. I swear I'm good for it! I won't poo on your rug more then every other Tuesday! I will only eat the ugly fluffy couch pillow! I'm a good dog I deserve to live! Seriously the other day I was snipped! I mean I am harmless, I won't even hump your stuffed Kermit the Frog! Please just come and bust me outta here! There is all these other dogs and I have to sleep with one eye open! The pound ain't a place for pretty faced dogs like me! Honest it ain't! I can't even turn the corner without someone dropping the soap. I am too young to die! C'mon mista! I ain't gonna cost you much and the dames will really like me. I am a lady pleaser. I won't even pass gas in front of them or nothin! HONEST YA GOTTA HELP!!! I'M BEGGIN YA!!!
Example 2
Hey look at this bloody mess of a hat! They got me wearing this outfit like I am some sorta suuuper model or some such nonsense! It is bollocks if you ask me I ought to chomp their face off I should! Serve' tha lot of 'em right, dontcha think? Granted I'm not the tallest dog on the yard but a bloody raincoat! What am I Paddington bloody Bear? That one is a right jerk if you ask me! Sitting around in a raincoat all day wif nuthing going on ahtall! Should be ashamed he should! He's a ruttin' ol' bear not a bloody train station commuter. Where does a bear go that he needs a locomotive? It's bloody nonsense if you ask me! Anyway I would love to come to your home if you are not a right idiot that thinks they should dress me up in some bloody fool outfit. It just isn't decent! Cheers!
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
Training and more training
It was another fantabulous day in my life. I had a car that ran and a completely cleaned out checking account and more then likely my pop had a squeaky clean checking account as well. Stupid mechanic nonsense! Let's not waste times on trivial matters of past events. I will move forward. I went to work for the first day of training on the new systems. It wasn't too bad, they had us using the system right away which was a major complaint before for me. The class has a sense of humor and so does the trainer which is a good thing because that is how I stay awake is by laughing and making the boring stuff seem fun. It was about mid-day when I had my first wave of horror. As I sat eating my microwaved disaster I remembered that I had continuing education class that night from 6 to 9. The class, although tedious and horrible, was not the issue. The issue was my empty bank account and the lack of preparing for two meals today. I had brought one lunch and had a dollar fifty in my pocket. I was doomed to have a bag of chips and a can of soda for dinner. Then the reality of only one friend being in the class with me sank in. I was without entertainers and people to complain with. Then the reality of being at work from 7:45 to 4:30 hit really hard and I felt despair. I was sitting at my desk after being let out of training early.... waiting for the clock to hit 4:30 so I could clock out. I was a little confused as to what to do about dinner and what to do for an hour and a half. When the girl next to me gave me a buck towards dinner and I found 50 cents in my soda fund. I ran to Wendy's and got a 2.99 meal deal. It made my night. My coworker rocks!! Please forget about me damning her in the last blog for being right about my car! Then I just sat around and caught up on some email and looked at couches online at IKEA. Not that I will ever be able to buy a couch but I looked anyway.
The ce class was almost like the last class I took. The same monkey brained guy kept making comments and I kept feeling like kicking him during the presentation or shanking him.... Then I got a brilliant idea and I drew a story where the guy was eaten by my character Croc. Actually he was beheaded by Croc. Which made me giggle and kinda of ended up helping me overcome my ire. Kind of... I think I am skipping the next ce class.
The ce class was almost like the last class I took. The same monkey brained guy kept making comments and I kept feeling like kicking him during the presentation or shanking him.... Then I got a brilliant idea and I drew a story where the guy was eaten by my character Croc. Actually he was beheaded by Croc. Which made me giggle and kinda of ended up helping me overcome my ire. Kind of... I think I am skipping the next ce class.
Sunday, May 06, 2007
Cars.......
Do you ever notice that your car decides to betray you when there is nothing that can be done? I definitely noticed. I was driving home Friday, from an interesting evening that probably deserves it's own blog but will never see one... A light on my dash popped up it was my little battery icon. I had been driving for ten minutes now and the car had had no trouble starting up. I thought "Hmm.... it is a battery light but I know a dead battery and this is not a dead battery. I mean I am driving in the car, it has juice." I unplugged my iPod and turned off the radio. I turned off the heater and I drove in silence. My car was eerily quiet. If you know my car you know it is never ever quiet. It rattles along making all sorts of racket and a horrible jarring noise engulfs the cars whenever the exhausted shocks encounter a large bump or pothole. It is just part of my car and has been since a few months after I got it. After whatever those crafty Used Car Salesmen did at Tempe Dodge so it would sound smooth and quiet long enough for someone to buy it. In fact it often worries my passengers, fearing that the car will just go kaput right where we idle during a red light. It is the sound it should make and the sound I expect to hear from it when I am driving. A sound that means my car will continue moving. Friday night it made no sound as it idled, it made no sound as I drove and it didn't even object to the potholes in the street. It sounded like a car they make advertisements about. That combined with the glowing red battery light told me whatever was wrong was not a simple battery.
I woke up Saturday morning expecting to have a dead vehicle but it started. It started without the little light and without the comforting rattle of a car that always sounds like it will die at any moment. I hoped that the light would go away and that after work those guys at Les Schwab would say "Oh it's just a 50 dollar battery. No worries." Halfway to work the light was back. I worked all day long thinking about that stupid light. Crystal my cubicle neighbor said "It comes on after a little while? It's probably your alternator." Damn her and her prediction. It was a battery! It had to be, I could not afford anything else. I would later discover, much to my chagrin, that I didn't even have enough for that imagined battery. I rushed out of the evil towers that I called work and I headed to those ever so friendly Les Schwab guys. The guy caught me before I walked in the office and soon he was testing my car. "Your battery is fine. Your alternator is the problem." I asked him if they could get it fixed he said "We do not work on alternators." Then laughed mysteriously. OK so there was no mysterious laugh, but strangely enough as I wrote this line a loud mysterious laugh came from my neighbor... talk about creepy! Anyway he recommended a place that was closed at 3 and seeing how it was 4:50 I thanked him for his non-help. I drove home and looked at all the closed auto places thinking who the heck told them they could run on banking hours? As if breaking down only happened on the week day? How inconvenient is it that we all wait until Monday through Friday to get our cars fixed? I headed home and I stayed there. The next day I got up and called twenty places all of them were closed. I went back to bed. I got up again and watched Rome an HBO series about the Roman empire. It is interesting but not captivating if you ask me. Then I went out to my car half expecting it to not work. It started up in the same eerily quiet manner but soon there was a new and distinctly different rattle then I had ever heard and a weird metallic noise. I stumbled across an open Firestone, which amazed me. They unfortunately could not get the part today so I left. I drove all around and nothing else was open. I took my car home and I have sat here in worry ever since. I have no idea if this thing will start tomorrow. No idea if it will strand me somewhere and no idea how I was going to get the alternator fixed. So I made a decision. With some help from my dad I am taking tomorrow off and I am getting my car to someone that can fix my car the same day. Then I will pay my dad back. Not a great plan, or a good one even but it is a plan.
I woke up Saturday morning expecting to have a dead vehicle but it started. It started without the little light and without the comforting rattle of a car that always sounds like it will die at any moment. I hoped that the light would go away and that after work those guys at Les Schwab would say "Oh it's just a 50 dollar battery. No worries." Halfway to work the light was back. I worked all day long thinking about that stupid light. Crystal my cubicle neighbor said "It comes on after a little while? It's probably your alternator." Damn her and her prediction. It was a battery! It had to be, I could not afford anything else. I would later discover, much to my chagrin, that I didn't even have enough for that imagined battery. I rushed out of the evil towers that I called work and I headed to those ever so friendly Les Schwab guys. The guy caught me before I walked in the office and soon he was testing my car. "Your battery is fine. Your alternator is the problem." I asked him if they could get it fixed he said "We do not work on alternators." Then laughed mysteriously. OK so there was no mysterious laugh, but strangely enough as I wrote this line a loud mysterious laugh came from my neighbor... talk about creepy! Anyway he recommended a place that was closed at 3 and seeing how it was 4:50 I thanked him for his non-help. I drove home and looked at all the closed auto places thinking who the heck told them they could run on banking hours? As if breaking down only happened on the week day? How inconvenient is it that we all wait until Monday through Friday to get our cars fixed? I headed home and I stayed there. The next day I got up and called twenty places all of them were closed. I went back to bed. I got up again and watched Rome an HBO series about the Roman empire. It is interesting but not captivating if you ask me. Then I went out to my car half expecting it to not work. It started up in the same eerily quiet manner but soon there was a new and distinctly different rattle then I had ever heard and a weird metallic noise. I stumbled across an open Firestone, which amazed me. They unfortunately could not get the part today so I left. I drove all around and nothing else was open. I took my car home and I have sat here in worry ever since. I have no idea if this thing will start tomorrow. No idea if it will strand me somewhere and no idea how I was going to get the alternator fixed. So I made a decision. With some help from my dad I am taking tomorrow off and I am getting my car to someone that can fix my car the same day. Then I will pay my dad back. Not a great plan, or a good one even but it is a plan.
