Monday, August 07, 2006

The Rambling Review of CHICKEN LITTLE

There has been a lot going on in the past week. I have given up my cable because I couldn't afford it. I have taken and quit a job. I am about to start a new job o tomorrow. It seemed like a day to see a movie. I had canceled Netflix but apparently not before they took their $15.00 charge out. So when I checked the mail I had 2 films waiting for me. Chicken Little and Aeon Flux. I looked at the two and I thought Chicken Little is the safe bet..... so now I bring you the RAMBLING REVIEW of CHICKEN LITTLE!!!

(These reviews so need theme music)

This is a Disney movie that is retelling an old fable. Familiar country for that kid friendly giant with the mouse ears. Unfortunately everyone that made this film is a comlete and total idiot. Ok, maybe I am going to far. Maybe kids shows don't have to be good, I mean they are after all for kids. The same group that love Barney, Teletubbies and the Wiggles. It's not as if they are charging money to both child and adults to see this. Oh wait they are. This is not ok there is no excuse for this movie. This movie was just plain awful. It is not funny, entertaining or even all that clever. Hold on this is a review not a bash so let me step back for a minute.

The story. A small crazy chicken freaks out his town, not a barn but a town. Yes there are no humans in this town it is just like a Richard Scarry book brought to life, if Richard Scarry was the worst writer in the world! Anyway so he freaks out the whole town by telling them the sky is falling. Mayhem ensues and then they figure he must be crazy. His dad hurriedly pushes the my son is crazy angle. His dad is lame, there are no redeeming qualities in his dad. He doesn't believe in his son until the end and he basically makes Chicken Little feel like a failure through the whole movie. Great fun... laugh riot. I love movies about disfunctional family relations and I bet so do the kids!! Anyway so everyone turns it into a big teasing game. The other animals are mean to him except an ugly duck, a pig so fat it can't hardly move and and a fish with a divers helmet full of water. Yeah, gee, I wonder why he gets picked on. Of course we find out that something really did fall from the sky. It was a piece of an alien spacecraft. The aliens seem mean and chase Chicken Little and his homies around until once again Chicken Little alerts the town and the town misses the show completely and they think he is crazy again. Dad comes back in apologizing for the kid. Then Chicken Little discovers a little alien that was left behind. At that moment the aliens start invading but they don't want to conquer the world they just want to find their kid. So a lot of senseless and stupid mayhem ensues, Chicken Little and his dad make up, Chicken Little shows the ugly duck some love and then he, his friends and his pops save the day. Woofreakinghoo! But wait there's more! The end has them all watching a movie abut what happened. It was like channeling Pee Wee's Big Adventure's ending. This was the best part. The last 2 minutes.
They have some serious star power in this movie: Garry Marshall, Zach Braff, Don Knotts, Patrick Stewart, Wallace Shawn, Joan Cusack, and Adam West. I mean they have quite a list of people but the movie was just bad. There was nothing redeemable about this movie. It wasn't cute, the story was horrible, and the characters were annoying. This screen shot of the pig shows exactly what I thought of the movie - A real stomach turner!

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