Thursday, April 05, 2012

The Money (pt. 2)

Normally, if this really were a bad '80's movie, I would spend my blacked out experience reliving the last few days so that I could fill in the audience on what happened. Unfortunately this isn't a bad movie andmy mind doesn't like following rules. Instead I am stuck following 3 pink rabbits who occasionally kick me for no apparent reason. Well no reason besides that they are evil devil worshipping Satan spawn rabbits. I am still not clear why I know that about them because, like real rabbits, they can't talk. I am also not clear on why a Satan spawn would also be a devil worshipper. I could share our adventures but they don't really make sense. I could also blather incessantly about how dreams make total sense while your asleep but no sense once you awaken but I am kind of awake and in pain now. It seems the illustrated porcupine has a taste for ripping off fingernails and I am in the middle of screaming bloody murder.

"Don't start on the next one Shawn! The goal is to get him to talk not to wilt in pain!" Jimmy screams. Such compassion.

I whimper something that is supposed to sound bold and brave but that fingernail deduction really sucked. My whole hand is on fire from him pulling out one freaking fingernail!

"What was that? Did you feel like talking? You can tell Shawnie!"

I almost throw up at his self imposed nickname (or perhaps it is the blinding pain) but instead I look up at him and I repeat myself. My mom didn't raise no fools.... well with the exception of me she didn't. "I said I specifically requested a pedicure with a high gloss clear coat and not all this red...."

My voice is barely a whisper but he hears me and his eyes broadcast instant anger. I find myself instantly wondering why this looks so much cooler in the movies as he leaps at me with the pliers. Once again I find myself in the weird position of thanking Jimmy for coming to my rescue as he collars Shawn and drags him, screaming newly created curse words at me, from the room.

"I never knew you were this friggin' stupid kid. Just get us the money. Ain't you got no family you could get the four grand from? You seem a likable guy, at least a guy with some con ability. Someone who could talk his way into some one's pocket. Yet here you are talking crap to a man who wants to make you suffer." Oompah says to me and it is starting to sound like true compassion. I try to stay focused and stop envisioning him singing the songs from the original Chocolate Factory movie. "You clear your frigging head! When I come back, I hope you have come up with a plan. I honestly don't got the stomach for murder and I hate the fingernail thing. If it were up to me I would have just beat you into the hospital but you caught the eye of those above me. So now we can't let you go with out showing something."

Once he has left I start to regroup. It is not easy with the throbbing of my hand but I manage to get a handle on a few things. Most importantly I start to realize that I don't like being hurt and that I need to make it out alive and with no more assaults to my person. After I come to a realization that should have been obvious, I start to look around the place. I see a camera looking at me. Which seems odd... who records torture? A part of me thinks it is just a b.s. psych out thing but the other part of me is sure that the ones in charge want their proof. They want to see me break. I am not wild about being watched so I push myself up to my feet and stumble my way underneath it, so I am only partially in it's view. The camera doesn't move. I turn my focus to inventorying this room. There isn't must besides blood and me. Nothing is in my pockets and I don't have my shoes. I spend the next few minutes being pissed about losing those shoes, I made them myself online. They were sweet. I realize I am drifting again and I tell the rabbits to leave me alone.

I know now that I won't outwit or overpower them in my current state. I spend a few depressing minutes feeling my pain and thinking about my impending painful demise. Once I am done with that I began trying to think of every single person I have ever oweed me a favor.....

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