Friday, April 27, 2007
Neighbors and my afternoon of AIN'T
It's that wonderful time of year again when the sky is not forecasting rain and the temperature nearly lulls you into never making it back from lunch. In fact today as Chad and I ate at a place called Naked Pizza we had to skip the accompanying beer because we feared that we would never go back to work. I knew that I would run the other direction with a beer, a beautiful day and cute girls walking by. It was hard enough going back with out the sweet nectar of a hop filled beverage! Really really super duper hard. I started daydreaming of my patio, a book and several beers waiting for me when I got off. I could see the perfection, I was totally in the daydream zone. Of course the inevitable happened I got stuck on a call and left twenty minutes late from work. I hit horrible traffic and my perfect day was marred. I made it home still dreaming of a chair, a beer, a book and a patio. Unfortunately the neighbors were outside. They are always outside it seems, being loud and taking up space. The kids I understand but the adults? Do they ever work? I opened the sliding glass door to get the air flowing through and along with a light breeze their voices came along. Sentences peppered with "ain't", ethnic slurs and just really bad grammar. It was a mix of redneck and Ebonics the likes I hope to never hear again. I shut my door and I dealt with the stuffy apartment and as soon as they disappeared I opened the door again but the day was gone, the perfect moment spoiled. On the bright side the cool air helped cool the place down. I started watching an "exciting program" that ended up being a rerun of a show aired two seasons ago that I had seen. Not a rerun of a show from this season which I pretty much have completely missed. No, a rerun that had already ran! I was trying to ease myself into it anyway to achieve the relaxation I had so perfectly envisioned earlier that day when the final nail was driven into this day and this apartment's coffin. A very tumultuous verbal exchange took place between a girl and a guy about another girl that had apparently been sparked by a comment. It was loud distracting and every bad word ever invented found it's way into the conversation, along with a boatload of "ain'ts". I was done. I have said that I am on the lookout for an apartment within a hundred dollars of my current rent. After that fight I meant it, I sent contact letters to places I have scoped out and I have been scoping out a lot more. I am hoping to be closer to work and to the area of town I always end up bar hopping. I figure killing two birds with one stone would be a good move on my part. I need to get away from this area and closer to where my small group of friends live and a place that could be a Max ride or a bicycle ride to as opposed to a mandatory car ride filled with irritation and inept drivers all around me. I plan on apartment hunting a little Sunday. All the office hours seem to work against me so I will probably do most of the searching this Wednesday. So wish me luck. I need to be away from this area and in the big town and closer to people I actually know and like hanging out with.
Another thing I have decided from my Jerry Springer cast that live near me is that I have to stop cussing altogether. I need to relegate it to the surprise exclamations, the pain filled moments and the extreme mental anguish periods. It makes you sound ten times stupider then you normally do and most of us can't afford to lose that many points. :)
Another thing I have decided from my Jerry Springer cast that live near me is that I have to stop cussing altogether. I need to relegate it to the surprise exclamations, the pain filled moments and the extreme mental anguish periods. It makes you sound ten times stupider then you normally do and most of us can't afford to lose that many points. :)
Monday, April 23, 2007
RTA 2007 WINNER!
Yeah you heard it here first! Amazingly coming back to beat all odds we have a winner of a 2007 Repetitive Task Award! Croc would you do the honors!
Croc: Thank you esteemed creator of me and this silly award show.... I would love to have a winner! I mean I certainly don't hate them for cutting into my beer drinking and pizza eating... not one bit! I swear I am not thinking of eating your chickens and stealing your horse in the middle of the night. Seriously. Anyway for the award of PAYING YOUR BILLS we are proud to announce Dale W as the winner. Wolf is standing by to read you his wonderful Thank you note, take it away Wolf!
Wolf: Thank you Croc! Dale wrote a heartrending acceptance speech that I am pleased to share with you today. Here it is! "Well, I hope this is not to late since I need free stuff. I am honored to be chosen in the Paying your Bills category. I have decided since I have finally been recognized for my bill paying skills I can retire from that job. Did you know if you roll bills real tight you can burn them in a billburning stove. They can not be opened. They burn hot!"
Croc: What? Wait did he just say he burns people named Bill in a stove?
Wolf: Is that what he was on about? I thought he was talking about a bloke named Bill Burningstove that was a real tight wad and never gave money to people.
Croc: Let me read it again.... "Well, I hope this is not too late since I need free stuff and I want to use up all of Croc's pizza and beer money because I am evil incarnate! I am honored to be chosen in the Paying Bill category and the stealing of pizza from the mouths of a starving Croc and ripping thirst quenching beer goodness from his palate. I have decided since I have finally been recognized for my Bill paying skills I can retire from that job because in addition to paying off Bill I have taken away all of Croc's hope and dreams because I am an actual beer thieving demon. Did you know if you roll Bill real tight you can burn him in a Bill burning stove just like the money I ripped from the grasp of Croc's favorite bartender and used to light a cigar with. They can not be opened, much like beer at the store can't be opened if you have no money to buy it. They burn hot just like Croc's beer craving throat!" Yep he is talking about burning Bill and taking away the world's beer one sad little Croc at a time! What a sadist!
Wolf: Yeah that is much worse then what I was imagining he said. So he gets a prize for burning people named Bill in a stove and taking away your beer?
Croc: That's what I was told! That he was the only winner! What a weird group, I think next year I will just wait for the Billboard Music Awards to invite me to be a host! Forget the 2nd annual RTA's! I am going to host for someone who will actually get a Croc a beer and a pizza... and perhaps a few Crockettes!
Wolf: Me Too! Except I want wolfettes and those drinks with the little umbrellas on them.
This Repetitive Tasks Award Ceremony has been brought to you by: Stoves for Burning Bill because that guy is a real jerk! And also to the Reelect Bill Burningstove to US Congress in 2008 campaign because he sure loves not spending your money and everyone needs a tightwad! And the guy who came up with the little umbrellas for your drinks, he loves your patronage so make it a mai tai!
Croc: Thank you esteemed creator of me and this silly award show.... I would love to have a winner! I mean I certainly don't hate them for cutting into my beer drinking and pizza eating... not one bit! I swear I am not thinking of eating your chickens and stealing your horse in the middle of the night. Seriously. Anyway for the award of PAYING YOUR BILLS we are proud to announce Dale W as the winner. Wolf is standing by to read you his wonderful Thank you note, take it away Wolf!
Wolf: Thank you Croc! Dale wrote a heartrending acceptance speech that I am pleased to share with you today. Here it is! "Well, I hope this is not to late since I need free stuff. I am honored to be chosen in the Paying your Bills category. I have decided since I have finally been recognized for my bill paying skills I can retire from that job. Did you know if you roll bills real tight you can burn them in a billburning stove. They can not be opened. They burn hot!"
Croc: What? Wait did he just say he burns people named Bill in a stove?
Wolf: Is that what he was on about? I thought he was talking about a bloke named Bill Burningstove that was a real tight wad and never gave money to people.
Croc: Let me read it again.... "Well, I hope this is not too late since I need free stuff and I want to use up all of Croc's pizza and beer money because I am evil incarnate! I am honored to be chosen in the Paying Bill category and the stealing of pizza from the mouths of a starving Croc and ripping thirst quenching beer goodness from his palate. I have decided since I have finally been recognized for my Bill paying skills I can retire from that job because in addition to paying off Bill I have taken away all of Croc's hope and dreams because I am an actual beer thieving demon. Did you know if you roll Bill real tight you can burn him in a Bill burning stove just like the money I ripped from the grasp of Croc's favorite bartender and used to light a cigar with. They can not be opened, much like beer at the store can't be opened if you have no money to buy it. They burn hot just like Croc's beer craving throat!" Yep he is talking about burning Bill and taking away the world's beer one sad little Croc at a time! What a sadist!
Wolf: Yeah that is much worse then what I was imagining he said. So he gets a prize for burning people named Bill in a stove and taking away your beer?
Croc: That's what I was told! That he was the only winner! What a weird group, I think next year I will just wait for the Billboard Music Awards to invite me to be a host! Forget the 2nd annual RTA's! I am going to host for someone who will actually get a Croc a beer and a pizza... and perhaps a few Crockettes!
Wolf: Me Too! Except I want wolfettes and those drinks with the little umbrellas on them.
This Repetitive Tasks Award Ceremony has been brought to you by: Stoves for Burning Bill because that guy is a real jerk! And also to the Reelect Bill Burningstove to US Congress in 2008 campaign because he sure loves not spending your money and everyone needs a tightwad! And the guy who came up with the little umbrellas for your drinks, he loves your patronage so make it a mai tai!
Sunday, April 22, 2007
RTA 2007 VICTORIOUS!!!!
It seems I have won my little protest and the original designs are available again.... I put the eBay shirt back out just to see if the fact that I took it off was the reason the mug reappeared.... We shall see!
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Censorship and a Protest!
I have been censored. I have been plugging away blogging and creating stupid Cafepress items for a year and then I get censored! Can you believe it? You probably want to know why but I can only tell you that two of my most recent images at Cafepress have been put under a red flag status meaning my items with the images can not be shown, sold or produced on any images by that company. The images are for the Repetitive Task Awards schwag! I was given no reason for the trampling of my rights. In fact they never bothered to even let me know they had been pulled from my shop. Not even a "This may violate such in such rule and we are pulling it until we can make a decision as to the validity of your images" email. So I am not sure if they will be cleared or what the big deal is. I have an idea but it only accounts for one of the images. The first on I am about to share is actually the one I don't get. Help me identify something wrong with it...
The second item may be the cause of the ban. I use the company eBay on the shirt. It is pretty innocent though. Judge for yourself!
SO I have decided to poke fun at this by creating a protest shirt. Check it out and then buy it!
Help me fight the man... at least until they pull this one too!
The second item may be the cause of the ban. I use the company eBay on the shirt. It is pretty innocent though. Judge for yourself!
SO I have decided to poke fun at this by creating a protest shirt. Check it out and then buy it!
Help me fight the man... at least until they pull this one too!
RTA REMINDER!!!!
Ok I know I asked you guys to write a thank you speech and I understand the incredible difficulty of the task but I have faith in each and everyone of you. It's for free stuff after all! I am sure you guiys like Happy Hour with free food and they make you buy a drink first! I am not asking for money.... unless you wanna give it to me. I am not even expecting you to be funny just a quick thank you speech. Tomorrow is the last day.... without one no prize! It's super easy! Just write "Thanks for the award now give me the free schwag!"
Sunday, April 15, 2007
The Repetitive Tasks Awards 2007
This program is sponsored by Crazed Lunatik Designs and other many fabulous organizations such as Mud On My Sneakers and Vomiting Green Records. Without further ado we introduce our hosts for the night Croc and Wolf!
Croc: Greetings Folks! Glad to be here today! It's a beautiful day outside here in lovely Portland! Woo I love you Portland you have been a great crowd!
Wolf: Croc! Slow your roll! We just got here the show just started and we have awards to give out! You can't leave!
Me: Yeah besides just a few of us are up here in Portland. Some people are in Phoenix, some in Roseburg and other spots in the world. In fact the protester is actually in Chicago.... which is probably why there is no picket line to cross to get in the doors. Now shut up and read your cue cards.
Croc: Wow.... real nice guy you are. Just because you draw me and write my words doesn't mean you control what I do! I know where you live! Seriously! I am so not playing! Lucky for you I am a showman and the show must go on.... so lets try this again. Greetings Folks! Glad to be here today! I am so glad we are here and not where all the rest of you are. Portland is having a nice day outside, the sun is shining and flowers are blooming.
Wolf: Not that we want to rub it in or anything.....
Croc: True! Anyway we are here today to honor the people who will never be rich, the common people. The sorry, the poor, the unwashed, you are my inspiration. You inspire me!
Wolf: Shut up Croc! Do you even look at the cue cards he wrote for you? This is a special day for the ordinary people not lazy poor people! I, for one, am glad that I could take part in this extremely pointless award show. I mean the pointlessness of this event is only barely less pointless than the Food Networks "Foodies" or ESPN's "Espys". It is at least as equal to the MTV Music/Movie Awards in pointless level. Don't even get me started on the other award shows... they suck. Wait do I have to say that? I love watching the red carpet reports and I love the music acts and the silly comedians that sold their souls to earn the right to host the show....
Me: Croc! Wolf! Don't make me erase you two! I kind of like you!
Croc: Like you would even dare! What an empty threat! You draw in pen!
Wolf: He has a point...
Me: Could you present the awards?
Croc: Actually, no... there are no acceptance speeches. Just a protest statement by your cousin in chi-town.
Wolf: Yeah didn't you tell them to get the speeches ready?
Me: Well yeah I guess I did. Hmmm.... I wonder why the speeches never came in?
Croc: I say we go out and drink up the award money!
Wolf: Actually I think you should give them another chance... because maybe they didn't know they had to have a speech to win.
Me: Well why wouldn't they? I told them that.
Croc: You're right you did tell them that! I smell beer and pizza in our near future!
Wolf: NO!!! Give them a week. Then if still nothing lets get that beer and pizza.
Me: Ok Wolf that sounds good to me. Dale, Maryann, Glenn, Pete S, Pat G and Crystal! You have one week left to actually get an award. You are the winners but I need an acceptance speech to spend the cash.
Wolf: Can I tell the surprise winner?
Me: Yeah go ahead.
Wolf: Robert W, what size shirt do you wear? You are the surprise award winner for most repetitive anti-award show poster! You are a wiener of a new RTA shirt! I meant winner, really!!
Croc: Woo! I love wieners with mustard and relish!
Me: Yes, wieners with mustard and relish are good... especially with some onion and a spot of ketchup... or is that catsup? The rest of you: ONE WEEK + ONE SPEECH = AN AWARD!
Croc: Greetings Folks! Glad to be here today! It's a beautiful day outside here in lovely Portland! Woo I love you Portland you have been a great crowd!
Wolf: Croc! Slow your roll! We just got here the show just started and we have awards to give out! You can't leave!
Me: Yeah besides just a few of us are up here in Portland. Some people are in Phoenix, some in Roseburg and other spots in the world. In fact the protester is actually in Chicago.... which is probably why there is no picket line to cross to get in the doors. Now shut up and read your cue cards.
Croc: Wow.... real nice guy you are. Just because you draw me and write my words doesn't mean you control what I do! I know where you live! Seriously! I am so not playing! Lucky for you I am a showman and the show must go on.... so lets try this again. Greetings Folks! Glad to be here today! I am so glad we are here and not where all the rest of you are. Portland is having a nice day outside, the sun is shining and flowers are blooming.
Wolf: Not that we want to rub it in or anything.....
Croc: True! Anyway we are here today to honor the people who will never be rich, the common people. The sorry, the poor, the unwashed, you are my inspiration. You inspire me!
Wolf: Shut up Croc! Do you even look at the cue cards he wrote for you? This is a special day for the ordinary people not lazy poor people! I, for one, am glad that I could take part in this extremely pointless award show. I mean the pointlessness of this event is only barely less pointless than the Food Networks "Foodies" or ESPN's "Espys". It is at least as equal to the MTV Music/Movie Awards in pointless level. Don't even get me started on the other award shows... they suck. Wait do I have to say that? I love watching the red carpet reports and I love the music acts and the silly comedians that sold their souls to earn the right to host the show....
Me: Croc! Wolf! Don't make me erase you two! I kind of like you!
Croc: Like you would even dare! What an empty threat! You draw in pen!
Wolf: He has a point...
Me: Could you present the awards?
Croc: Actually, no... there are no acceptance speeches. Just a protest statement by your cousin in chi-town.
Wolf: Yeah didn't you tell them to get the speeches ready?
Me: Well yeah I guess I did. Hmmm.... I wonder why the speeches never came in?
Croc: I say we go out and drink up the award money!
Wolf: Actually I think you should give them another chance... because maybe they didn't know they had to have a speech to win.
Me: Well why wouldn't they? I told them that.
Croc: You're right you did tell them that! I smell beer and pizza in our near future!
Wolf: NO!!! Give them a week. Then if still nothing lets get that beer and pizza.
Me: Ok Wolf that sounds good to me. Dale, Maryann, Glenn, Pete S, Pat G and Crystal! You have one week left to actually get an award. You are the winners but I need an acceptance speech to spend the cash.
Wolf: Can I tell the surprise winner?
Me: Yeah go ahead.
Wolf: Robert W, what size shirt do you wear? You are the surprise award winner for most repetitive anti-award show poster! You are a wiener of a new RTA shirt! I meant winner, really!!
Croc: Woo! I love wieners with mustard and relish!
Me: Yes, wieners with mustard and relish are good... especially with some onion and a spot of ketchup... or is that catsup? The rest of you: ONE WEEK + ONE SPEECH = AN AWARD!
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Repetitive Task Awards Revealed
I have set up a shop where you can get some Repetitive Task Awards merchandise. It is all brilliant and hastily made. Rejoice in you consumeristic natures. Get you RTA 2007 swag now!
A Quick Repetitive Tasks Award Show Update
Due to unforeseen circumstances this show has been delayed but the wait is over! Sunday the awards show shall happen! It will be hosted on this very blog by two of the soon to be fun and exciting characters known as Wolf and Croc! Some of you have met them before and some have not but soon very soon they will be introduced. Try Sunday! Then after that their many adventures should start airing on this very blog! (As long as I figure out how to do that... anyone who knows how to do more then basic html can take part in my newest project. I would love any help or advice! Contact me if you are interested by email or by posting here.) Anyway the awards show has an exciting prize for the winner of each of the following categories. I hope the nominees have their speeches ready. Do not make Wolf or Croc do the speech for you they are notoriously bad at social responsibilities and it may result in embarrassment. In addition to the yet to be revealed prizes I have a yet to be revealed winner and category. If that is not the hook of all hooks! Here are the nominees and their respective categories (betcha can't guess who will win!):
Paying Your Bills Award
Dale W
Bad Music Lover Award
Glenn S
The Night Snorer Award
Maryann S
Daily Showering Award
Pete S
Deleting Spam Emails Award
Pat G (she even has to delete Spam emails at work)
Phone Call Transfer Award
Crystal H (She spent most of a day transferring incoming calls to other departments)
PS DON'T FORGET TO SCROLL DOWN!
Paying Your Bills Award
Dale W
Bad Music Lover Award
Glenn S
The Night Snorer Award
Maryann S
Daily Showering Award
Pete S
Deleting Spam Emails Award
Pat G (she even has to delete Spam emails at work)
Phone Call Transfer Award
Crystal H (She spent most of a day transferring incoming calls to other departments)
PS DON'T FORGET TO SCROLL DOWN!
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Memorial Benches..... The Return of
You blindly logged on today thinking "Wow I wonder what Mike is complaining about today? Is it school, the job, a co-worker, a dumb movie, hackey sacking? I must know!" Then you get here and I am complaining about Memorial benches at the nearby park again. It makes you wonder why anyone would be allowed to blog at will...
Set all your dashed dreams and hopes aside I am ready to begin my story. So I have been taking walks when the weather permits again. They are still doing major construction at my park so I photograph the heck out of the nearby rose garden. I stopped harassing the old people and the retirement center unless I need a flushing toilet... So it occurred to me to look at the various plaques on the memorial benches in the memorial rose garden. I was amazed at some of the things I found so I photographed them to bring back to you. Keep in mind that I do not want a memorial bench when I kick the bucket, I would rather have a tree planted or a strip mall bulldozed in my name...
This is my rose garden. I may not own it but I love spending time there. The gazebo in the background is pretty nice but I never see it in use. They rent the place out to functions supposedly but it does not host local music or anything nifty. Which is a downright shame. We shall start the bench tour a wee bit on the inane side...
I am not sure if these people are dead but if any of my 'Friends' buy me a bench it better say something a lot more clever then that! I am actually offended that someone wasted money on this. If I knew these 'Friends' I would so own their behinds it is not even funny!
What exactly does this saying mean? This is the biggest bunch of hooey in the world. I feel like finding out how to start a Night of the Living Dead scenario just so this memorialized person can eat this dedicators brains. I mean they are not using them as this stupid memorial plaque can attest too! Really what does that mean "Time takes all but love and truth"? But that's not what it means it distinctly means to blathe, and as we all know to blathe means to bluff. Heh, so they were probably playing cards and he cheated...
"Liar! Liar! LI-AR!"
Get back witch!
"I'm not a witch I'm your wife but after what you just said I'm not even sure I want to be that anymore!"
You never had it so good! Wait! Somehow I twisted this into a Miracle Max and Valerie quote from the movie The Princess Bride. The twists my writing unexpectedly tape... and just because I ran out at 10 Pm at night to buy the movie to get the quote right have nothing to do with lessening the spontaneity.
Just so we are all clear 'clinge' is not a word. Cling, clingy, clinger, clinginess is a word and clingier and clingiest are even words but 'clinge' is not. The closest we come is a Dutch town called Clinge. It is in the province of Zeeland. It lies about 28 km southwest of Bergen op Zoom. Clinge is located on the Dutch-Belgian border and joins with the Belgian town of De Klinge, a border that can normally be freely crossed. The town consists of about 1447 inhabitants according to a report taken back in 2001. (The information in italics is taken and summarized from Encyclopedia.com) So what I am trying to say is that the 'Clinge' the plaque uses is not actually spelled right.... just to double check try to fit in "Clinge a Dutch town in the province of Zeeland". I will do it for you: "I will Clinge, a Dutch town in the province of Zeeland, to the old rugged cross and exchange it someday for a crown" It does not make much sense does it? So I guess nothing beats purchasing a plaque and then misspelling an easy to spell word like cling. You probably are thinking Mike you misspell words all the time but hey I didn't pay to put the misspellings there I did it all for free.
This one really boils my blood! I absolutely hate this plaque. Let's read it together: "When the past meets the future stop and smell the roses...." Ok you guys go first what does this mean? I have had fortune cookies in Chinese characters make more sense then this. I could understand Sanskrit before I could tell you what the goal of this saying was. It was like a computer crash happened and this saying should have been two different plaques but the crash melded them together! I just want to let Mickey and his half-wit family know that I am ready for a fight on this one! Your stupid plaque has bothered me for days already and if I don't kick a little tail over this I will utter this utterly retarded phrase on my deathbed and like Citizen Kane's last words people will be like "What the crap did that mean!" (Direct quote from the movie I swear!)
This one is my favorite! GO ahead click on it and make it a wee bit larger. If you do so you will see that the plaque was installed upside down. That has appealed to my very core so I have claimed this bench as my own. Every time I walk into the rose garden to take a seat I head for this bench and have a seat. To me this is the best way that any one was memorialized in the garden because it stood out.
Some of you may remember that I once had a bench in here dedicated to me from the Milwaukie Seniors. That can be seen by clicking here: Mike's Bench! Unfortunately Mary's bench has pushed me out of the garden but I am happy to say that I was not forgotten in the reorganization attempts. I have my very own little room dedicated to me as the photo below illustrates:
Yep and there you have it! Always the most popular bench in the house! I have people come into the park just to sit on my bench! My dedicated bench even has several repeat performances from the local construction crew! Flies also like to gravitate towards my new bench! Man, I never thought my bench would gain in popularity by moving it out of the garden! Maybe if you come and visit you can enjoy the many pleasures of my new and improved bench! You should only be so lucky!
Hope you enjoyed my return to memorial benches! OH AND WRITE A FREAKING COMMENT EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE PEOPLE! This excludes Robert because he actually comments on a frequent basis so he can be choosy about when and where to add his comments.
Set all your dashed dreams and hopes aside I am ready to begin my story. So I have been taking walks when the weather permits again. They are still doing major construction at my park so I photograph the heck out of the nearby rose garden. I stopped harassing the old people and the retirement center unless I need a flushing toilet... So it occurred to me to look at the various plaques on the memorial benches in the memorial rose garden. I was amazed at some of the things I found so I photographed them to bring back to you. Keep in mind that I do not want a memorial bench when I kick the bucket, I would rather have a tree planted or a strip mall bulldozed in my name...
This is my rose garden. I may not own it but I love spending time there. The gazebo in the background is pretty nice but I never see it in use. They rent the place out to functions supposedly but it does not host local music or anything nifty. Which is a downright shame. We shall start the bench tour a wee bit on the inane side...
I am not sure if these people are dead but if any of my 'Friends' buy me a bench it better say something a lot more clever then that! I am actually offended that someone wasted money on this. If I knew these 'Friends' I would so own their behinds it is not even funny!
What exactly does this saying mean? This is the biggest bunch of hooey in the world. I feel like finding out how to start a Night of the Living Dead scenario just so this memorialized person can eat this dedicators brains. I mean they are not using them as this stupid memorial plaque can attest too! Really what does that mean "Time takes all but love and truth"? But that's not what it means it distinctly means to blathe, and as we all know to blathe means to bluff. Heh, so they were probably playing cards and he cheated...
"Liar! Liar! LI-AR!"
Get back witch!
"I'm not a witch I'm your wife but after what you just said I'm not even sure I want to be that anymore!"
You never had it so good! Wait! Somehow I twisted this into a Miracle Max and Valerie quote from the movie The Princess Bride. The twists my writing unexpectedly tape... and just because I ran out at 10 Pm at night to buy the movie to get the quote right have nothing to do with lessening the spontaneity.
Just so we are all clear 'clinge' is not a word. Cling, clingy, clinger, clinginess is a word and clingier and clingiest are even words but 'clinge' is not. The closest we come is a Dutch town called Clinge. It is in the province of Zeeland. It lies about 28 km southwest of Bergen op Zoom. Clinge is located on the Dutch-Belgian border and joins with the Belgian town of De Klinge, a border that can normally be freely crossed. The town consists of about 1447 inhabitants according to a report taken back in 2001. (The information in italics is taken and summarized from Encyclopedia.com) So what I am trying to say is that the 'Clinge' the plaque uses is not actually spelled right.... just to double check try to fit in "Clinge a Dutch town in the province of Zeeland". I will do it for you: "I will Clinge, a Dutch town in the province of Zeeland, to the old rugged cross and exchange it someday for a crown" It does not make much sense does it? So I guess nothing beats purchasing a plaque and then misspelling an easy to spell word like cling. You probably are thinking Mike you misspell words all the time but hey I didn't pay to put the misspellings there I did it all for free.
This one really boils my blood! I absolutely hate this plaque. Let's read it together: "When the past meets the future stop and smell the roses...." Ok you guys go first what does this mean? I have had fortune cookies in Chinese characters make more sense then this. I could understand Sanskrit before I could tell you what the goal of this saying was. It was like a computer crash happened and this saying should have been two different plaques but the crash melded them together! I just want to let Mickey and his half-wit family know that I am ready for a fight on this one! Your stupid plaque has bothered me for days already and if I don't kick a little tail over this I will utter this utterly retarded phrase on my deathbed and like Citizen Kane's last words people will be like "What the crap did that mean!" (Direct quote from the movie I swear!)
This one is my favorite! GO ahead click on it and make it a wee bit larger. If you do so you will see that the plaque was installed upside down. That has appealed to my very core so I have claimed this bench as my own. Every time I walk into the rose garden to take a seat I head for this bench and have a seat. To me this is the best way that any one was memorialized in the garden because it stood out.
Some of you may remember that I once had a bench in here dedicated to me from the Milwaukie Seniors. That can be seen by clicking here: Mike's Bench! Unfortunately Mary's bench has pushed me out of the garden but I am happy to say that I was not forgotten in the reorganization attempts. I have my very own little room dedicated to me as the photo below illustrates:
Yep and there you have it! Always the most popular bench in the house! I have people come into the park just to sit on my bench! My dedicated bench even has several repeat performances from the local construction crew! Flies also like to gravitate towards my new bench! Man, I never thought my bench would gain in popularity by moving it out of the garden! Maybe if you come and visit you can enjoy the many pleasures of my new and improved bench! You should only be so lucky!
Hope you enjoyed my return to memorial benches! OH AND WRITE A FREAKING COMMENT EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE PEOPLE! This excludes Robert because he actually comments on a frequent basis so he can be choosy about when and where to add his comments.
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
The Class Kiss-Up
Yesterday was a very long day.... a very long day. Even before my first break I was looking at the clock saying why is the time creeping by? What have I done to deserve the longest day ever? Why are all these people mad at me? What is wrong with these people? I want to just go home! The break flew by as did my lunch and the second break but the rest of the day creeped by. I would be on a call for 5 minutes and I felt like it had went on for an hour. The calls were killing me. To make it worse my continuing education class was after work so I had no escape. I have to take continuing education classes to stay licensed to be an insurance person in Oregon. I had an hour from the time I got off work until the time my class started and I ran away. Some people suggested I work the extra hour and get overtime but I was barely managing my scheduled time. The other thing is even if I had I would not get overtime pay... they have us work 7.75 hour days so the first hour and 15 you only total 40 so why work another hour for regular pay when I felt like stabbing people? So I took off and I went to an art store and perused. Then I purchased a cup of coffee at a coffee shop and sat down to peruse a magazine and next thing I know it's time for the class. I headed back to work for a super long 3 hour class. I am going to tell you all a shocking secret, insurance is boring. It really is and although the instructor does her best to make it engaging it simply doesn't work. Knowing this I tend to draw a lot. I was working on my latest epic comic story when I ran out of paper and we were only 30 minutes in. About the same time as that a guy has hit everyone's radar as the class kiss up. He has a comment for everything the instructor says. She says "The.." and he would say "Yep, that's exactly the way it is." He had been in several of my previous classes and I already hated him as did everybody I know. I am not sure how the people I don't know felt about him before then but before the first hour was over I could tell everybody was on the same page, well maybe there is an exception of two minor kiss-ups who seem to think their comments mean something to their peers. What is it that drives someone to chime in every 15 seconds? I mean it's not like you make the class more fun with your stupid insights or your incredibly lame jokes. Who does that?
The main problem I was facing was that I was without a distraction which tends to get dangerous. So I start writing comments here and there to my co-worker and we slowly start having a covert conversation on paper. We talk about the "Commenter" and his lack of friends. We talk about things she says every time we are in a class, because she always teaches and her stories always end up in the same places. We finally got a much needed break and we bought soda to try and get the sugar and caffeine to help us get through the next hour.
In the second hour the things they are saying, because now the Commenter has turned the class into a conversation because every thought she expresses brings out a story from him and it is officially 'they' talking instead of her teaching. Anyway every stray word brings about another little conversation on our papers. I draw representations of the kiss-ups saying stupid things and my wolf and croc characters talking crap. We take apart every comment the Commenter makes. We also start taking words or phrases and running wild with them, at one point it almost causes my cohort to burst out laughing. We slow down for a bit and a second break is finally called.
When we come back we notice our paper talking has spread through the class and no one is listening. We are all writing hateful notes about the commenter and soon people are no longer even feigning interest if he speaks. It gets to the point that when he starts talking the room erupts into idle chat with neighbors. Except the two of us, we keep it on paper. We pretend to be listening even though we have no clue what is being said. Then another written comment about the word redlining almost gets both of us to laugh out loud again... I had to make a weak cover with a cough to make up for my less then quiet snicker. The Commenter continued to chime in as if he has no idea we all wish he would be violently flung from the earth and he might not have any idea. I start tallying every time he chimes in with a comment which adds up quickly. I give up after 15 minutes because the tally mark is ridiculously huge meanwhile my partner in crime is marking every time certain words are said and it is just getting silly. Finally our duty is done and the gates open and we are paroled from this prison. As we leave we make barbed comments about the guy hoping some will stick into his side like a prison shank. Some vow to never sign up for the night class because of him. Others talk of signing up for online courses. Either way no one wants to sit through that again. Even the nicest people reveal looks of hatred when he is mentioned. Maybe next time we will have prison style shanks that are fashioned from all the free knick knacks the company gives out to boost morale and we will leave the barbed comments unsaid and we will scatter leaving him slowly dying and no one will have seen anything....
The main problem I was facing was that I was without a distraction which tends to get dangerous. So I start writing comments here and there to my co-worker and we slowly start having a covert conversation on paper. We talk about the "Commenter" and his lack of friends. We talk about things she says every time we are in a class, because she always teaches and her stories always end up in the same places. We finally got a much needed break and we bought soda to try and get the sugar and caffeine to help us get through the next hour.
In the second hour the things they are saying, because now the Commenter has turned the class into a conversation because every thought she expresses brings out a story from him and it is officially 'they' talking instead of her teaching. Anyway every stray word brings about another little conversation on our papers. I draw representations of the kiss-ups saying stupid things and my wolf and croc characters talking crap. We take apart every comment the Commenter makes. We also start taking words or phrases and running wild with them, at one point it almost causes my cohort to burst out laughing. We slow down for a bit and a second break is finally called.
When we come back we notice our paper talking has spread through the class and no one is listening. We are all writing hateful notes about the commenter and soon people are no longer even feigning interest if he speaks. It gets to the point that when he starts talking the room erupts into idle chat with neighbors. Except the two of us, we keep it on paper. We pretend to be listening even though we have no clue what is being said. Then another written comment about the word redlining almost gets both of us to laugh out loud again... I had to make a weak cover with a cough to make up for my less then quiet snicker. The Commenter continued to chime in as if he has no idea we all wish he would be violently flung from the earth and he might not have any idea. I start tallying every time he chimes in with a comment which adds up quickly. I give up after 15 minutes because the tally mark is ridiculously huge meanwhile my partner in crime is marking every time certain words are said and it is just getting silly. Finally our duty is done and the gates open and we are paroled from this prison. As we leave we make barbed comments about the guy hoping some will stick into his side like a prison shank. Some vow to never sign up for the night class because of him. Others talk of signing up for online courses. Either way no one wants to sit through that again. Even the nicest people reveal looks of hatred when he is mentioned. Maybe next time we will have prison style shanks that are fashioned from all the free knick knacks the company gives out to boost morale and we will leave the barbed comments unsaid and we will scatter leaving him slowly dying and no one will have seen anything....
Monday, April 02, 2007
Blossoms and Blue Sky Update
I added 8 pictures from my Goodwill camera. If you already looked go back and look again! I picked the best of the pictures, I was being choosy.
http://www.angelfire.com/droid/crazedlunatikdesigns/BlossomsandBlueSky/
Go to Blossoms And Blue Sky NOW!!
http://www.angelfire.com/droid/crazedlunatikdesigns/BlossomsandBlueSky/
Go to Blossoms And Blue Sky NOW!!
The Fall Out
You may have read my blogs on the Art Institute Online and seen my latest spat and the email I sent. Here is what happened after that email.
I received a call from my academic adviser so I call her back.
"Hi Michelle this is Michael Williams. I am returning your call."
Michelle: "Hi Michael, I received your email. You have to take math if you want to continue in your degree program it is part of the core requirements. Without it you can't submit a portfolio to be allowed into the program."
Me: "I am not taking math. I have already taken math courses that are steps beyond the ones you want me to take. I am not paying to take math from you guys."
Michelle: "The only class I see is Calculus and it doesn't have a grade."
Me: I am not talking about calculus, I am talking about trigonometry and college algebra. I took the last math class because at the time I was thinking there might be a work around for the future but I was out of time and I still wanted to be in school. This time I rejected the schedule you sent me but I was enrolled anyhow."
Michelle: "You have to take this math because you placed there."
Me: "No I didn't I never took a placement test because I sent my credits and the school decided to ignore them."
Michelle: "Oh yeah. You did not take the placement test so that is why you have to take this class."
Me: "I am not taking this class. Can you work another class in instead."
Michelle: "You have to take the class."
Me: "No I don't. I have already taken more then enough math to fulfill the requirements. I am not taking anymore math. It is not my fault you don't accept accredited collegiate transcripts."
Michelle: "I only see the calculus and that didn't transfer there is no grade."
Me: "I sent transcripts from four schools! Stop looking at NAU and look at Rio Salado Community College."
Michelle: "I see a Speech class and an English class."
Me: "That is Mesa Community look at Rio Salado's transcript."
Michelle: "I don't see it we must not have got it."
Me: "Hmmm... that is funny, all those emails I have sent and you just decide to look at my grade transcripts now? Andi was able to view those transcripts when I had this conversation with her last December. She was not able to tell me why they did not transfer but she could see the transcript. Why did she find them but you can't? Did they get lost or is someone lying to me? They were sent and they more then fulfill these core classes requirement nonesense."
Michelle: Blah blah blah problem...
Me: "The problem I am having here is that you and everyone else I talk to is more interested in pointing out how everything is my fault and not the schools instead of trying to fix an error. It doesn't matter who made it I am trying to get you to fix it, you and this school have the power and pretending you don't is just stupid. I have taken math before and I can do math circles around the math you want me to take but I should not have to take it because I already have fulfilled this requirement. Are you going to help me to at least put math off for now until I can get someone to help me out?"
Michelle: "Well you did not do a credit challenge."
Me: "I never knew I could until it was too late."
Michelle: "Well that was in the enrollment packet you should have known about it. It was in the enrollment package."
Me: "What enrollment package? I have no idea what you mean. I never got an enrollment package in the mail. I started school before my transcripts had arrived so how was I going to challenge anything?"
Michelle: "You got the enrollment package and it was in there."
Me: "The problem I am having right now has nothing to do with this. I want to take a different course then the one I am signed up for and I am looking for options. I feel like the class can be at least put off until I can figure how to get my prior courses accepted."
Michelle: "You have to complete the math and it is too late for the credit challenge. You have to take the class."
Me: "You know what.... no I don't. I am done with this conversation and I just want you to un-enroll me from this school."
Michelle: "I sent you an email link to a form you have to fill out and then I will process the paperwork."
Me: "Thanks and have an oh so lovely day."
The e-mail was sent 2 hours before I called her so it explains why she was a wee hostile. She never tried to work with me. I spend all day doing my best to work with people that "Never got a bill" and had their insurance lapse so I know everything can be worked around regardless of fault. I was trying to let them find a solution so that they could continue to take a ridiculous amount of money for crappy classes with no actual work on their part. I mean really I do all the reading by myself and I have to wait at least 12 hours for answers to my questions so I am doing it alone and the classes suck. The only thing the do is grade stuff all of the test are graded automatically so it is just the subjective busy work. I should start an online school...
I received a call from my academic adviser so I call her back.
"Hi Michelle this is Michael Williams. I am returning your call."
Michelle: "Hi Michael, I received your email. You have to take math if you want to continue in your degree program it is part of the core requirements. Without it you can't submit a portfolio to be allowed into the program."
Me: "I am not taking math. I have already taken math courses that are steps beyond the ones you want me to take. I am not paying to take math from you guys."
Michelle: "The only class I see is Calculus and it doesn't have a grade."
Me: I am not talking about calculus, I am talking about trigonometry and college algebra. I took the last math class because at the time I was thinking there might be a work around for the future but I was out of time and I still wanted to be in school. This time I rejected the schedule you sent me but I was enrolled anyhow."
Michelle: "You have to take this math because you placed there."
Me: "No I didn't I never took a placement test because I sent my credits and the school decided to ignore them."
Michelle: "Oh yeah. You did not take the placement test so that is why you have to take this class."
Me: "I am not taking this class. Can you work another class in instead."
Michelle: "You have to take the class."
Me: "No I don't. I have already taken more then enough math to fulfill the requirements. I am not taking anymore math. It is not my fault you don't accept accredited collegiate transcripts."
Michelle: "I only see the calculus and that didn't transfer there is no grade."
Me: "I sent transcripts from four schools! Stop looking at NAU and look at Rio Salado Community College."
Michelle: "I see a Speech class and an English class."
Me: "That is Mesa Community look at Rio Salado's transcript."
Michelle: "I don't see it we must not have got it."
Me: "Hmmm... that is funny, all those emails I have sent and you just decide to look at my grade transcripts now? Andi was able to view those transcripts when I had this conversation with her last December. She was not able to tell me why they did not transfer but she could see the transcript. Why did she find them but you can't? Did they get lost or is someone lying to me? They were sent and they more then fulfill these core classes requirement nonesense."
Michelle: Blah blah blah problem...
Me: "The problem I am having here is that you and everyone else I talk to is more interested in pointing out how everything is my fault and not the schools instead of trying to fix an error. It doesn't matter who made it I am trying to get you to fix it, you and this school have the power and pretending you don't is just stupid. I have taken math before and I can do math circles around the math you want me to take but I should not have to take it because I already have fulfilled this requirement. Are you going to help me to at least put math off for now until I can get someone to help me out?"
Michelle: "Well you did not do a credit challenge."
Me: "I never knew I could until it was too late."
Michelle: "Well that was in the enrollment packet you should have known about it. It was in the enrollment package."
Me: "What enrollment package? I have no idea what you mean. I never got an enrollment package in the mail. I started school before my transcripts had arrived so how was I going to challenge anything?"
Michelle: "You got the enrollment package and it was in there."
Me: "The problem I am having right now has nothing to do with this. I want to take a different course then the one I am signed up for and I am looking for options. I feel like the class can be at least put off until I can figure how to get my prior courses accepted."
Michelle: "You have to complete the math and it is too late for the credit challenge. You have to take the class."
Me: "You know what.... no I don't. I am done with this conversation and I just want you to un-enroll me from this school."
Michelle: "I sent you an email link to a form you have to fill out and then I will process the paperwork."
Me: "Thanks and have an oh so lovely day."
The e-mail was sent 2 hours before I called her so it explains why she was a wee hostile. She never tried to work with me. I spend all day doing my best to work with people that "Never got a bill" and had their insurance lapse so I know everything can be worked around regardless of fault. I was trying to let them find a solution so that they could continue to take a ridiculous amount of money for crappy classes with no actual work on their part. I mean really I do all the reading by myself and I have to wait at least 12 hours for answers to my questions so I am doing it alone and the classes suck. The only thing the do is grade stuff all of the test are graded automatically so it is just the subjective busy work. I should start an online school...
Sunday, April 01, 2007
New Photos
Hey all!
Two posts in one day???? Good lord I am crazy! Don't worry it won't be a new trend. I just wanted to let you know that I have a new photo set up it is called Blossoms and Blue Sky. It has several pictures with my new digital camera. The main focus is tree blossoms but I fit in a great shot of my new SLR camera (the Goodwill one) and a pretty funny sign I spied a while back. Some of the photos are pretty amazing so make sure you check it out.
http://www.angelfire.com/droid/crazedlunatikdesigns/BlossomsandBlueSky/
In other news the Goodwill camera works beautifully. I will share some examples with you later. I am waiting on a cd to be burned for me. the company I took it to had a problem with their burner and neglected to tell me but I can wait I was ecstatic to find out my camera works. I have the prints at home and some were pretty good. My main focus was on taking a roll of film and not really setting up a great shot but I managed a few good shots anyhow.
Don't forget to check out Blossoms and Blue Sky!
Two posts in one day???? Good lord I am crazy! Don't worry it won't be a new trend. I just wanted to let you know that I have a new photo set up it is called Blossoms and Blue Sky. It has several pictures with my new digital camera. The main focus is tree blossoms but I fit in a great shot of my new SLR camera (the Goodwill one) and a pretty funny sign I spied a while back. Some of the photos are pretty amazing so make sure you check it out.
http://www.angelfire.com/droid/crazedlunatikdesigns/BlossomsandBlueSky/
In other news the Goodwill camera works beautifully. I will share some examples with you later. I am waiting on a cd to be burned for me. the company I took it to had a problem with their burner and neglected to tell me but I can wait I was ecstatic to find out my camera works. I have the prints at home and some were pretty good. My main focus was on taking a roll of film and not really setting up a great shot but I managed a few good shots anyhow.
Don't forget to check out Blossoms and Blue Sky!
My Favorite Comic Strip
Pearls Before Swine is my favorite comic strip at the moment. It is drawn by Stephen Pastis. I am including my favorite of a recent series where pig (who is not an alcoholic) goes to an alcoholics retreat for a vacation and becomes Britney's best friend. Hopefully posting it won't get me in trouble!
Friday, March 30, 2007
Art Institute Online Sucks Rancid Bong Water
You may remember that I am enrolled in a little school known as Art Institute Online. For some odd reason Art Institute online will not accept my math courses I took at Rio Salado Community college and request I take super expensive courses from them. The funny thing is that same community college is where I took English 101 and that class was accepted. So it is not the college they object to. I have tried talking to people but they are all retarded monkey poo throwers. I took one class because there is a lot of money going to them from the government and I was not sure what to do. So in two semesters and 4 classes I have eaked out 1 artistic course. The rest have been stupid. The math class was Math 99..... I never bought a book and I got an A. This class is Math 100 and they sent me the schedule and asked me to approve it I declined the classes and when asked I told them I was not taking math from them ever. I was told "but you have to have math courses because you want to be in the degree program and in order to qualify to show your portfolio. In order to show your portfolio you have to have a foundation which includes math." I responded "No actually I don't. I could care less about showing them my portfolio and I could care less about the degree. I have taken math classes that are steps beyond the courses you ask me to take so I already qualify. Enroll me in another class and drop the math, I am not taking math from you" The response was a phone call that I was being unclear about what I wanted them to do. So I emailed saying fine unenroll me from this school and return the money already paid to you. The response this time was an email telling me that Math 100 begins on Monday. So even though I did not approve this schedule I got this schedule so I wrote up a nice little letter and thought I would share it.
Michelle,
It seems that denying my schedule means nothing to anyone over there so why does it ask if I just get stuck in the class anyway? I have taken math that supersedes this course. I took the classes in an accredited community college. Other accredited colleges have recognized my two math courses without a second glance. I am sorry that other accredited math courses do not match your system but I am not paying for another math class I did it once already against my will but this time it simply isn't happening. Withdraw me from the class. I already denied this schedule and I am sorry that you do not understand what I mean when I say that I am not taking another math class with you guys, that is not my problem. I have not been vague or indirect about this. Just in case you believe I am still being unclear let me put it out for you.
I am not taking Math 100. I have denied the schedule you made for me and suggested that if you wanted to keep me in school you could suggest other courses and maybe a non-degree related program because I believe strongly enough to drop out over having to take math classes that I have already taken before. I have no intention in showing up on Monday for the first day or any other day of the week for that matter. I am dropping this class. I would love to be switched to another class that has something artistic to teach. Otherwise return the money to the government. SO yes either get a new class for me or pull me out of your school. There it is.
Thank you,
Michael Williams
Email: crazedlunatik@gmail.com
Url: www.crazedlunatikdesigns.com
Michelle,
It seems that denying my schedule means nothing to anyone over there so why does it ask if I just get stuck in the class anyway? I have taken math that supersedes this course. I took the classes in an accredited community college. Other accredited colleges have recognized my two math courses without a second glance. I am sorry that other accredited math courses do not match your system but I am not paying for another math class I did it once already against my will but this time it simply isn't happening. Withdraw me from the class. I already denied this schedule and I am sorry that you do not understand what I mean when I say that I am not taking another math class with you guys, that is not my problem. I have not been vague or indirect about this. Just in case you believe I am still being unclear let me put it out for you.
I am not taking Math 100. I have denied the schedule you made for me and suggested that if you wanted to keep me in school you could suggest other courses and maybe a non-degree related program because I believe strongly enough to drop out over having to take math classes that I have already taken before. I have no intention in showing up on Monday for the first day or any other day of the week for that matter. I am dropping this class. I would love to be switched to another class that has something artistic to teach. Otherwise return the money to the government. SO yes either get a new class for me or pull me out of your school. There it is.
Thank you,
Michael Williams
Email: crazedlunatik@gmail.com
Url: www.crazedlunatikdesigns.com
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Wacky Wednesday
My dad drove down for a visit Tuesday night. He was able to get my car's breaks worked on and decided to take some time off and head up North to hang out on my day off. We had a nice time. We went to Old Chicago when he got into town so that we could grab a bite and a pint. Then headed home to catch some z's. The next morning we had breakfast at a local place called Sully's. It's a little pricey but there Hollandaise sauce for the eggs Benedict was fantastic. Then we headed to Barnes & Noble to read for a few hours. Then Maryjo called for us to head out to a lady's house that had an old horse that she was getting rid of. The horse looked like a horse, an old horse but a horse none the less. His name was Sid and he used to jump with the Lady's daughter in law competitively. She had outgrown the horse and the horse was just too old to keep doing the stuff so she wanted him to go to a good home. Maryjo desires to be that home.... I have a theory that she plans to start an old horse retirement home. Anyway Sid was friendly and let me touch him and he seemed nice enough. So who knows maybe Maryjo will have an old horse named Sid in the near future. After that mountain of excitement we headed back to my side of town and traded my dads old gift certificate from around 6 years ago in for a new one and then we shopped around and got a few things. My dad got a watch, some easter candy and a new steering wheel cover for my car.
Right about here the day seemed to be right for a beer and a cigar. We wandered over to Cascade Cigar and Tobacco and bought an Acid cigar called a Blondie. Then headed into their bar and had a beer and a smoke. It was a nice relaxing time. My dad and I were hungry at this point so we headed over to Buster's Barbecue and had a pretty good meal. Then we wandered around looking for shoes at Big 5. Although they had bargains the size he wears were always out and he has some weird desire to not get tennis shoes. I had a car load of stuff in my car all set to be given away so we went to Goodwill. I glanced in the window and saw a bunch of cool looking things so after giving a bunch of stuff away I went in to look for other stuff to take home. My goal was to get a nice storage unit for the kitchen. I need shelves because I have a big pantry and no shelves. I ended up finding a few cool things in there but nothing I really had to have. I wanted a Polaroid camera I saw being sold for 4 dollars enough to get it. As I headed to the front I saw a display case with decent cameras and other electronics that might walk away in someone's pocket a lot faster then a bulky Polaroid camera. I was looking at the case that had some cool stuff when I saw an old large case tucked behind a flat screen computer monitor. It turned out to be an old slr camera with 3 lens made by Mamiyo/Sekor for $40. I decided to buy it and I am absolutely buzzing about trying this thing out! I loaded film in it and I plan on taking this thing out this weekend to take some pictures. I will also use the digital camera my mom gave me (thanks mom) to take some pictures of the new camera. It takes film so it may be a week or so before I can get pictures made to show you. Who knows maybe they won't be worth showing. Of course I hope they are.
After that we headed to look at shoes at GI Joe's where my dad's tiny feet once again denied him the righteous feeling of bargain priced shoes. From there we headed to Barnes and Noble to read for a few more hours and for my dad to find books to buy with his other gift card. Then the night had to end... boo! I found myself at work today and wanting to go home and play with my new camera and my new guitar but instead In was at work making sure I didn't have to live in my car using my guitar case as a sleeping bag......
Right about here the day seemed to be right for a beer and a cigar. We wandered over to Cascade Cigar and Tobacco and bought an Acid cigar called a Blondie. Then headed into their bar and had a beer and a smoke. It was a nice relaxing time. My dad and I were hungry at this point so we headed over to Buster's Barbecue and had a pretty good meal. Then we wandered around looking for shoes at Big 5. Although they had bargains the size he wears were always out and he has some weird desire to not get tennis shoes. I had a car load of stuff in my car all set to be given away so we went to Goodwill. I glanced in the window and saw a bunch of cool looking things so after giving a bunch of stuff away I went in to look for other stuff to take home. My goal was to get a nice storage unit for the kitchen. I need shelves because I have a big pantry and no shelves. I ended up finding a few cool things in there but nothing I really had to have. I wanted a Polaroid camera I saw being sold for 4 dollars enough to get it. As I headed to the front I saw a display case with decent cameras and other electronics that might walk away in someone's pocket a lot faster then a bulky Polaroid camera. I was looking at the case that had some cool stuff when I saw an old large case tucked behind a flat screen computer monitor. It turned out to be an old slr camera with 3 lens made by Mamiyo/Sekor for $40. I decided to buy it and I am absolutely buzzing about trying this thing out! I loaded film in it and I plan on taking this thing out this weekend to take some pictures. I will also use the digital camera my mom gave me (thanks mom) to take some pictures of the new camera. It takes film so it may be a week or so before I can get pictures made to show you. Who knows maybe they won't be worth showing. Of course I hope they are.
After that we headed to look at shoes at GI Joe's where my dad's tiny feet once again denied him the righteous feeling of bargain priced shoes. From there we headed to Barnes and Noble to read for a few more hours and for my dad to find books to buy with his other gift card. Then the night had to end... boo! I found myself at work today and wanting to go home and play with my new camera and my new guitar but instead In was at work making sure I didn't have to live in my car using my guitar case as a sleeping bag......
Monday, March 26, 2007
I can not Acknowledge or Deny that this is a Real Post
Sunday was a bad day for Oregon sports. The Blazers lost the Ducks lost. It was brutal. I only watched one game, the Ducks. Those darn gators! Anyway I was bumming around after the game, the sun broke through so every Oregonian ran outside for that time period. I had lunch at a Sushi place that had the little motorized track that whipped the dishes around and you grabbed what you wanted. Just in case you are wondering it is only slightly cheaper there, the dishes are less expensive but the rolls are usually smaller. Although a little bowl of edamame were just a buck so I had two. I had earlier spent an hour at the Guitar Center wandering around trying to convince myself not to get a guitar, an hour later I was at home.... I neither deny or acknowledge that I have a Fender acoustic guitar sitting in my living room. I also can not deny or acknowledge that my fingers hurt from constantly playing said guitar these last to days. In fact, I can not deny or acknowledge that I am now thinking about not going to bed and just playing said guitar all night. If said guitar were in my living room and my said fingertips were indeed a touch tender, I may want to not play said guitar all night and allow my fingers to rest until tomorrow when I can spend another couple hours playing guitar, only to realize that I missed all my TV shows without even caring. Of course I neither deny or acknowledge any part of this last paragraph.....
In other news I may or may not have watched Jackass 2. I may or may not have found it incredibly funny and horrible to watch all at the same time. I may or may not be a fan of both movies and I may or may not have never actually watched the TV show but really loved the over the top movies even with all the naked male buttocks. I can not deny or acknowledge that some of the stunts with the bull caused me to laugh so hard I was coughing and thought I was going to hurl like the Jackass guys may or may not have been doing at the time. I may or may not have almost cried with laughter during the terrorist taxi bit. I may or may not have completely enjoyed when Johnny Knoxville nearly had a major accident while trying to ride a really huge red rocket. I may or may not have had to get up a few times while extremely gross stuff happened and walk to the other room until the part was over. I may or may not recommend this to people that liked the original.
Of course this may or may not have ever been posted.
In other news I may or may not have watched Jackass 2. I may or may not have found it incredibly funny and horrible to watch all at the same time. I may or may not be a fan of both movies and I may or may not have never actually watched the TV show but really loved the over the top movies even with all the naked male buttocks. I can not deny or acknowledge that some of the stunts with the bull caused me to laugh so hard I was coughing and thought I was going to hurl like the Jackass guys may or may not have been doing at the time. I may or may not have almost cried with laughter during the terrorist taxi bit. I may or may not have completely enjoyed when Johnny Knoxville nearly had a major accident while trying to ride a really huge red rocket. I may or may not have had to get up a few times while extremely gross stuff happened and walk to the other room until the part was over. I may or may not recommend this to people that liked the original.
Of course this may or may not have ever been posted.
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